I'll find someone like you
by Asifweneversaidgoodbye
Summary: When Darren hears Chris listening to Adele's mash-up he gets worried. Didn't Chris say he listens to Adele when he's got his heart broken? He is bound to found out. CrissColfer fanfic!
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone!  
>Yesterday I saw a post of with-all-your-lies on Tumblr asking for a fanfic. So I started one :) I hope you like it and feel free to tell me what you think about it!<p>

**Rating**: NC-17  
><strong>PairingCharacter(s)**: Chris/Darren  
><strong>Spoilers<strong>: Nope.  
><strong>Warnings<strong>: The usual. You know. When there are two guys involved in a romantic fanfic  
><strong>Author Notes:<strong> Based on the awesome mash-up from Adele and probably will include the photoshoot/interview of Darren!  
><strong>Summary: <strong>When Darren hears Chris listening to Adele's mash-up he gets worried. Didn't Chris say he listens to Adele when he's got his heart broken? He is bound to found out.

Oh and yeah. I don't own Glee, Chris Colfer and Darren Criss. Because if I did.. well, let's not go there

**Chapter 1**

**-Darren-**

I just made my way down to my trailer, when a very familiar song sounded in the air. One quick look on my phone told me it wasn't someone calling. Straining my ears, I suddenly noticed it was coming out one of the trailers. Chris his trailer. I smiled at hearing it and walked through. It _was _a very good song. I would probably listen to it when I got in my own trailer too. Opening my door, I dropped the keys on the table and lay down on the couch. Softly I began singing the song I just heard, because the melody was still in my head.

_Sheeee, she ain't reeeeal  
>She ain't gonna be able to love you like I will<br>Suhure, she's got it aaahaall  
>But baby-<em>

Suddenly I stopped singing the lyrics. Wait. It was a song of Adele! _Yeah duh Darren. Geez. How very smart of you! _My brain really loved me. It did. Shaking my head softly I tried really hard to remember something Chris had tweeted a while ago. Not that I was checking everything the guy tweeted. I wasn't. It was something about Adele.. What was it? _He just said he listens to Adele when he's heartbroken Darren. Do I really have to remember everything for you?_ Well yeah. You are my brain! I still didn't understand why people didn't believe the fact that I was a nerd. I mean. I had conversations with my brain! _Focus Darren!_ Right! Chris was listening to Adele. So did that mean he was heartbroken? And if that was the case, who the hell made him that way? Was he dating someone? And if he was, why didn't I know? We were best friends, right? At least I thought so.. Maybe I was just overreacting. It could also be just a playlist of the new songs of Glee, Chris was listening to. Yeah, that was probably the case. Smiling to myself I relaxed on the couch again. _What are you doing? Go check on him you hobbit! _"Hey! I'm not a hobbit!" I yelled. To myself. Right, never do that again. But should I? Apparently my brain decided then to also control the rest of me, because my hand was already on the door handle. Alright, I was just going to check on him to make sure he's alright.

One step outside my trailer I noticed the same melody flowing through the air. So the song was on repeat? Okay, that wasn't right. I walked the way to Chris his trailer, and determinately knocked on his door.

"Who is it?" Chris his voice sounded muffled through the door.

"It's me, Darren." A big clang was heart and a lot of swearing. Raising my eyebrows, I became increasingly convinced that something was wrong.

"I'm coming! Just-" Shuffling my feet I listened to the sounds that where coming from the other side. What the hell was he doing in there?

"Chris?"

"Coming! Two sec's!" I nodded, although he couldn't see me and waited. The music was turned off and half a minute later the door opened.

"Hey!" I said before I noticed the way Chris looked. Troubled, wary and sad. "Chris! What's going on?" My voice sounded nervous and worried. Chris blushed immediately and tried to plaster a surprised expression on his face.

"Nothing! I was just.. cleaning up," he said rather stressed. One look inside told me he _wasn't _cleaning up.

"Oh okay," I said nonetheless. "Do you need some help?"

"No that's not necessary.." Chris was trying really hard to look past me, but me swaying a bit to the side and giving him my sweetest smile, made him give in. At least, I hoped so. "I was just finished, really," he tried. Okay, this wasn't going to work.

"Chris" I started and laid my hand on his arm. His reaction, the flinch and the harsh intake of breath, caught me off guard. "Chris? What's wrong?" I asked, my voice softer and my hand hanging useless to my side.

"No-nothing is wrong Darren, I just.. Can you just give me some time to myself? I'm just tired, that's it." _Tired, yeah right._

"Chris, I'm your friend right?" His sudden, automatic, soft whispered "My best..", made me feel something. I didn't think about it though and went on. "I heard it.." His eyes went round as saucers, but he tried to hide it just as fast.

"You heard what? You're making no sense at all, Darren." Oh, so the defensive side was on. Something _definitely _was wrong.

"I just walked by and heard Adele."

"Yeah well I just put it off, because you knocked on my door. So?" His detached tone, worried me. It worried me a lot.

"Chris, come on tell me!"

"Tell you _what_ exactly Darren? You confuse me!" The fact that I was still standing outside his door instead of laughing with him on his couch, said enough to me. He didn't want me here! But I refused to walk away now.

"Chris. You only listen to Adele when you have your heart broken." Chris paled and his knuckles turned white.

"That's ridiculous."

"You said so yourself! On twitter!" He laughed, but the sound was bitter and harsh instead of his usual laugh.

"Oh so you're checking that sources now? You could just _talk _to me you know. Never mind. I did said that on Twitter, but you of all people should know that I don't always give honest answers to questions on there. And if it was true, not that I say that it is. Do I look like I'm heartbroken? I was just listening to this mash-up because it's freaking awesome!" Chris was rambling. He was defending himself. Didn't that mean I was right?

"Chris.." I tried again.

"Forget about it Darren, I will listen to some other music if it bothers you.."

"I didn't bo-" "Don't worry. Nothing is wrong. I'm perfectly fine as you can see and I was just finishing a chapter of my book, so if you don't mind, I would like to go further on that. See you later Dare!" And just like that the door was smashed in my face._ Oookay? _That didn't go quite as planned as I would've liked. But then again, I didn't really had a plan. Chris was lying to me, and it hurt more then I actually liked to admit. He said so himself! I was his best friend, so what the hell did I do wrong? What the hell did _some other guy_ do to him? It was my new mission to find out.

_AN; Thanks for reading this! :) If you like it please review, it would make my day! Next chapter will be in Chris his perspective.._


	2. Chapter 2

**Story:** Based on the awesome mash-up from Adele and probably will include the photoshoot/interview of Darren! Oh and yeah. I don't own Glee, Chris Colfer and Darren Criss. Because if I did.. well, let's not go there

**_Summary:_** _When Darren hears Chris listening to Adele's mash-up he gets worried. Didn't Chris say he listens to Adele when he's got his heart broken? He is bound to found out._

**AN**: Hey! Thanks so much for giving me a chance with this! I honestly didn't expect anything at all, but the 8 story alerts, 2 favorite stories and 1 favorite author really made my day! You're awesome 3 Don't be afraid to leave a review! I'll try to answer them! I'm sorry for having such a messy first chap though, I used the enter more in this one ;) I hope you like this chapter! _This is the only time I will use the same scene from both perspectives. I just really needed to see this from both sides :)_

**Chapter 2**

- Chris –

I hated him. I did. I really did. But he was just so.. so _Darren_! I let out a frustrated sigh and dropped myself on my couch. Why did I even listen to what he was telling? I should have just walked away. But no, my brilliant mind thought it was a good idea to stick around to listen to the jolly dolly talk about his newest crush. I hated him. And I hated her. Her name was probably something as Liberty, or something just as equally crap. It should be, because she deserved such a name for having Darren. Before I knew it, I putted my Iphone in the station and skipped through my songs until I had it. There. The perfect song for my _fucking _perfect mood. Walking to my fridge, I took out a small pack of New York Super Fudge Chunk. Cause really, there was nothing better! With my little wooden spoon in the air, I was singing loudly.

_Suuuure! She's got it ahaall  
>But baby is that really what you want?<em>

__Who was I kidding? It probably was exactly what he wants. He was standing there al _happy_ and ridiculously _bouncy_. I hated him. He looked so goddamn cheerful, I wanted to hit him. And the girls were all over him, just smiling and '_awee'ing _about his latest catch. Not that I cared, no. I hated him. I didn't care that he had found someone who he thought he was going to spend of his life with. Not that he said that, but he probably thought it.

_Bless your soul, you've got your head in the CLOUDS  
>You made a FOOL out of YOU<br>And BOY, she's bringing you dohown_

Or not. Maybe she was a perfect catch. Maybe she was _the one_. It was possible. Liberty probably liked Disney movies and Harry Potter. She probably knew every quote of a Very Potter Musical and Sequel. She probably has a very good singing voice, that matches his. And wouldn't Darren love _that_?

_Now rumour has it I ain't got your love anymore  
>Don't forget me, I beg!<br>I remember.. you said_

A cold tear slid down my warm cheek. Frustrated, I wiped it away with the back of my hand. He didn't deserve my tears. Why was I crying for the fact that Darren didn't chose me? Wasn't it very clear from the beginning, that I never stood a chance? I could still try to be my best, to be the best friend I could be, but that was just it, wasn't it? I would never be more than a friend. Because Darren was straight. That's right. He was straight with a lot of other tendencies, but straight nonetheless. At that moment someone knocked on my door. Shit, who was it and what did he want from me?

"Who is it?" I asked.

"It's me, Darren" _Fuck. _Out of shock I dropped my ice-cream. _Damnit! _He had already ruined my day and now he had to ruin my pity food too? Not to mention my floor.. I suddenly realized Darren was waiting for me. _Shit._

"I'm coming! Just-" It was such a mess in here! _I _was such a mess! I couldn't show myself like this! I ran to my little toilet and checked myself in the mirror. _I look like hell._ Okay, so that's something I probably should explain. Running back, I tried to clean up the melted ice.

"Chris?" Couldn't he wait! It was _his _fault after all.

"Coming! Two sec's!" I quickly turned off the radio and opened the door. I should have prepared myself for the sight. I should have known one look at him made me realize I didn't hate him at all. He was just so _freaking perfect._ Yeah, perfect and totally unreachable. Right. Acting time.

"Hey! Chris! What's going on?" He shouldn't sound so worried and compassionate! Didn't he know what his voice alone did to me? Probably not, he was so oblivious most of the time.

"Nothing! I was just.. cleaning up!" _Great Christopher. Brilliant. Couldn't have thought of something better?_

"Oh okay,do you need some help?" Always the perfect gentleman.

"No, that's not necessary. I was just finished, really," I said, really trying to look past him, because one look in his soft brown eyes would probably break me right now.

"Chris" he said in the same worried voice he used earlier. All of the sudden his hand was on my arm and it was just too much. It wasn't that he hadn't done that before, I just was such a mess right now. Could he honestly not see what he was doing to me?

"Chris? What's wrong?" Shit, did I show my inner struggle? And why did he sound so.. hurt?

"No-nothing is wrong Darren, I just.. Can you just give me some time to myself? I'm just tired, that's it." _Darren drop it, please drop it and leave. Please!_

"Chris, I'm your friend right?" I couldn't stop myself.

"My best.."

"I heard it.." He heard it? He heard what? _Oh shit! _He probably heard me singing the lines and he knows! _He knows! _My heart was drumming inside my ears. Deny everything!

"You heard what? You're making no sense at all, Darren."

"I just walked by and heard Adele." He heard Adele. So he didn't hear me. That was good, right?

"Yeah well I just put it off, because you knocked on my door. So?"

"Chris, come on tell me!" he said with furrowed eyebrows. This guy was infuriating!

"Tell you _what_ exactly Darren? You confuse me!"

"Chris. You only listen to Adele when you have your heart broken." How the hell did he know that. And why the hell did he remember that?

"That's ridiculous." I stated, sounding much more sure than I felt.

"You said so yourself! On twitter!" I couldn't believe this.

"Oh so you're checking that sources now? You could just _talk _to me you know. Never mind. I did say that on Twitter, but you of all people should know that I don't always give honest answers to questions on there. And if it was true, not that I say that it is. Do I look like I'm heartbroken? I was just listening to this mash-up because it's freaking awesome!" I thanked God and everyone who was willing to listen for my quick tongue. I never failed in answering questions or defending myself.

"Chris.."

"Forget about it Darren, I will listen to some other music if it bothers you.." He tried to interrupt me, but I didn't let him. "Don't worry. Nothing is wrong. I'm perfectly fine as you can see and I was just finishing a chapter of my book, so if you don't mind, I would like to go further on that. See you later Dare!" I quickly shut the door. It probably was really rude and it probably only made him question my state of mind even more, but I just couldn't take it anymore! It was one thing having your heart broken, but it was another thing if the one who broke you heart was knocking on your door, trying to glue the pieces right back together without even knowing he was the cause of it all.

_Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurt instead.._

_AN: Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think about it! You can also drop questions/wishes in reviews! I'll try to use it all :) I already have five chapters so you can expect one chapter a day! Next one will include some texting about the interview for Sexiest Man 2011. Still gushing about the girls & boys thing.._


	3. Chapter 3

AN: I don't own Glee, Chris Colfer and Darren Criss. Because if I did.. well, let's not go there

Now that's out of the way..

Hello again! I can't tell you how excited I am about your response! 25 story alerts, 12 favorites.. Are you even real? You make this girl so happy! :) Here's chapter three.. Some texting about the interview for Sexiest Man!

_**Chapter 3**_

- Darren -

So who could I ask for help? Who knew Chris the best? Next to me, that is. Because I probably knew him better than anyone. Not that he didn't have any friends on set, it's just that we talked so much, like all the time! And still we never were out of topics of conversation. Smiling to myself I remembered the interview I had last week. The one about perfect dates and everything. I really did not feel very comfortable when I was there in my swimming trunks. Why the hell did they pick _me_ of all people for that Sexiest Man crap? My agent told me it would be really good for me to go with it, and of course I felt flattered, but it just wasn't me. I was just Darren. A goofy guy who just loves to sing and play guitar with friends. A simple simple guy who was lucky enough to get to do what he loves for a living. When I was with Chris, I felt exactly that. Just Darren. We could goof around about Star Wars, freak out about Harry Potter, quote my musicals.. Come to think about it, if all my come-togethers with Chris were actually dates, they would have been perfect! A harsh laugh escaped my mouth. Like that was ever going to happen.

Back to the case at hand. Something was wrong with Chris. And he didn't want to tell me what it was. I knew him better than anyone, so no one could help me with this. I had to found out for myself. Not that I minded, I would do everything for Chris. Tomorrow I would try again, when I would see him on set. He couldn't smash any doors in my face there.

Try as I might, Chris did a pretty good job of avoiding me the coming day. We did had a scene to shoot together, but when there was a cut, he was very quick with reasons to bail on me.

"I need to go to the toilet!"

"My mum called, be right back!"

"Ryan needed to see me!"  
>-<p>

Yadayadayada. He _really_ didn't want to speak to me. This actually hurt a lot more then I liked to acknowledge. When he came back from his 'meeting' with 'Ryan', I walked straight at him.

"Hey," I tried and give him a lopsided smile. His hand twitched and he looked like he wanted to make up another excuse for leaving me. But I was having none of that.

"How you doing today? I haven't really spoken to you yet!" Slowly I dropped my hand on his shoulder. A soft gasp escaped his lips.

"I'm sorry, work's a bitch," he said rushed and gave me a smile. The smile never reached his eyes though. His eyes looked like he wanted to run, hide and cry. It was scary to see him like this. I wanted to hold him tight, protect him from the world and never let him go, but at the same time he looked at me like I was the last person he wanted to be with at the moment.

"Yeah, tell me about it.. I miss you though! Can't we get some coffee? You could come to my trailer later today? Maybe we can run some lines or something?" _Stop giving him __options, you fool. You make it look like you want a date! _Well.. _Hush. _Okay.

Chris his face looked even more shattered then before and I hated myself for doing that. What did I even do?

"Dare.."

"Chris please, I don't know what's wrong or what I did wrong, but you can't stop talking to me! I'm your friend! I love talking to you! What did I do? Please tell me"

He shook his head and bit his lower lip. "It's not you, it's me. Trust me. I miss you too, but I really have something going on at the moment and it's just.. It's just hard to deal with at the moment. I really need some time. Can you give me that?"

His pleading eyes and his soft voices, made me say yes before I knew it.

"Thanks.. Now let's get this scene over with! We can't keep the fans waiting!" I laughed with him and we went back to the scene. I would give Chris some time, but not much. I needed him, damnit and I needed to so him happy.

A beeping noise woke me up. Disoriented, I looked around. Great, I fell asleep on my couch. Stretching the sore muscles in my back, I noticed my mobile phone lighting up.

_One new text message_

Curious to who it was, I opened it.

"_I know your love for Disney is far going, but you look like freakin' Ariel in there Dare. You rock the look though" _

Laughing out loud, I wanted to call him, but he probably still didn't really wanted to _talk_, so I just texted him back. I didn't mention the fact that I _felt_ like Ariel in there and therefore knew exactly what he was talking about. I maybe even have been singing 'Under the Sea' when I ran through the waves.

_Gee, Chris, thanks! I wanted to dye my hair red too, but then I wouldn't be sexy anymore according to the magazinepeople. Buzzkillers. I guess I don't wanna be where the people are_

_You probably still look sexy when you're having a mustache, wearing a garbage bag and shave off all your hair. _

I wanted to text him back, but my phone was already beeping again.

_No I take that back. The hair is nice. Keep it. _Was it really stupid that my heart fluttered at those words?

_Will do. How did you get the photo's anyway?_

_I'm not sure I want to answer that. You really shouldn't look. Hell, I shouldn't have looked. It's a scary place. It is!_

Did Chris go on Tumblr? What the heck! I thought he didn't check on himself anymore after the accident with Google and the bashing on his person. But.. He didn't look on himself. Because he had found pictures of me. Wait. Did Chris use my name as a tag? Why would he do that? And what did he see?

_My my Chris. Were you trying to find out if the fangirls think I'm sexier than you?_

_Says the guy who is in the Sexiest Man 2011 Magazine. _

_You're avoiding the question Colfer._

_And it's not working, is it? Don't flatter yourself Criss. The link was sent to me by Ash. Now I'm going to get some work done, like the responsible adult that I am. See you tomorrow! :)_

Grinning as an idiot I texted '_Looking forward to it! X-D' _back and putted my phone away. God, I did miss him! Just this little texting, made my whole day. And the fact that he was actually talking to me again, although through phone, made me even happier. Chris liked me again! _You sound like a five year old.._ Shut up, you know you like it too. _True. _Picking up my script I tried to find the episode we would shoot tomorrow. Looking at my schedule, I noticed I had to film the scene with Chris from Let it snow. My lips turned into an even brighter smile. Tomorrow I would see Chris again, I would sing a duet with him and I would be able to act all lovey-dovey with him and no one would notice a thing. I loved my life.

_AN: Thanks for reading again! Let me know what you think about it! Reviews are like hot chocolate with marshmallows *grins* And I'll respond to you if you want! You can also drop questions/wishes in reviews! I'm open for many things! :) And just.. thanks again for reacting this way on my story! It's a bit hard to believe actually! But I love you guys!_

_Oh! And.. if I make mistakes in my chapters with words or grammar, please let me know! English isn't my native language, Dutch is, but I try! :)_


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer; Do _not_ own any of these guys. And it's fictional. *sadly..***

**AN: Oh my god! I can't tell you how much you guys are freaking me out! Thank you so much for all the alerts and favorites! You are totally awesome! :) **

**Thanks for bearing with me though, you probably expected this chapter a bit sooner right? Well I'm sorry! But with chapter 3 someone messaged me and now I have a beta! (Feels awesome I can tell ya!) So I hope the chapters are better now!**

**I dedicate this chapter to 'my bad bella', because she gave the most awesome review 3**

**Chapter 4**

- Chris –

After the talk with Darren I realized I really shouldn't push Darren away. He thought it was his fault I was acting this way and although it was true, in a way, it wasn't his intent to hurt me, so I shouldn't hurt him either. And besides, I really needed to get over the fact that I was in love with him. Because he, for far to many reasons, wasn't in love with me. And that was that. I really needed to deal with that fact and get on with my life.

Checking my mail, I found a message from Ashley. Smiling already, I opened it.

_Hello my future husband!_

_How are you doing? I haven't spoken to you for a while and I miss you! I know it's because I have no life and you try to outdo yours, but that should never stop us from seeing each other, agreed? So anyway. The real reason why I _really_ needed to send you an email is because I found something rather interesting. Guess who's in the newest Sexiest Man Alive In 2011 edition? _

_Darren. Freakin. Criss._

_And god, he's hot. And because I know you've have a secret crush on him for half of your life (secret's safe with me, no worries) I thought you would like to see this._

Http : / www . Youtube .com/watch? v = rlbrxWprC9w & feature=related

_See ya later love! Call me, ok? I really do miss my best friend._

_Mrs. Colfer_

She really was the greatest friend I ever had. Sometimes I wondered what I did to deserve her. But the thing she wrote about Darren, did shock me a bit. Not that I didn't agree on the fact that he _was _the sexiest man alive, it was just.. it wasn't Darren. At all. Darren was a nerd, just like me and to be put on _such _a pedestal.. It didn't quite suit him. Nonetheless, I was.. interested. Yes, I would go with interested, because turned on wouldn't do.

"Both actors are being honored for their assets, plus they're spoiling their secret crushes"

Wait. What? Secret crushes? What the hell..? The YouTube video moved on, so I didn't pause on that too much.

Oh there he was! _Holysweetmotherofhell. Fuck. He is Sexy. With an capital S. Hell, with capitals all over the place! Gleeful indeed!_ I tried really hard to not drool. But a very wet, shirtless Darren was just.. doing things to me. It was.

"I went for a swim.. In my jeans. That's really great" Great way to break the spell Darren. It did confirm my earlier suspicions, about the fact that this wasn't really Darren. I mean, he was called the sexiest man and all he can talk about is that he went for a swim in his jeans. Come on. N-E-R-D all over the place! And _God _didn't I love him even more for it.

"Conversation is probably the most important aspect to any date for me" _Well I could agree to that. _

"So does Darren have a cast-crush?" After that I listened to him gush about his Glee Co Star Dianna Agron!" What the.. ? Dianna? Sure she was.. beautiful and to nice to be true, but did Darren had a _crush_ on Dianna? Why the hell didn't he ever tell me that? Bastard.

"I wouldn't flatter myself to think I'm on her level. She's in another world of uh.. of fantastic." Damn him. Damn him and his adorable, cute, noble words.

I watched the video again. And again. And really didn't pause on the scenes when he was shirtless. Really. I didn't. But after I saw it for the sixth time, I noticed little things. The way he looked uncomfortable at that rock, his smile a bit off. The way he talked about conversation being important, but looking like he really didn't want to say that, because it felt too private. And the way he talked about Dianna.. It really just looked like he was talking _about her._ Not about his _crush. _Yes it was with compliments and smiles, but Darren talked that way about everyone he liked. I mean after all damn he praised _me _sky-high every time someone asked him about working with me. I couldn't help but smile. This video just was _so _Darren. I really should call Ashley.

– – – –

"HOTSTUFF!" she screamed in my ear. I laughed and hold the phone a bit away.

"Sexy lady! How is my lovely wife doing?" I asked her, flopping myself down on my bed.

"She's doing just great. Rewatching a YouTube video for the twentieth time. And how is my cheating-with-the-pool guy-husband doing?"

"Just peachy! I haven't watched it yet. So I don't know what you're talking about."

"Really? Because you should really check out Darren's wet abs. He's fucking gorgeous. It's good that he's yours, because otherwise I would totally do him." I was laughing so hard, by stomach was hurting. _He's yours. _I wish he was.

"I love you Ash."

"Love you too Colfer. But really, you did look, didn't you?" I sighed.

"Of course I did. You must really hate me, don't you?" Why else would she torture me like this?

"Hate you? Are you kidding me? I gave you wank material for three months!"

"ASHLEY!" my high pitched voice yelled.

"You know I'm right, don't even _try_ to deny it honey." She did know me to goddamn well.

"I hate you."

"Well I love you too. So. Did you check Tumblr out?" One eyebrow shoot up.

"Why the _hell _would I do that? I really like my life right now and really don't wish to die so soon because I stimulate my eyes and certain body parts to much with pictures and gifs I _really_ don't need to see."

"You should. Just type in CrissColfer or Darren Criss. Either way, you'll have material for another four months." She answered and thereby ignored all my comments.

"I'm going to hang up now you know."

"That's because you _really_ want to check Tumblr now, don't you?"

"Beeep beeeep beep.."

"Chris I know it's you."

"Damnit. I've won an golden globes for gods sake. I should be able to imitate a dial tone!"

"I always said that actors are overrated.."

"Aw, you make me feel so special."

"I know I do. Now go! And call me when you've done him, okay?"

"Yeah, like _that's _ever going to happen!"

"Didn't you hear what he said about boys _and_ girls?"

"..What?"

"Tumblr Chris. Bye!" And before I knew it, she hung up on me. Okay. I _really _should check Tumblr out, because if there was just a microtinybitsywitsychance that Darren could be attracted to.. boys, I purposefully ignored the "_me!"_ my brain screamed at me, I should know. Like right now.

– – –

After two hours of reading and seeing way to many gifs, pictures, quotes and god knows what more, I decided I really should quit searching these tags. Ashley was probably right about the material though, not that I would ever allow myself to say that out loud. And the girls and boys comment was rather odd, but it always was a bit difficult to rate answers when you didn't know the exact question. So I tried really hard to not think anything like that.

After seeing a particular picture that was photoshopped so that it looked like Darren was a freaking mermaid, I decided I should text him about this. After letting him know way too much, I decided to text him with something he couldn't really answer on. Great Chris. Just let him know you think he's sexy, that you like his hair _and_ that you went to Tumblr to check on his photos!

My phone buzzed again and I quickly closed the still open window on my laptop that showed a gif with Darren walking through the waves, pulling on his pants. _Why did I feel caught? _ Well. I was just ogling and drooling all over my best friend's half naked pictures.

_Focus! _

Right.

'_Looking forward to it! X_

_- D'_

Oh so there was a kiss now? Not that I minded. I really liked kissing to him, even though it weren't real kisses. At least, that's what I was convincing myself of every time we had a scene kiss, but after seeing all those close-up gifs on Tumblr I realized, we _did_ really kiss each other. Tongues and all. At the time it felt like, you know, just the right thing to do. To make it look even more realistic, but the fact was, neither me nor Darren actually mentioned doing a fake kiss. It was just so natural to kiss with him, neither of us seemed to be bothered by it. Yeah, there were certain.. body parts of me that were actually 'bothered' by kissing him, but thankfully Darren never found out about that. Not even during 'the first time scene'.

At that moment my phone buzzed again. Thinking it would be Ashley, I picked up my phone without checking the callers ID.

"Hi honey!" I naturally said. A laugh was heard on the other side of the phone and I cursed softly. It was Darren!

"Hey baby!" The way his voice was a bit raspy when he said that, made me feel shivers right down my back.

"I thought you were Ashley," I said slightly breathless. He chuckled and I could have sworn I just heard his knowing smirk.

"I'm sure you did, but _honey,_" he said and I hated the way he slightly slurred that last word. "I'm bored." I let myself down on my bed again, before I answered.

"And you're telling this to me, because?"

"I miss you. And I'm bored. Are you doing something useful?" Did he miss me? He just texted me like ten minutes ago!

"Uhm. I was actually." What the hell could I make up that counted as useful?

"No you're not. So. Can I come over?" I just knew he was bouncing up and down on his couch.

"If I say no, you would come anyway. I'll just clean up my useful tasks and grab some Apple juice for you."

"Minute Maid?"

"Did you really just ask me that?"

"Did I mention that I love you?" My heart stilled for two seconds. He didn't mean it like that, but _God_ did I want it.

"When will you be here?"

"Open the door already!" he said loudly, and I heard his smile. At that moment there was a knocking in my door in the tune of do-re-mi from the Sound of Music. I hung up and smiled. Even though the guy broke my heart, I really couldn't keep him away from me. And truthfully? I wouldn't want it any other way.

**AN: Thank you so much for reading this! I hope you like it! :) I definitely had fun writing it! Please review! They make me so happy!**

**Next chapter will have some talking and some drama! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclamer: Do _not _own anything except my imagination**

**AN; Did I forgot to tell who my awesome beta is? :o I'm so sorry honey! Thank you sooo soo much Gleeker1985 for wanting to be my beta :) Love you honey! Can't thank you enough!**

**And because you had to wait a few days, I decided to upload a new chapter again today! To make it right ;)  
>So here it is! <strong>

**Chapter 5**

- Darren –

Okay, so I couldn't wait till the next day. So what? Chris was my friend, and that gave me the right to call him. _Are you trying to convince yourself you are allowed to call Chris?_ Am I? _Like I care. _I snorted out loud and shook my head. Oh, if people just could look into my head.. They would be petrified! I actually still was a bit scared that someone, one day, would find out how to use legilimency on someone's mind. Because if that ever happened, I was screwed. And just then Chris picked up his phone.

"Hi honey!" Okay, if that didn't just made something in my stomach flutter.. A nervous but amused laugh escaped my throat. So I was honey now? This could be interesting.

– – – –

Chris opened his door and had this look on his face. Everyone probably knew this look. It just shouted 'I'm-still-trying-to-figure-out-if-you're-worth-my-time'. I decided now was my time to probably be a little bold.

"Hey baby!" I said gleefully and pecked him on the cheek. I was already past him when I noticed he stood there a bit dazed. Actually frozen, was more like it.

"Chris?" I asked and felt immediate regret. Was I too forward? I noticed his intake of breath, but then he was already turned around, and looked all calm and happy again.

"Honey, you know what we agreed on. No PDA's before the door is closed!" I really didn't see that one coming. Well then. I decided to play along, because I for one was really curious about where this was going.

"I know, I'm sorry babe. But I really can't help myself when you're looking like that!" Purposefully, I let my eyes go up and down on him, and nodded approvingly. Honestly I really didn't have to act that part, because he looked good. Hell he looked _freaking amazing. _Meanwhile he smiled, and I felt a rush of adrenaline inside of me, because his cheeks looked a bit tinged.

"I'm sorry for being so tense the other day." He really did look sorry, and that was all it took for me to not be the least bit angry at him for shutting the door in my face. He grabbed the promised apple juice and put it on the tabletop. When he walked past me, I caught his scent, and it made my head light all of a sudden. I really was screwed, wasn't I?

"It's no big deal, I just.. I was really worried you know? I care about you.. a lot." I really hoped that my voice didn't reflect the longing I actually felt.

"I know.." Chris looked like he was to ask me something, but then he stopped, his mouth slightly open. He actually looked a bit like when Kurt asked Blaine why he was doing the duet with him. Slightly confused, hopeful and curious at the same time. And then he did say something, and it caught me a bit of guard.

"I heard about your new crush." His tone was really unreadable and I swear there were question marks hanging above my head. I didn't dare to look though.

"What crush are you talking about?" I asked him lamely, because God! If he knew I was screwed. If he knew, I would lose my best friend. Chris gave a chuckle and looked at me with a 'Duh!' expression. Trying to steal some time I took a swig.

"Dianna! You were talking about her at E! remember?" I almost choked on my juice, before I sputtered out

"Oh! Yeah, well that was just.." But I couldn't end my sentence and explain what _that_ was about, because he already spoke again.

"No, wait! I'm just happy you finally like somebody again, because I know you haven't liked _anyone _for a looong time mister." Yeah he knew. Because his shoulder was the one I was crying my freaking heart on out the last time Mia broke up with me.

"And I think it's kind of helpful to hear that I'm not alone.." He went on. I really couldn't help myself.

"Cause baby you're not alone! Cause you're here with me! And nothings ever gonna bring us down!" The sound of his _real _laugh rang through the trailer and it made me incredibly happy. It was really scary to see Chris so closed off the other day. Thankfully everything was alright again. But.. what did he mean?_ Ask him you moron. _Oh! Yeah. I should do that.

"I'm sorry, I just had to.. What do you mean though?"

"Well you know," he said and rolled his eyes. "Having a hopeless crush and things like th-"

"Chris!" I interrupted him and he looked a bit panicked. Like I could squash him under my shoe like an insect in just one second. "I do _not_ like Dianna." He did that perfect one eyebrow high up in the air thing.

"Oh no that's not true. I do like Dianna. I just don't _like_ like her. You know?"

"_Like_ like her? Really, Darren? How old are you?" I blushed and mumbled 'five and a half I guess..'. His laughter rang in my ear and it made me feel even hotter.

"I mean, they didn't ask me 'Who's your crush?', they asked me what I thought about Dianna. So.. that was my answer." I nodded inwardly. Good explaining. _Do you need a pat on your shoulder?_ Ignoring my brain for two seconds, I looked at Chris. His face was still as unreadable as before.

"I know, you're just so humble and enthusiastic like.. all the time. I know how interviewers can be. They ask you 'How do you like your burger?' and you would say 'I like them hot, fresh and in my mouth' and they make it look like you answered that about your boyfriend or something. Or.. Girlfriend in your case." He rambled that last bit out. His explanation made me snort. It was true though.

"Well.. if you know, then what's all this about my crush?" and I accentuated the crush with making parentheses in the air. He blushed again, although he still looked very calm.

"I kind of overheard you talking with Lea and Amber the other day.." At that moment I dropped my juice. It splashed all over the floor and I felt really terrible. Not only did I make a complete ass out of myself I'd _also_ just been told that Chris knew that I had a crush. On him. _Fanfuckingtastic great. _

"GOD! I'm sorry! Fuck look at this mess!" I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up.

"It's alright. If anyone knows anything about being clumsy, it's me. Here, just let me get you a towel or something. I'll be right back." And with that he disappeared in his bathroom.

This gave me a minute to think about what just happened. What did Chris tell me? He knew about the crush I had. He heard me talking to Amber and Lea. He must have heard it was about him. Why else would he be so upset. And _fuck_ that's the reason why he was so distant the other day! If that wasn't confirmation about the fact that he would _never _feel for me that way, I didn't know what was. He probably hated me. He must. _So why would he be here, with you, laughing with you, if he hated you?_ Wait. That's true. _Or maybe he's just looking for a way to make you fall on your ass so he can laugh at you and forget you. You're so not worth his time.._ Shut up! Shut the hell up! Chris wasn't like that. _He _is_ an actor.._ Did Chris really pretend to be my best friend again so he could just.. dump me like that?

"Dare?" I heard his voice and felt my eyes water. I didn't know what was going on with me, but I really needed to leave this trailer. It was just so _full_ of Chris and things I wanted to, needed to, longed to, but never could get. Never meeting his eyes I went to the door.

"I really need to go, I just remember I had a Skype meeting with Joey, he's probably waiting for me. See you tomorrow! I.. yeah.. Bye"

And then I was off, not really knowing where I was going. I did hear his yell "Darren! Wait!" but I chose to ignore it. My head was a mess. Chris' floor was a mess. I probably looked like a mess too _and_ I felt terrible. All I could see was Chris.. his always color changing eyes, his kissable mouth, his amazing legs, and his adorable nose. When I was in scenes with him I was always in awe of the many things he could do, show, and let me feel with just his expressions. He was stunningly beautiful. He was adorable, with his geeky ways, his love for his sister and his devotion for his friends. When he fought for other kids that experienced the same things in life he did, he was so fierce, so full of devotion that it just took my breath away. He had accomplished so many things in his still young life, that I would never be good enough for him. And wasn't that just it? Even _if _Chris would _ever _feel something for me, I wouldn't be good enough. And with that realization I crashed down. I didn't even know where I was, but I was sobbing so hard my vision was blurred and I felt my heart throbbing in my ears.

_I wish nothing but the best for you_

__**AN: Dramaaaa. I know! It'll become happier again, I promise! Chewbacca is also coming! But that's in.. chapter 8 I think :)  
>Pleeeeease review! Thank you so much guys! <strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: Do not own Darren or Chris. I just own the muddled brain :)**

**AN: Hey guys! I feel like I'm repeating myself again and again, but I just have to say thank you. This story keeps getting followers and sometimes it's a bit hard to believe for me! I also want to say thanks to the people who actually reviewed! God, you make my day! Please keep doing it! :) **

**Chapter 6**

-Chris-

What a _great _way to start my evening. Getting kissed on the cheek, getting _checked out_ by Darren, also known as the sexiest man of the year _and _then there was _that _look of course. That look that just screamed 'I don't know how you feel about me and what I'm doing to you by acting this way'. Prick. Well if that didn't make me feel like just a friend.. I really hated the fact that we had a fight the day before. Even though we already had spoken to each other again, I still felt a bit guilty about it. So I decided to apologize.

"I'm sorry for being so tense the other day." His eyes went up to my face and it was like something literally _melted _in there. I decided to give him his drink first, because I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to leave my seat, when it was right next to him.

"It's no big deal," he answered. "I just.." His eyes went back to me again and he looked at me like I was the only one in the room. Which I was of course, but he looked like nothing else matters.

"I was really worried you know? I care about you.. a lot." Why did he also _sound_ like nothing else mattered but me? He really shouldn't sound like that. He also shouldn't let those huge brown eyes look that way at me, because my little shattered heart was shattering even more. Just as always, I was misreading his intentions. Because he had a crush on someone else, the aching in my heart reminded me of that like every single second. Deciding I had nothing to lose, I asked him. Maybe it would hurt _less_ when I knew who the mysterious girl was. When he played like he didn't know what I was talking about, I decided to use the interview as an excuse. He was interrupting me, but I decided I should _really _say the next thing, because it would make him remember something about his former crushes, _and _it would give him a hint of what was wrong with me yesterday.

Of course the jerk needed to start singing when I used words he had written for a song once. _Prat_. I should probably thank him though, because I was about to say something he _really _shouldn't know. His singing did make me laugh. He just sounded so goddamn cheesy and cheerful. _Damn. _Did he just ask me what I meant earlier? _Act casual Chris! You can do that! _But before I knew it, he interrupted me. Again.

"Chris! I do not like Dianna! Oh no that's not true. I do like Dianna. I just don't _like_ like her, you know?" Despite of the awkward subject, I couldn't help but tease him at his choice of words. Meanwhile I was hoping that my face didn't show the inward happy dance I was doing, because he just acknowledged that Dianna wasn't his crush.

"Five and a half I guess," he mumbled softly and blushed. _He blushed! _God, it made him even sexier. He explained the situation of the interview and I immediately understood him. And of course I could always count on my stumbling words about a girlfriend.

"Well.. if you know, then what's all this about my crush?" he asked and at that moment I regretted my earlier words. I shouldn't have asked! _ Fool! _ _And for god sakes, why did I _always_ have to blush like I was twelve!_ Big brown eyes with little golden flecks were staring deeply in mine. I couldn't lie to him, he would notice it right away. So I confessed my eavesdropping. And then everything happened really fast. Darren dropped his drink, jumped up, cursed and looked kind of freaked out. Smiling softly I laid my hand on his shoulder.

"It's alright. If anyone knows anything about being clumsy, it's me!" I reassured him. "Here, just let me get you a towel or something. I'll be right back."

Wandering through my bathroom I found only dirty towels. That really wouldn't do.. Maybe Darren had some clean towels in his trailer? "Dare?" I yelled and walked back to my 'living room'.

He looked up at me like a dear that was caught in headlights. He rushed something out about a Skype meeting and Joey, before I knew it he was gone.

"Darren! Wait!" I yelled after him, but he simply ran away. What the hell just happened? Did I do something wrong? Did he see something that literally made him run away?

I let my eyes scan the room. The only thing that would show my real feelings towards Darren and let him freak out was my browsing history on my laptop, but it was turned off, so that couldn't be it. What could it be then? What were we talking about before he ran off like that?

Right.

We were talking about his crush. What was the last thing I said before his drank fell? Then I suddenly knew why he ran away like that. I confessed that I heard him talking about his new love and he must have felt uncomfortable about it. Why else would he run away like that?

That must be it. He wasn't the first. The few friends I had when I was at high school also didn't really want to talk about their girlfriends _or _boyfriends, because they thought I didn't really know how that felt. Or maybe the girls were afraid that I would steal their guy away or something. Which was stupid really, because even though I sounded like a girl, I didn't look like one, so I really couldn't snatch them away like that.

Plopping down on my couch I felt the tears gathering in my eyes. It wasn't the first time that this happened, but it just happened with Darren. _Darren. _The guy who embraced me like I was his long lost friend when I first met him.

The guy that bought me dinner that day too. The man who never left my side through all my drama and hysteria that I lived through the last year. The perfect friend who was always so _open_ and _unprejudiced_, I never felt like I should act like somebody else when I was with him. I didn't feel like I was different. I didn't feel like 'the gay kid'. There never was a big pink elephant in the room, when it was just me and Darren. And just like that, all of that changed.

All of it changed just because I was so stupid as to mention that stupid thing. I really thought he was different. I really thought our friendship was different. That he didn't care that I was gay. That it would never come between us. But then again, I screwed it all up, and not by what I just said. No. I screwed it _all _up by falling in love with him. And with that realization I crashed down. I _fucked up_ the _best _thing that has _ever_ happened to me, because I couldn't just _like_ my best guy friend, no I just _had_ _to fall in_ _love_ with him. And he would never. Ever. Love me back. Not like that. It felt like knives were stabbing me. Crumbling down on my couch I listened to the sounds of my pathetic weeping. _He's better off without you. It's for the best he's got a crush on someone else. You'll never be good enough. Because you. Are. A. Boy._

_**I guess she gave you things, I couldn't give to you**_

**AN: Ahh these two. Why don't they just tell eachother way they're thinking! Ah wel.. what fun would that be? They will tell though. Eventually..**

**Feel free to leave questions or suggestions! I'm open for other peoples perspectives in this story!**

_**Next chapter: Darren (and his brain) trying to figure out what to do**_

_**ThankyouGleeker1985 [L]**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I own my mobile phone, my laptop and my fantasy :D That's all**

**AN: Well hello! Once again, thank you for reading and staying with me! :) I adore you all! And thank you guys for reviewing! Especially those who are being specific in what they like and what they want! I really like that and try to use the ideas :) o up to the next chapter! :)**

**Chapter 7**

- Darren -

I didn't know how much time had passed before I found myself in my trailer again. I also didn't quite know how I'd gotten there, but I was glad I was inside. What if someone had seen me like that? For a moment I had been really scared that Chris would follow me, but he hadn't. Maybe he didn't even care. Maybe he didn't notice that I lied and truly believed that I had a meeting. Thinking about Chris actually hurt, so I decided to distract myself.

One quick look in my mirror showed everything that happened this evening. I looked like crap. Crying really didn't make my eyes look prettier. God, how could I even work like this tomorrow? Splashing water on a washcloth, I wiped my face clean. It didn't help at all. My eyes were bloodshot and puffy. My cheeks looked shabby and my hair was all over the place. Stepping in the shower, I let my thoughts drift away again. So Chris probably knew about my crush on him. He couldn't feel the same way about me, even though the girls said he must have had feelings for me too. Hell, _they _shipped us harder then _I_ shipped us.

A soft smile made his way to my lips. Everyone was just so nice in here, sometimes I still thought they couldn't be real. And that just brought me back to Chris _again_. Because he and our friendship _were_ real and I was really scared that I messed everything up. Thankfully the hot water was soothing my nerves and made me see things clearer. Even if Chris didn't return my feelings, we had been friends before all of this. The _best_ friends and if I couldn't have Chris as an.. well let's not go there, because I really didn't know what the appropriate description would be, but if Chris couldn't be _that _in my life, I would still need him as a friend. So, when I saw him tomorrow I would apologize for leaving like that and I would try my very best to get him to be my friend again. It was going to awkward first I guessed, but I was sure we could make it.

Closing the shower faucet I stepped outside the hot cabin. There's nothing a good shower couldn't fix. _Liar_. Yeah okay. My chest still ached and my head was full of what ifs, but now I knew I should really just focus on getting Chris to me by friend again. And how hard could that be?

_Very_.

Shut up.

_No. You hurt Chris and you can't just walk to him tomorrow and say 'Hi! Ready to do this scene? I can't wait!'. That's just not cool. _

Okaay. Then what?

_You have to make it up to him._

And how do I do that?

_You've got a whole night to figure it out. Good luck._

Having a conversation in your own head did actually help sometimes. Sitting down on my couch I grabbed a notepad. There was an unfinished song on there that just screamed _'Write me!'_, but I decided that the song had to wait. It probably wasn't that good anyway. Here, the last two sentences I wrote down were '_Even when you're just awake, gruffly and barely there. I still think you're the cutest thing and that just isn't fair. God._ Was I drunk when I wrote that? I must have been! Picking up a pencil, I thought about ways to make up with Chris.

_Ways to make up with Chris_

There. It was a start. I was ticking the pencil on the table in a familiar tune, meanwhile thinking of solutions.

_First: Say sorry._

Probably not the most original, but it should be the essence of whatever I was going to do.

_Second: Serenade him._

No way. It would scare the hell out of him!

_Third: Give him puppy eyes._

That's probably a good one! Ha! He could _never_ resist the puppy eyes.

And then it suddenly hit me. Tomorrow we would get to play Blaine and Kurt. Chris and I sometimes stayed in character and let them talk about everyone else of the crew. Chris always let Kurt criticize everyone's outfit and I always let Blaine be extra dapper and would flirt quite a lot with Kurt.

_Fourth: Make Blaine talk about me and Chris._

Yeah. That would be my totally awesome plan. In character it would be easier to talk with him and of course I could also include the puppy eyes in that. Blaine used them too. They just worked! I stood up and decided to take one last walk outside before I went to bed. My head was a bit full and fresh air always helped with that.

When I stepped outside, I got a sense of déjà vu. An Adele song was flowing softly through the air again.

_I'm tired of trying  
>Your teasing ain't enough<br>Fed up of biding your time when I don't get nothing back  
>And for what<br>And for what  
>And for what<br>__When I don't get nothing back  
>Boy I'm tired<em>

_Where'd you go when you stay behind  
>I looked up and inside<br>Down and outside  
>Only to find a double taking<br>Punching hard and laughing at my smile  
>I get closer<br>You obviously prefer her_

I didn't recognize the song, but I could clearly understand the words. It made me frown and question the events of the whole day. Hell of the whole two last days. Should I go to Chris and just try to talk? No, that probably wouldn't be a good idea, seeing that I was the one that run away like a maniac last time we tried that. Maybe he was just listening to music. Or maybe not. Walking back I decided my plan would be a perfect opportunity to talk about this too, because maybe someone _did _break Chris his heart, and maybe Blaine would get Kurt to talk about it.

_Blackbird singing in the dead of night  
>Take this bro-<em>

My hand slammed on my phone. Stupid alarm. Oh and yeah. Chris was my wake up call. So? It was a soft song that just made me wake up calmly. Okay, so maybe not just right now,,,but most of the time.. So what day was it today?_ You are going to make it up with Chris today!_ Ah! Yes, I knew that. Grinning like an idiot I jumped out of bed. This day was going to be awesome!

**AN: So! What do you think? Let me know! I know Darren suddenly is all happy and hyper again in here, but honestly? I really think Darren is a bit like this.. Positive minded at least :) And don't worry, we'll get him angst and jealous again ;) But we have to have some happy times too, don't we? **


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: Darren & Chris are not mine.. :(**

**AN: Is my thanking you getting bored? Because I really feel like I should keep doing it! I hope you enjoy this chapter..**

**Chapter 8**

- Chris -

Just like every emotionally stable guy or girl, by now my tears were transfigured into an angry frown. Who the hell did Darren think he was? He fucking _knew _I was gay and yet he is so goddamn _touchy _all the time. There never was a day he wouldn't hug me, touch me, hell even _kissed _me. He _should_ know that is really insensible to do to a guy who is, in fact, attracted to other guys. Why did he do it then? To punish me? To make fun of me? Just for the thrill of it? Hell, no wonder he was nominated by that sexiest man crap. If you seduce men _and_ woman you'll get twice as many votes! And isn't that just convenient? He even had _me_ wrapped around his little finger in _no _time with all this crap he said!

"_I'm so lucky to work with golden globe winning actor.."_

"_Just the fact that I get to call him a colleague is the coolest feeling I ever had "_

"_Wow Chris I love you! I never met anybody at work that knows about my other life!"_

"_This good looking man?"_

"_He doesn't go by numbers, he gets hieroglyphics."_

"_I was consumed by my love with Chris Colfer"_

"_It could happen. Never say never"_

_Damn him and his stupid adorable words. _

Not that I ever watched all those YouTube videos about the comments he made of me. Nuh uh. I did _not_ do that. I personally blame Ashley. I mean she sends me links like that _all_ the time.

Hell if I looked now, she probably would have sent me one again. Maybe even one about the 'girls and boys' comment. It did really suck he said that. Because it gave this stupid boy _hope_. That's it. I have to let this anger and _nerve-wracking hurt_ out! In two seconds I had a playlist with Adele and I stood in the middle of my room, dancing and singing it all out.

_But there's a side to you, that I never knew, never knew  
>All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true<br>And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win._

I sang out loudly, not for once caring about someone might hear me. At this moment it was just me and my best friend Adele. She knew _exactly_ how I felt, and to be able to sing it out like this, well it was like magic. Therapists should be fired and Adele should be hired! And the worst of all is that Darren actually _meant_ those things. He meant _all_ of it, but just in a friendly way. I've seen him with his other friends from Starkids and with them he is even worse! So why did I ever think it meant something more when he was with _me_? When 'Tired' came on, I braced myself. This one was going to get out on the top of my lungs. Just for the feel of it.

_God_, that felt good. The huge weight that was resting on my heart and shoulders was lifted, only if it was just a little. Glancing at my clock I decided I really should get some sleep. Tomorrow would be a tough day. Not just because we had a hell of a schedule, but also because I get to see Darren again. And we had to act like we were in love. Heck we even had to sing a duet, while acting all lovey-dovey. Well, I was an actor. I could do that.

_Saay, wasn't that a funny day?  
>Gee you had a funny way<br>A way about you  
>A kind of glow of something neeew<em>

I really should change my alarm song, but I couldn't help but waking up calmly when I heard Darren sing softly, while he was strumming his guitar. For me, who was such a morning person - _not!_ – it was almost as good as being woken up with breakfast or something equally pleasant.

Tossing the blankets aside I decided I could snooze for like.. five minutes. The blankets were my security for not falling asleep, because I would get too cold anyway. Today would probably start weird. I could just imagine seeing Darren walk up to me and act like nothing ever happened. Well, maybe I should just go with that. I didn't really know what to do anymore.

If I said sorry, he would get the affirmation that he had the right to run away. And if I was to ask him why he had run away, he maybe would tell me that he just didn't want to be _that_ close to me to start talking about relationships and everything. It was probably the best to just leave it to Darren. First.. breakfast!

When I finished my PB & J sandwich I heard a knock on my door. It was too early for being called to set already, so wondering who it would be I opened up my door. There was no one there, but on the top of my stairs stood a Starbucks coffee cup. Looking around I still didn't see anyone. Who just brought me coffee? Bending over, I picked it up. It was still warm! I couldn't help but smile. Whoever brought me this, was my personal hero. I _really_ needed some coffee. And this was just the _best_ coffee there was. "Thank you oh mysterious coffee delivery boy! Or girl! Or.. 'it''!" I said out loud and took one last look around. I heard a muffled snort somewhere, but before I knew it was all quiet again. Well. If this mysterious person wanted to stay incognito, it was okay. I would find out anyway.

So far this day started pretty good.

"I actually like my outfit today! You think I can keep it?" I asked Miranda, who was just finishing my hair.

"Sure hun, the only thing _you_ have to do is bat your eyelashes at Ryan!"

I tried to give her a menacing glare, but Kevin and Cory actually laughed at me.

"You act like he is in love with me!" I said with a chuckle.

"Never say never!" she only said what made me role my eyes. _Girls._.

"All done!"

"Thanks! I like it," I said and smiled. Secretly I was thankful that I looked good today. Because I wasn't sure if I could have a serious conversation with Darren when I was wearing something like that Return of the Jedi outfit I wore a couple of weeks ago.

My hand was still on the doorknob when someone yanked it open. _Hard_. Before I knew it I was toppling forwards, only to be stopped by a very warm and _hard_ chest.

_Darren_.

"Wow there tiger!" he said with a grin and carefully put me back on my feet. My heart was beating so hard, I could have sworn he heard it.

"Are you okay Chris?" he asked, suddenly worried and put his hand on my shoulder. I backed down and nodded.

"Yeah," I said and now heard how _breathless _my voice sounded. "I'm fine," I tried to say with more confidence.

"Okay! But Chris! I was looking for you!" he said and actually started bouncing up and down. How could be so _childish _and _sexy_ at the same time? It just wasn't fair.

"What for?" I asked him and moved closer. Today was probably going to be the day of surprises, because he slid his hand in mine and pulled me outside without uttering a single word.

**AN: Well there you go! What did you think? I like to write bitchy Chris, haha. Thank you guys for reviewing! I really like it when you give your opinion or help me with new ideas.. I try to use them all if I can :) **

_Next chapter will involve a certain giant furry animal which all the CrissColfer fans know :) _


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: If anyone knows a way for actually owning Fox, Glee, Darren _and _Chris, please let me now in a private message, because I want to! I really do!**

**AN: Well hello my lovelies! Can I just say you guys make some awesome reviews? I love them! I really like to read what you really think about it and everything :) And I need to especially thank a few people.. **

**Thanks Gleeker1985 for being the awesome Beta that you are! I like being the Finn to your Kurt, haha  
><strong>**Thanks My Bad Bella for reviewing again and again! You're the best!  
>Thanks Avva for your awesome review! I loved it<br>****And last but not least..**

**Thanks Darren and Chris for giving us Perfect.. Just.. Guh..**

**Sooooo... When I saw the Chewbacca photo's on Tumblr I just knew I had to use that in my story, so here you go!**

**Chapter 9**

- Darren -

Looking at my watch I noticed I had enough time to get some _real _coffee. On my way to Starbucks I thought about what I was going to get. It was a holiday season, so maybe they would have some very nice seasonal coffee's. I'll admit it. I'm a coffee junkie. Blaine is just like me in that area.

- - - - - –

Walking out with two fresh cups of Gingerbread Latte's I went to my car. Yes, I brought one for Chris. Today was make up day, remember? And what better way to start such a day then bringing him a lovely cup of the most delicious coffee _ever_? At least that's what I thought. So when I finally was home again - when did I start to call it home?- I went straight to Chris' trailer. Knocking a sound of music tune I quickly put the coffee down. I wanted to see his reaction without seeing me, so I hastily hid myself behind a bush.

His door opened and he looked around. The surprise on his face when he saw no one, made me full all fuzzy inside. God, I was such a child sometimes! But when Chris was involved, everything was allowed. Slowly he bent over to pick it up. A soft outtake of breath left my lips. _God. _Why did he look so _flexible _and _captivating _while only doing something as simple as bending over? The world really wasn't fair. At all.

His voice brought me out of my thoughts.

"Thank you oh mysterious coffee delivery boy!" His voice sounded amused and happy, which made me smile.

"Or girl! Or.. it!" he now said, sounding even more amused, but now by himself. Even though I put my hand on my mouth, the snort still was audible. _Shit_. But Chris only smiled his tightlipped smile and closed the door again. A relieved sigh escaped my lips. So far, so good!

- - - - - –

When I walked back to my own trailer, I decided I could go ahead on to set already. I was finished and that way I could read through my lines one more time. I never knew why everybody always wrote that I was always fashionably late, because I wasn't! Really!

"Darren! Good to see you!" I heard a familiar voice say. Turning around I saw Ian walking towards me. His face seemed a bit off though. His grin was just too wide and his eyes too knowing. Suddenly I felt a bit nervous. He looked exactly liked that when he told me Kurt and Blaine were going to kiss. Or when he told us Kurt and Blaine were going to do _the deed._ Which really was an insult if you asked me. The 'deed' didn't do any justice to everything the love making between those two really was. But I was in a conversation, wasn't I?

"Good to see you too! What's up?"

"We have a surprise for you guys today.." he said mysteriously and wiggled his eyebrows a little. Okay, he shouldn't do that. It looked.. weird.

"And what's that?" I asked excited and a bit apprehensive. What could it possibly be? "I'm going to have a threesome with Kurt and Sebastian?" _Fuckfuckfuck_. Did I _really_ just _say_ that?

_You pervert!_

Well.. if anything, Ian looked a bit.. caught off guard. I throw out a forced laugh, to make the tension go away. Thankfully it worked. Ian laughed too.

"You got me there Dare! But anyway. We brought someone to set today, because it's going to be in the episode, but I just _know_ you and Chris are absolutely going to adore it." And with that he walked away.

"Are you going to show me?" I asked his retreating back.

"Yeah! Come on!" he said while turning his head over his shoulder. Happily I ran after him. Now I _really _couldn't wait. We were zigzagging though the set for a good ten minutes, before I just couldn't wait anymore.

"Iaaaan. Come on just tell me!" And then there it was. If someone took a photo of me I would probably look like a cartoon character. Wide open eyes, jaw on the ground and frozen on the spot. Ohmgodohmygodohmygod. _Oh. My. God. _I was just eye in eye with Chewbacca. As in the real Chewbacca. As in a very huge, fluffy, _real_ Chewbacca! I could officially die right now as a happy man.

"Oh my god!" I said and now my voice sounded almost as high pitched as Chris'.

"Yeah, you said that like five times now.." Ian laughed. Oh. I said that out loud?

"But.. It's.. Chewbacca!" I spluttered out.

"No! Really?" Ian just laughed and walked off again. I still stood still and just stared. And then something happened I found a bit frightening but awesome at the same time. Chewbacca laughed. He actually _laughed. _

"Oh my god," I said again and was finally able to move.

"Are you going to stay here for a while? Because my friend has a backpack of you and he's going to freak out when he sees you! I must go and get him. _Please_ stay!" I rambled and gave Chewbacca my puppy eyes. Chewbacca only nodded and waved. Jumping up and down I ran off. Chris was going to _love_ this.

"Ian!" I yelled loudly and looked around. His face appeared and he shot me a questioning look.

"Do you know where Chris is?"

"Make up, I think?" he said as he went back to work. Busy guy. Okay. Make up trailer, here I come!

Yanking open the door I was shocked to suddenly have my arms full of Chris. Not that I minded. God, he felt good there. Just here in my arms. His breath against my neck really shouldn't feel that good though, that should be illegal.

"Wow there tiger!" I said with a laugh and tried to steady him again. Now he was on his feet again I could actually see his face. He _also_ looked a bit off, but I couldn't really tell what his face read.

"Are you okay Chris?" I asked him, worriedly.

"Yeah," he said and nodded. Why did he sound like he just ran a marathon?

"I'm fine." Well. Okay, but there was something waiting for us!

"Okay! But Chris! I was looking for you!"

"What for?" he asked and came a bit closer. Before he knew it I had his hand in mine and was dragging him across the set. It felt a bit like the first scene we were in, although this wasn't Kurt and Blaine. This was very much Chris and Darren.

_Sounds good together_.

I thought so too!

_ChrisCriss doesn't sound good though_.

Shut up.

"Dare?" his voiced cut through my thoughts. I stopped running and turned around, still holding his hand.

"Yeah?" I asked a bit breathless.

"Where are we going? And why are we running? I'm really just out of makeup and if my hair is ruined already, Ryan is going to kill me." He looked adorable when he looked flustered and just a tiny bit irritated.

"You'll see! Just wait" I said and walked down the hallway of McKinley. I really loved the fact that although yesterday was a very weird day for me and Chris, we still were so at ease with each other, because we both knew we would talk about it eventually. Standing at the end of the hallway I turned around. Chris was looking a bit bored actually, but he wouldn't be any more in a few seconds.

"Come here," I said and motioned to him.

"Nah ah I'm not going to do that anymore. The last time you said that and I actually listened to you, I was attacked by your hot mouth. Not going to happen Criss." He said and laughed.

"So you think my mouth is hot?" I asked and raised my eyebrow at him. His cheeks reddened a bit, but he gave nothing away. Ah, there it was. The roll of eyes. He should really ask for a patent on that, because he really mastered that particular expression.

"Good to know," I said and smirked. "Now come here, no kisses, I promise." Did he just looked.. _disappointed? _Nah, probably just imagined that. He walk the two steps that were between us and looked down expectantly.

"Well?" I let go of his hand, a bit reluctantly, and stepped aside, so I was behind Chris. Sliding my hand over his eyes, I tried to ignore the feelings it made me feel inside. This wasn't about that. This was about two friends doing something awesome. I felt him stiffen, because his back was right against my chest, but it was probably just the surprise.

"Dare?" he asked, a bit uncertain.

"I'll watch out for you. Now walk, it's very nearby!" I said enthusiastically, giving him a little boost by pushing my chest to his back.

"I hate surprises. But I trust you" he said and tried to walk while flailing his arms around for balance.

_I trust you_.

Hearing that my heart speed up and thankfully he couldn't see my blinding smile that came just because he said that. Seeing Chewbacca I stopped.

"Okay. We're here!"

"Yes, we're in the auditorium. Now, can I have my sight back?" he said although I could hear the amused tone.

"Don't freak out." I just said and took my hands away.

Chris blinked and looked at me first. My grinning face gave nothing away, so he turned around. Then he almost lost his balance when he saw the reason we ran from his room.

"Ohmygodohmyohmygod!" he almost screamed. _My thoughts exactly! _

"I KNOW!" I said happily and took his hand again, dragging him along to Chewbacca.

"Should I bow?" he murmured, probably to himself which made me laugh.

"No, he's not royal. He's just totally awesome!" I said, bouncing again.

""But..My God! It's.. Chewbacca!" He sounded just as flabbergasted as I sounded when I saw him. He looked like Christmas came early. _He_ took my breath away.

"Dare?" I heard him ask with a hint of uncertainty.

"Hmm?" Did I miss something? I was a bit.. distracted.

"Did he just laugh?" he asked very softly. To prove his point, he laughed again.

"Oh. My. God. ILoveRyan. Can I touch you?" he rushed out and was also bouncing up and down now.

"Sure," the Chewbacca said. Hey. Chewbacca's didn't say that! But Chris obviously didn't care, because he was stretching his arm out and softly let his fingers stroke the fur.

"It's so fluffy I'm gonna die!" he squeaked. Seriously. Could I have a better friend than this? A friend who was just as nerdy as I was? Someone who quoted Disney more than me? Someone who was just as into animated movies as me? A guy who looked like _this_ because he just saw a fictional character on his work where he was like the greatest star? There was only one answer. _No._

**AN: Whieeee Chewbacca in tha house! Gosh, I loved to write this! I like fluffy scenes, haha. Just as much as dramatic feelings scenes though, so you just got to bear with me all the way, hehe. Let me know what you think and what you want! I always reply!**

**Thanks for reading!**

_Next chapter: Chris his perspective on Chewbacca and the start of a good talk.. _


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: Hello lovelies! Here is another chapter :) I hope you'll like it. They get into role-playing now so that should be interesting :P**

**I just heard about the leaked scene from kurt/blaine/sebastian. And I got some comments about why I won't put that scene in my story. Well.. the thing is, it's probably shoot ages ago, so if I'd put it in now it won't be very realistic. But if you want to, I'm very willing to write it. So let me know what you think!**

**Here you go!**

**Chapter 10**

-Chris-

Has anyone ever died because they were so happy and excited that everything just felt like _too_ much? Because I really felt like that could be happening right _now_. My fingers were still stroking the fluffy fur of Chewbacca. I looked back at Darren. Immediately I was taken back by his expression. He looked.. he looked so.. happy? No, it was more than that. I couldn't quite put my finger on his expression, but it did look familiar on his face. Where had I seen that before? Before I could think about it some more, he noticed me staring at him. His lips moved but no words were coming out. He was probably just as thrilled as I was. Grinning I asked him

"Can I keep him?" He _and_ the Chewbacca laughed, which still made me feel a bit weird inside.

"I would say yes, but you've got to ask your fairy godmother about that I think," Darren said with a smirk.

"Okay, let's go find Ryan _now_!" I said and reluctantly let go of Chewbacca, which started to walk away. Apparently he had some important business to do. I couldn't help but stare after him. It was just so.. _unbelievably awesome_.

"You should see yourself," Darren said softly, but not with an amused undertone. He sounded more in _awe_ than anything else. His tone was the thing that made me turn around.

"Well I can't help it! It's Chewbacca Dare! Chewbacca! Like oh my god all my dreams came true in this last three years!" This made him smile even more.

"Yeah? Like what?" I rolled my eyes. Seriously?

"You mean like meeting Gwyneth, Kristin _and_ Idina? Hell even getting to _sing _with them! Singing on a freaking stage in New York? Being able to do something for children who are like me while meeting the right people so I could actually make my books and movies? Meeting Harry _freakin _Potter? Meeting _Chewbacca_?" I rushed out , not even covering everything..there was just too much that happened.

"Gosh, you sure have a lot on your bucketlist! Harry freaking Potter is overrated, you know that? Well at least you can scrape off '_Win a golden globe'_", he said nonchalantly. I shook my head lightly.

"Yeah, still not sure who Ryan paid to let that happen.." I wish I didn't sound so unsure, but maybe Darren didn't notice it. A warm hand placed it on my shoulder. So he did notice it. _Damn._

"Hey..Chris don't be like that," he said softly and squeezed my shoulder. I looked up and his puppy eyes bore right through me.

"You are an amazing guy! You are_ very_ talented, have a lovely voice, multitask more than a woman could, are ridiculously handsome, _and _you're my best friend. Reason enough to win a golden anything!" he said giving me a Darren-hug.

_Asshole. Always knows exactly what to say, doesn't he?_

_Wait.._

"Ridiculously handsome Dare? Really?" I shook my head. "You're gay is showing honey," I laughed and decided right there that we probably should head to set.

"I didn't say that," he said and even _I_ could hear his underlying tone. _Nervousness. _Darren really didn't make _any _sense today.

"Yes you did," I said and grabbed my script from my back pocket. "So, are we going to run some lines before we have to begin?"

"Sure!" he said grabbing his own script. Well. He tried. Seeing Darren grabbing his own ass, because he thought there would be a script there... which wasn't, was really too hilarious for this early in the morning.

"You're laughing at me!" he said and even had the air to look insulted. I only laughed harder. His pouting expression made me stop though.

"Argh, you and your goddamn lips! Stop pouting like that! You're twenty-four for god's sake!" I said and waved him off.

"Ca-." his voice sounded rough and he started his sentence again, looking a bit flustered. "Can I read with you then? Since I only have an imaginary script..?" he asked.

"Sure, come sit next to me," I said and patted the space next to me.

After doing the 'Let it snow' scene I walked to my trailer to change into something more comfortable. _Damn._ I loved Christmas and I loved doing scenes, but sometimes it really made me hurt like _everywhere_. Our choreography was just _ridiculous _sometimes! I didn't even know I was _that_ flexible. But apparently, I was. When I just took out a diet coke for myself my phone buzzed.

_Wanna run some lines? _

–_D_

I sighed. I really was tired, but I hadn't practiced either, so maybe it was a good idea..

_Sure. I already changed though, so you could do it too if you want. _

I replied laying down on my couch. No need to clean up, because it was just Darren, and besides I was pretty neat.

_Done. I bring some snacks :)_

–D

_Redvines?_

–_C_

_Duh. What can't they do? Be there in a minute!_

–_D_

Smiling I put my phone away. Was it really just yesterday when Darren took off and hurt me like that? It felt like weeks ago. Today had been such a blessing that I really couldn't believe it really happened. I couldn't help but freaked out again, while thinking about everything that happened. Yeah the whole cast moment with Chewbacca had been awesome, but this morning, being there alone with Darren, made it all the more special. We were both such geeks, we totally understood each other right then. It felt great.

"I would totally knock, but ehm, my hands are pretty full you know!" Darren said through my door. Jumping up, I opened up the door.

"Need a hand?" I asked and tried to take some of the things from his hands.

"No, I got it!" he said and then took two huge steps and dumped everything on my table.

"So.. how long are you going to stay here?" I said and looked pointedly at the huge pile of food that was currently there. Of course he only grinned.

"Until you kick me out!" he said letting himself fall down on my couch.

"Did you bring your script?" I asked him, not seeing it anywhere. His eyes suddenly went wide and he face palmed his self.

"Oh god I'm an idiot."

"Yes you are. Well, _that_ and you just want to cuddle up next to me on my couch. Just admit it." I said cynically.

"You know me so well Colfer," he said and moved closer to me.

_Ooookay. Not exactly what I had in mind! _

Not that I cared of course.

"Can you believe that we really saw Chewbacca today?" I asked excitedly.

"No! And I also can't believe they made it Artie's wish. I mean. Chewbacca is all _us _right?" Darren said with an offended tone. I turned towards him and put my feet under his leg. They were cold and he was warm.

"I know! But technically Blaine and Kurt aren't nerdy. At all. So it's probably more logical that it's Artie's wish. Kurt would probably only say something about his hideous fashion sense or something." Darren laughed and looked just as happy as I felt inside.

"True.. Although I would really like to get to know Blaine and Kurt better. I mean we know things, but if you think about my room. It's not Blaine at all, is it? It's all.. neat and gentleman like, but at the same time I'm dancing like a lunatic in there and talking with you about masturbation. It's just.. not compatible." My face must have showed my consensus.

"No, it's not! I think we'll see something of that later, because I don't think they made that whole set, just for one scene.. Although it was a very funny one. I hated that outfit, oh my god! I looked like an escaped animal or something!"

"More like extinct wildlife!" Darren laughed and was it just me or were we moving closer?

"I know! Who does that? I really think someone hates me in the costume design."

"There must be someone.. Although you actually rock every look you wear you know.." and he actually sounded sincere while saying that.

"You have no fashion sense at all" I stated.

"You neither."

We laughed and lent towards each other.

"Kurt?" his Blaine-voice suddenly asked me. Oh, so we were role-playing again? And _not_ in a dirty way, thank you very much.

"Hm?" I just said, and settled down, cuddling more to Darren now, because at this moment he was my boyfriend.

"I really liked our duet today," he said and moved his head upwards, so he could look at me from my shoulder.

"I did too. I love your voice you know," I said honestly. "Although your sweater was hideous. Did your grandma buy that for you?" It was quiet for two seconds.

"I don't even know if I have a grandmother!" Darren laughed out loud. I laughed with him.

"Oh and Blaine?" I said. He only hummed against my throat.

"Thanks for the coffee this morning."

"No problem," he said and suddenly stilled. "Shit! How did you know it was me?" he asked exaggeratedly.

"Because I know you honey, who else would buy me something that delicious?"

"You liked it then?" he asked looking very pleased when I nodded.

"Good. It was a part of a whole plan you know," he said and I suddenly looked a bit confused. He noticed, _of course he noticed, _and laid his hand on my knee.

"Kurt, relax. Nothing to worry about. I just helped a friend of mine because he felt like he needed to apologize." I tried to translate the role-play in our real life. Which was a bit hard to do at the moment. Because Darren was all around me, talking about moments between me and him, while staying in character.

_What a mindfuck! Inception was nothing compared to this_.

"So.. who is this friend of yours? Do I know him?" I asked in my Kurt voice, trying to sound a bit jealous and suspicious, because I honestly believed I couldn't do this talking about yesterday as myself...and maybe Darren knew. Maybe he knew that the running away hurt me, and instead of apologizing as himself, he tried to talk about it through Blaine. It would be something Darren would think off, even though it was a bit weird. But it was Darren nonetheless.

**AN: So next chapter will have Darren apologizing for running away. Well, I hope you guys still like it! Oh and let's give a great thank you to my love beta Gleeker1985 :) Love you hun!**


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: So up with chapter 11! You all reviewed that you wanted to see some talk.. Well, here it is! I hope you like it :)**

**Thanks for all your lovely reviews, especially the very lengthy ones! They make me very happy :)**

**Here you go!**

**Chapter 11**

Darren -

Today was such a weird day. Weird in a _freakin awesome_ and _embarrassing _way, though. It was awesome to meat Chewbacca and to witness Chris meeting him and being just.. Chris. But, that also was probably the most embarrassing part of it all. Chris _must_ have seen the looks I had given him. I mean, I tried! I really did.

_You're just a very bad actor, not your fault._

Come on, are you on my side or not?

_Eh, no? You're a bad actor _and_ can't even tell Chris you're sorry. So no._

I'm trying!

_Try harder_

Fine! But as I was saying. I really tried to be more 'friendly' than 'smitten' near him, but he just was so damn _Chris_ all the damn time, that I couldn't focus on acting 'normal'. And here I was, on Chris his couch, _again_, with a big pile of food and Chris sitting next to me.

"Did you bring your script?" Chris asked me suddenly, removing me from my thoughts.

"Oh god I'm an idiot."

_Hate to say I told you so. _

"Yes you are. Well, _that_ and you just like to cuddle up next to me on my couch. Just admit it." he said and smirked.

"You know me so well Colfer," I said trying to be a bit closer to him. Come on! Everyone knew I was a cuddler. I just like to touch people. It makes your friendships and relationships much more intimate.

We talked some more and eventually ended up talking about Kurt and Blaine. Yeah, I did that myself, but you remembered my awesome plan, right? In which Chris and I will be like Blaine and Kurt so I can _finally _apologize for being such an idiot? I'm working on that!

"Kurt?" I tried and only just now noticed how close he and I were. Holding my breath a little I hoped Chris would be in for this, even though there were no other crew members we could make fun off now.

"Hm?" he just said and moved even closer to cuddle me. My heart started beating just a tiny bit faster.

God, what do I say now?

_Compliment him. He's your boyfriend remember.._

Right!

"I really liked our duet today," I said and tried to look at him. I could never get enough of his eyes.

"I did too. I love your voice you know. Although your sweater was hideous. Did your grandma buy that for you?" I smiled at his sincere voice, but then his question actually made me think.

"I don't even know if I have a grandmother!" I said, making me and Chris laugh together.

"Oh and Blaine?" I made a sound that meant 'do continue', because I was too lazy and content to talk when I was _right _here, against his neck and on his shoulder.

"Thanks for the coffee this morning."

"No problem," my automatic reply was.

_Aaaargh, idiot!_

Damnit! How did he know that? I hid! Ah, he heard my snort, didn't he?

"Shit! How did you know it was me?" I asked, nevertheless.

"Because I know you honey, who else would buy me something that delicious?" I smiled, satisfied that he actually liked it.

This was it.

"Good. It was a part of a whole plan you know," I said now and tried to think about my next lines, when I noticed his face. He looked a bit anxious and confused. Great, make him feel stressed already, why don't you? Trying to calm him down, I placed my hand on his knee. It worked.

"Kurt, relax. Nothing to worry about. I just helped a friend of mine, because he felt like he needed to apologize." I could see him trying to figure it out. Even though he still stayed in character. No wonder he had won an Golden Globe, he was just _so _good! And he didn't even have a degree!

"So.. who is this friend of yours? Do I know him?" Chris said now, and he really sounded like Kurt right then. Jealous, anxious and haughty at the same time. And because he stayed in character that well, I tried to do that too, by being more Blaine than ever. Snuggling closer I grabbed his hand and tangled our fingers together.

"I think you do. You probably think he's an idiot though, so maybe you don't even want to remember him.. but he is close to me.." I started and swallowed, because my throat suddenly felt so dry. Chris just looked intently to me and nodded to keep me going.

"Yeah. So, it's Darren.." My head ducked down.

"Ah I remember him.. Goofy, kind of obsessed with nerdy things, addicted to redvines, has like six things in his wardrobe and is all kinds of touchy right?" Chris drawled and rolled his eyes.

_God, he _is _good._

Hate to say I told you so.

Trying to stay in character as well as Chris I only nodded with a light smile on my face.

"Yeah, that's him."

"What did he do now? Because if he ruined one of your bowties again, I _swear_!" Chris grumbled and squeezed my hand a little.

"No! No, nothing like that, I promise," I smiled. Chris knew what I wanted to talk about, but he made it so much easier by trying so hard to be _with_ me in this.

"Okay.. Then what?" he asked now, voice tinged with curiosity. I swallowed again.

"Well.. He had a friend over, Chris. You know him.. And well when Chris tried to tell him something, he ehm. Well he ran off."

Chris frowned and looked puzzled.

"Why would he do that?" And although he asked it in his Kurt-voice, I was pretty sure the question was all Chris. Hell, he deserved to know.

I sighed and leaned back, to give him some space and to give me some more room to actually _breathe_.

"Because he's an idiot as you know and.. He didn't mean it like that, but he just didn't know how to respond to what Chris had told him. Well at least that's what he told me.." I rambled. At first this whole idea seemed pretty solid, but actually it was a bit weird and confusing.

"What did Chris tell him then? Because if it hurt him or made him feel weird or something, I'm sure Chris didn't mean it like that." Chris said now looking genuinely concerned.

"No he didn't say anything like that.." I said and tried to think of what to do next. Because really, I didn't even _know_ exactly what Chris _had _heard when he heard me talking to Lea and Amber.. Maybe that's where I must be going then..

"Did Chris tell you that he heard Darren talk to Amber and Lea? Because Darren told me it had something to do with that.." I asked and mentally gave myself a thumbs up, because that question was pretty solid. Chris looked a bit stricken now and I suppressed the feeling to give the role play up and run away again.

_Courage Darren_, my inner-Blaine whispered.

"Ehm. I think he mentioned something like that. But at the time I was pretty invested in my newest edition of Vogue, so I don't know really.." His cheeks were slightly red and his answer pretty much screamed 'I don't want to talk about it!'. But it really was too late to back off now.

"Kurt.." He let go of my hand then and took a shaky breath. God, he _knew_. He fucking _knew _and he probably didn't want to even _think_ about me liking him that way..

"Well he said that.. He said that he heard him talk about his newest crush." Chris fixated his stare at the mountain of food that still lay there untouched.

So he heard me talking about my crush.

"And?" I pushed and looked intently at his face. If only I could _read _him!

"And? Well. I'm not sure, he wasn't _that_ open, but I think he is just really worried about him. Because you know the last time he had a crush on someone, he got really hurt and he didn't want him to be like that again. He patched him up last time you know.." Chris said with a defensive tone.

Am I missing something here or did Chris only hear me talking about my newest crush and heard no name? So he was just .. worried?

"Yeah, I remember," I just said and tried to grab Chris his hand again, because it _really _meant a lot what Chris had done for him then. Although he looked hesitant, he didn't fight my enfolding fingers.

"Chris?" I asked, because I just couldn't do it anymore.

"I'm sorry for eavesdropping Dare, I really am! I just.. I was just standing there you know. And I heard you talking so happily and I remembered it was just like the last time. You thought she was _it_ then, but turned out she wasn't and she really broke your heart that day. I remember your broken figure so well it sometimes still gives me nightmares, you know? I just felt bad." He said as himself now and looked frustrated and even angry, but I couldn't quite tell at _whom_.

"You-"

"No, hear me out now. And then I told you about it and you ran! You fucking ran Dare! And it hurt so much! Because I know it's because I'm gay and all of that." I frowned at that. What the hell was he talking about? But he continued anyway.

"I had it happen before you know. Sometimes I was best friends with someone, well at least it felt like that, and then he got himself a girlfriend and I was dumped. Just like that, because they always thought I didn't know how it felt, and they thought they couldn't talk about their girlfriends to me because, hey you're gay, so what do _you_ know about girls? And I'm used to it, really. But with you.." He sighed frustrated and dragged his hand through his hair.

Every fiber in me wanted to close the distance between us and hug him, because _GOD_ he was so _so_ wrong! I halted myself though, because it seemed like he wasn't done yet.

"After the whole Mia-affair, it just hurt. Because _you_ said I was the only one you could talk to at the time and I thought we accomplished something together. I never felt like 'the gay kid' with you, you know? And you running away like that, like you were afraid of me or something.. Or disgusted.." his voice was a soft whisper by now, and now I couldn't hold myself back.

Folding Chris in my arms, I ignored his surprised intake of air.

"God Chris.." I said and even _I_ heard the pent-up emotions in my voice.

"I'm so sorry. I'm _so .. _I'm an idiot! I know that! But _god _you're so wrong!" Chris tried to get out of my death grip by now. Actually I wasn't willing to let him go yet, but I probably should. So I did, reluctantly.

"..What do you mean?" he asked looking up at me quizzically.

Letting my head fall in my hands I shook my head slightly. God, how was I supposed to get myself out of this?

"I wasn't afraid like that.." I looked up at him again, in his teary ocean color eyes. "And I will never. Ever. Be disgusted. With you. Okay?" I said trying to let my sincerity shine through my eyes as our eyes met.

Chris only nodded and looked so young at that moment.

"I screwed up big time, didn't I?" Chris still looked dazed and worried.

"Why did you run away then?"

_Time to run again?_

I knew then, that if I did that, things would be over for always. And thinking about a life _without_ snarky Chris Colfer in it, didn't seem appealing at all. So I stayed on the couch, connected with Chris by hands.

"I was just being stupid." I said honestly. "I thought.. Look Chris, when you heard me talking to Lea and Amber it was after a rather.. extreme interrogation that I had to spill my guts out. I didn't want to tell them, hell I didn't want to tell it to anyone, because I'm sure that _said_ crush will never return my feelings that way. So when you said you also heard me talking about that, I got reminded of that I think I just got scared or something. I felt sad, like really sad and basically cried my heart out that evening.."

Chris looked at me, trying to deter if I was speaking the truth or not. But the sincerity in my eyes must have given me away, because he suddenly looked apologetic.

"Oh Dare.. What girl in her right mind wouldn't return your feelings? You're the best catch running around! Hell, bouncing around! Just take one look at Tumblr, and you can see how many times people curse you for being so damn attractive, sweet, down to earth and humble. And they're right, you know! You really shouldn't think so little of yourself, because you are a great guy!" Finishing his speech he looked a bit embarrassed, but he smiled nevertheless.

_You're the best catch running around_ echoed in my head and I think I looked pretty dumbfounded then.

"Don't look at me like that! You know I look at guys differently than you, and let me tell you..." He laughed and giving me an approving look that made my cheeks even redder than before.

I just choked on a nervous laugh and tried to ignore the stroking of Chris his thumb.

"We'll see.. But Chris?" I asked, trying to ignore the fluttering feeling in my stomach that came from his dopey smile.

"Yeah Dare?"

"Are we okay again?"

"Yes we are.. Sorry for doubting you. I'm just a tiny bit insecure sometimes you know? I'm not used to having friends like you. Hell I'm still not used to having friends at _all_."

And the sad part of everything is the fact that he meant that. He never had friends, close friends, real friends. Friends like me. And with that I decided to try to ignore all my feelings for him, because the thing Chris needed the most right now was a friend. And just being friends with him, was something I _ could_ and _would_ do.

**AN; So :) They're okay again! Let me know what you think!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: Still don't own a thing that has to do with this story. I do own the words though because I made it up.. Does that count for something?**

**AN:**

**It's a beautiful daaaaay, the wiiiind is blowing. I feeeel cold, but I loooove your reviews, cause they make me warm insiiiide!**

**So. I'll just stop singing, because you're all probably putting your fingers in your ear now, even though you can't actually hear me.**

**Here is the next chapter! Chris point of view on their 'talk' and 'the day after' starts! **

**Chapter 12**

**- Chris –**

I actually thought I was doing pretty well, considering the weird circumstances. I made Kurt-comments, held Darren like he actually was my boyfriend and ignored all the feelings that came because of that.

When things got a little too close to the subject I wanted to avoid and talk about at the same time, I tried to distract him with my Vogue comment.

Not that it worked.

So we started to talk about it, still in character. And then I said it. I said that I knew about his crush and that I was worried. Not that was entirely true, but it was a start. Talking about his last crush was a good move too, because it would remind him of the fact that he wasn't always uncomfortable to talk about women with me.

"Chris?" he said and with that all my walls came crumbling down.

Spilling everything out, I felt my heart beating like a maniac. But I just _had_ to get it _all_ out. Until I couldn't do it anymore. It hurt too fucking much. Not there was much left to say, because I said it all. I probably said too much.. My voice was reduced to a soft, harsh whisper, and I could see Darren walking away. Away from this pathetic little heap of human that was drown in self-pity and was totally unworthy of his friendship. With my eyes closed I just waited for the slam of my door.

Strong arms wrapped around me instead and pulled me against a solid, warm chest. This time it wasn't an accident. This time, he wanted me there. To say I was shocked would be an understatement.

"God Chris," he said and his voice held so many emotions, I couldn't decide which one was the most prominent there.

"I'm so sorry. I'm _so .. _I'm an idiot! I know that! But _god _you're so wrong!" Darren sounded so desperate, that I wanted to see his eyes. I needed to make sure what was happening and what he was feeling. He only held me closer, but in the end he let me go.

He looked like he was in misery. What did I do? What did he mean?

"I wasn't afraid like that.." He looked up at me and I couldn't let my gaze falter. His eyes bore right through me and I could feel my eyes water.

"And I will never. Ever. Be disgusted. Of you. Okay?"

What could I possibly say to that? I felt my head nodding and try to decide what I was feeling. Gratitude? Hope? But I still knew nothing!

"I screwed up big time, didn't I?" Just _tell_ me Darren!

"Why did you run away then?"

"..What do you mean?"

_Oh no. Don't give me that crap Darren! _He actually looked panicked and for a minute I thought he was going to run away _again._ But he didn't, he continued talking.

So.. He has a crush that doesn't like him back? And I reminded him of that? Who was that girl? Where did she live? Because I would give her a piece of my mind when I would see her. God, what was _wrong_ with her for _not_ wanting him?

"Oh Dare.. What girl in her right mind wouldn't return your feelings? You're the best catch running around! Hell, bouncing around! Just take one look at Tumblr, and you can see how many times people curse you for being so damn attractive, sweet, down to earth and humble. And they're right, you know! You really shouldn't think so little of yourself, because you are a great guy!" _Okaaay Chris. Too much. _His look said _too much_ too. But well, the damage was done.

"Don't look at me like that! You know I look at guys differently than you, and let me tell you..." I said, trying to save my own ass. For the thrill of it I gave him an approving look, which oddly made his cheeks go cherry. _Well isn't that interesting?_

"We'll see.. But Chris?"

"Yeah Dare?"

"Are we okay again?" His voice sounded really hopeful and vulnerable at the same time. His eyes were almost begging me with its intensity. His lower lip pouted a little and his hand was still clasped in mine, stroking softly. How could I stay angry at this gorgeous man? I couldn't. And I had been a fool too..

"Yes we are.. Sorry for doubting you. I'm just a tiny bit insecure sometimes you know? I'm not used to having friends like you. Hell I'm still not used to having friends at _all_."

Darren looked thoughtful for a second and then suddenly his whole demeanor changed.

"Well you have to get used to it sometime you know? Because you won't get rid of me!" he said and with that my old Darren was back. Grinning like an idiot and still looking charming.

"I'm afraid so.. Well. Since you brought all this stuff here, give me some redvines!" I yelled excitedly and kicked my feet in and enthusiastic matter.

I didn't have to tell him twice, because the pack of redvines was already open and before I knew it, I had opened diet coke in my one hand and four stripes of candy in my other. Chuckling softly I took a bite. One look at Darren made me a bit anxious. A redvine was dangling between his lips and his eyes twinkled maliciously.

"Favorite Army Mann song on three." He suddenly said.

_Oh. You are so on!_

"One.. two.. three" he counted.

"Red Vines" we said in unison and came a little closer.

"Favorite color of vines other than green."

"Red Vines!" we said again. His eyes twinkled more and I was sure I looked just as excited.

"Favorite way to red wines in a German accent."

"Red Vines!" we yelled now.

"Oh my god!" I said happily and gave him a hug. "Where have you been all my life?"

"In a cupboard under some stairs," Darren said casually and leant back on my couch. Feeling all relaxed and happy, I laid back too, laughing softly.

"Dare?" This really needed to be said.

"Hm?"

"Thank you." I said and it was enough. I could say thank you for making us talk about it. For doing it in character, because you know I couldn't do it otherwise. For telling me you knew you had behaved as an idiot. For making me feel at ease in two seconds, with just being you. Thank you, for being my friend.

"Thank you," he said back and with that we both knew. We were okay.

- - - –

A soft press of _something_ against my forehead woke me up. I really was screwed in the morning. I was grouchy, ugly, half blind and oversensitive for light and sound. So when I opened my eyes, I still didn't see anything. What was that? The click of my door woke me more. Was there someone in my trailer? Franticly I looked around. Was something stolen? Was my phone and laptop still here? One look told me they were. _Thank God._

What was it then? And what kind of thief would touch the 'house owner'. That didn't make any sense. As you can see, I'm very intelligent too in the morning. After ten minutes I finally knew it. Darren was here last night and he must have fell asleep on the couch with me. That would explain why I was on the couch. And it would explain the person leaving my trailer this morning. See, I can think logically. I just need to put my mind to it, that's all. Why did Darren leave though?

A note on my table said enough.

_Good morning sleepy head,_

_You were looking so peaceful I didn't had the heart to wake you up.  
>I hope you slept well, even though it was on your couch, I did :)<br>I'm really glad that we're okay, you know? I made you some  
>coffee (no Starbucks this time, sorry). But I smell really funny,<br>so I'm off to my trailer, because you wouldn't like my smell. At all.  
>See you on set! (At least I hope so)<em>

_~ Xx D_

Letting my fingers trail the sentences I felt a warm feeling inside. Darren was my best male friend ever. Standing up I knew today would be better than the days before...although I would miss the Chewbacca.

- - - –

Walking on set I tried to find Lea. We had a scene to film after the one with Grant. I checked almost every set there was, but I couldn't find her. There were too many people in here. Suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder. Turning around I saw Grant standing there.

"Hey you!" Grant said happily.

"Grant! Hi, have you seen Lea?" I asked with a slightly hopeful tone.

"No, I'm afraid not. But we have a scene to shoot don't we?" he asked and smiled.

"Sure do. I'm going to go all diva bitch Kurt on you. Are you prepared for my vicious words?"

Grant only smiled and raised an eyebrow.

"Are _you_ ready for this villain? I know you're pretty innocent Kurt, but I can rock your world, you know," he casually said and winked.

I grabbed my sides and laughed so hard, people probably noticed, but I didn't care. I loved Grant. He could be so in character sometimes it scared the hell out of me in a good way. Because he and Sebastian were _nothing_ alike. Kurt was partly me. And Blaine probably was very much Darren. But this nice, proper guy, wasn't anything like Sebastian. Thank god, because if there was a real Sebastian in here, I would probably resign.

"Oh my god, you _are_ rocking my world Grant. You just don't know it!" I said smiling. He laughed and scoffed his feet.

"Well I'm flattered!" he said and shyly looked away. "Come on Colfer, we have a bitch fight to get too!'

"Can't wait," I said and walked with him to the outside set. I liked acting angry and jealous. God, how many times did I have to cry on camera? Thank you so much for giving Kurt a 'happy ending', Ryan. He had to come with a hell of ending episode to make up for all the shit he put Kurt through.

"Chris? All set?" Ryan's voice cut in. I nodded. Sebastian wouldn't know what hit him.

**AN: Hello :D**

**Let me write you a poem:**

_**I love to write my favorite ship**_

_**Because it will never sink**_

_**It gives me such a trip**_

_**To read what you all think**_

_**I love the reviews like chocolate**_

_**They make me smile**_

_**So please keep doing that**_

_**If I'm worth your while**_

**Okay. That was rubbish. I just felt like it :D **

**ps. Thank you Rose, for being my beta. You're awesome :) **

_**Next chapter: Darren's wakes up with Chris. Some more Ashley (3) and jealous!Darren! **_


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee/Fox/Ryan/Ashley/Darren/Chris/and so on..**

**AN:**

**Me gusta! You all made me so nervous for this chapter! I really love how enthusiastic you are about this one, so I hope it will live to your expectations! Please let me know what you think!**

**Special credits too:**

**Avva, for prereading my chap and giving me feedback! Thanks hun!**

**Alice . Fake for giving me the idea of including 'Misery' in this chapter (: Thanks sweetie!**

**Oh and I really try to answer everyone personally :) If you don't like it, just say it. I'll shut up then. And if you do like, please keep leaving me reviews and stuff! I love it!**

**Here you go! Jealous! Darren :D**

**Chapter 13**

**- Darren -**

When I woke up I felt extremely well rested. And considering the fact that I slept on a _couch, with somebody_that was a strange thing. But I appreciated it nevertheless. Opening my eyes I saw Chris lying half on top of me. His head was resting on my chest and my left arm was wrapped around him. Why did it feel so good? Why didn't it bother me at all? I never slept with a guy like this, but the only feeling I got of it was inner contentment. I honestly thought I would have some weird feelings about it, but there were none. His soft breath ghosted over my chest and goose bumps arose all over my skin. It actually felt like a privilege to be able to see Chris like this, in his most vulnerable state. When I first met him I thought he would be a bit self-centered and very confident. Boy was I wrong.. He probably was the most insecure guy I knew. It didn't make me like him any less. It only made him more Chris. And let me tell you, Chris is a very magical, unique, wonderful guy. Sometimes I just didn't know how to feel or what to say when I was with him. Most of the time we joked around and had lots of fun, but sometimes, when I suddenly learned something new about him or saw a new part of his personality just by looking at him, I felt so overwhelmed, that I would be at lost for words.

A soft sigh escaped his mouth and took me out of my thoughts. That was probably for the best too. I had to go, because Chris probably wouldn't have liked it if he saw I crashed on his couch. Trying to peel Chris off of me, wasn't the easiest part, but eventually it worked. Standing up I almost fell down again, because my legs were still asleep.

_Not very weird if a guy slept on them for eight hours._

Thanks for reminding me of Chris _on_me again.

_You're very welcome._

On the table was a huge pile of empty papers from Redvines –I loved the memories of that from yesterday- and three empty cans of diet coke.

_Coke addict._

I snorted aloud and immediately looked at Chris again. I didn't wake him, did I? His soft snoring remained. Alright then. I should go.

_That's rude!_

Oh. Yes. I have to thank him for letting me stay the night, don't I?

_Yes. Make some coffee. He liked that yesterday._

I loved my brain. It always made up very good ideas and helped me with reminding almost everything. Convenient, really. So. I had to make some coffee. Wandering through the kitchen I soon found everything I needed. While I was busy making the coffee I suddenly felt very _domestic. _And actually, it made me feel weirdly comfortable inside. When I first thought about living together with a girl it always made my insides go all itchy. But now, talking with someone, falling asleep with someone on top of you, waking up with the same person, making coffee for each other. It actually made me feel alive and content. I poured the coffee in Chris's favorite mug and set it on the counter.

Now what?

_Leave._

No! I couldn't leave like this. He would think I ran away again! And that wasn't true. So I decided to leave him a note. Scrabbling my thoughts down, I looked at Chris again. The sun was lightly shining through the curtains and it made his face glow softly. His eyelashes were so long it made his already gorgeous eyes even more beautiful. His cheekbones were just _right, _they made me want to stroke them again and _again._ His face was so _relaxed_I almost felt like an intruder, for looking at him like this.

_He was the most beautiful person I have ever let my eyes on._

And to actually think that so clearly with Chris so nearby made me kiss his head. My lips tingled softly when I backed away. Tracing my lips with my thumb I noticed him waking up. God, I had to get the hell out of here. He probably felt me kissing him! So in four seconds I left and closed the door behind me. I would see him again today, but I missed him already.

I was sitting in the canteen with Lea when Ashley came in.

"Ash!" Lea yelled excitedly. Then she noticed us too.

"Hi girl!" and with that she gave Lea a hug.

"DC" she acknowledged me.

"Hey Ash, how are you doing! We missed you in here!" I said sincere. Writing Lauren off the show was probably Ryan's worst mistake.

"Same here love, same here. So I was actually looking for my guy! Did anyone see him?"

"Well _he_ probably knows," Lea said with a knowing smirk. I scowled at her. I didn't like the fact she knew I had a crush on Chris, but to hint at it with other people around, wasn't right. What if Chris found out! If he _ever_was to found out it should be because I told him. Not because Lea just blurted it out.

"Do you now?" Ashley said with a raised eyebrow.

"I think he is shooting a scene with Grant now.." I said and acted like I was guessing that. Not really. I knew his schedule by mind so I could _accidentally _run in to him during the day. And I knew for a fact that Chris knew mine too, so it wasn't a big deal.

"Oh! Well is he in the Lima Bean then? Because I don't really know where that set it," she said and looked at me quizzically.

Lea knew where the set was. But she looked at me. And I could get to see Chris again. Was I really turning this opportunity down?

_Hell no!_

"I'll walk with you, we were just done with lunching, right?" I asked and smiled sweetly at Lea. I decided to ignore her obvious wink and stood up.

"Come on then, let's surprise Chris!" I said and walked away with Ashley.

- - –

"So.. Sexiest man, huh?" Ashley said with an amused tone while we were walking.

I shook my head. Seriously? How long was I going to hear this? I really should have said no to that stupid thing. It _wasn't_ me! Did you see some screen shots of me? I'm _not_sexy. I'm Darren. Goofball first class! And I was fine with that, thank you very much.

"Yeah a lot of people went insane this year I guess." Ashley laughed out loud.

See? She thought so too!

"Come on Dare. You're smokin' hot and you know it".

Or not.

"No I don't. Come on Ash. Sexy is not on my resume and I don't want it to be. I'm just me. Oh and thank you so much for sending it to Chris. Made some interesting conversation." I said sarcastically, which really was a tone that felt unfamiliar in my mouth.

This made her laugh even louder! God, this woman! No wonder she and Chris were so close.

"Oh I've sent him worse" she said offhand. "But really Dare. I think you're hot. It's only that I'm totally in to Chris, so you're not really my type. Being straight and all that."

I stopped walking at that.

"You're nuts," I pointed out.

"Yeah nuts for Chris! And so are you apparently. What was all this about 'guys and girls' stuff in that interview Dare? Because you turned the whole CrissColfer fandom upside down you know."

"Why would Chris's fans get excited by that?"

"I meant the Criss Colfer. As in both your last names. You know they call you that right?"

"Eh, no?" I rolled my eyes. This was getting out of hand. Why was I even having this conversation with her? It did remind me of the reasons why I didn't check certain sites and links people sent me.

"You're avoiding the question Criss." She said and looked straight at me. She was scary sometimes, you know that?

"Drop it Ash. Let's go find Chris," I said and walked with her the last remaining steps to the set of the Lima Bean.

Ashley said something to me, but I didn't hear her. In front of us Grant was talking with Chris. But he wasn't _just_ talking. Oh no, he was standing _very_ close to Chris, he _winked_at him and.. Chris was laughing his butt off. What the hell was this? Why was Grant flirting with him? Why was Chris even allowing it? Was Grant even gay? Why didn't I know that? I stepped closer to try to figure this scene out, meanwhile trying to ignore my thundering heart.

"Oh my God, you _are_rocking my world Grant! You just don't know it!" Chris said with a dazzling smile.

A sharp stinging pain went through my chest and made me breath loudly. Why was he doing this? Why was he flirting back? Grant wasn't his type! He was... he was... God, he was Grant! And being that, he couldn't be his type. Because _his_ type had humor, brown curls, was nerdy and shorter than him. Grant was too long. That's right. _Way _too long.

"Well I'm flattered!" Grant replied and actually _blushed_. "Come on Colfer, we have to bitch around!"

Would anyone notice if I just hit him in the face like right _now_?

_I'll take the chance_

God, I wanted that. And that persistent, angry, nerve-wracking, _jealous_ feeling that run straight through me was a bit frightening. I knew how it felt to be jealous, hell I even wrote a song about it, but I've _never _felt it this intense.

_You are in misery  
>There ain't nobody<br>Who can comfort me  
><em>_Why won't you answer me  
>The silence is slowly killing me<em>

They walked _way_ to close. Their arms were even brushing! Didn't they know how _big _this set was? They could _easily _walk further apart. Grant kept looking at him in the corner of his eyes, didn't Chris notice that! God, he probably _enjoyed _it too! Why was Grant acting this way? Did their knees just brush too under the table? And I was _sure _that hand-grab wasn't scripted.

I didn't even noticed how I was gritting my teeth, how my hands were fisted so hard that my knuckles turned white and how my eyes were screwed till little slits.

_Boy you really got me bad  
>You really got me bad<em>

"Wooow. Okay. Screw it. You're in to him." A voice suddenly interrupted my jealous thoughts.

"Wha-?" I said and looked back, because who the _hell _felt like she could interrupt my spying?

Right. Ashley was with me.

"What are you talking about?" I said defensively and tried not to look at Chris or Grant. In which I failed miserably.

"If your looks could actually kill, Grant would be buried _and _cremated in a dump somewhere by now," she just stated.

I turned around and saw her look.

_She knows._

Oh God… GOD. She knows! And she will tell it to Chris in two seconds! Because they are best friends and tell each other everything. And she wants us to be together if her emails were anything to go by. God, I was screwed.

_Screwed, big time!_

Alright. Calm down. Focus. Talk to Ashley. Now!

"Ashley, please. Chris doesn't know. He can never know! Please…" I almost begged her, forgetting that Chris was very nearby and could accidently overhear me. My feelings were a bit mind-blowing at that moment, so I wasn't really in a full state of awareness. Ashley frowned at that.

"Why the hell not?"

"Because he will never feel the same for me, okay? Just look at him right now! God! I.. I don't even know what _I_feel! And I rather have him as a friend then out of my life," I said and heard my own desperate tone.

The look she was giving me was very calculating. It was quiet for a long time, but I didn't dare to interrupt her. I didn't dare to look at the scene that was playing behind my back either. I just couldn't stand any more _stuff_ of… _them_.

"Darren, you should talk to him. I don't know why you don't see the possibility of you two, but don't make your mind up for Chris. He can think for himself. And the way Grant is looking at him now, he knows too. So don't screw this up, because I will personally kill you. Savvy?"

Did she just quote Jack Sparrow? Didn't see her as the type.

_Focus!_

Right. I probably should overanalyze that answer when I was somewhere alone and actually had the time to think about it. And had the right mind to think about. I wasn't in a right mind, right now. So… Ashley said there was a possibility? That meant one thing.

"I have to stop Grant then?" I said and turned around, because her look was trained somewhere else.

_Now I'm gonna get you back  
>I'm gonna get you back<em>

"Seems like a plan. I think they're finished by now," she said and looked at Chris. He stood up, hugged Grant and walked off.

S_tupid-asshole-manthief-asswiggling-stupidsexyvoiceintimitator-uniformwearing-eyefu..._

"HOTSTUUUUUFF"

_Goodbye eardrums!_

Chris suddenly turned around with wide eyes.

_Can he look more adorable?_

"SWEETCHEEKS! GOD! HI!" he said and ran in her direction. He didn't even notice me, but that was okay. This was Ashley. Not Grant.

Being able to witness their reunion was a blessing and a good distraction. They looked so perfectly happy to be just hugging and letting out excited noises meanwhile.

"This sexy gentleman showed me where you were," Ashley said and stepped aside, so Chris could actually see me too.

His eyes lightened up even more. Was that for me?

"Dare! Thanks for the coffee, it was delicious," he said and smiled. Captivated by his eyes and smile I could only nod and smile back.

A cough was heard and my eyes suddenly went up to Ashley again. She very noticeably nudged her head towards Chris.

What the hell should I do? Grant was still _right _there and he was looking at me with a slightly smirking look.

Back off. Like right now.

Thank God my brain decided to interrupt me and save me _again_.

_Invite Chris over for something nice!_

"So I was wondering, did you have plans for tonight?" I heard myself asking with a nervous tone.

Wowowowow. Did I just ask that? Why did I do that?

"No?" Chris said and looked at me with a hint of excitement.

_That's why._

"Want to come over for dinner? Watch some movies?"

Say no say no say no.

"Sure! Shall I bring something?"

He said yes! He said yes! He said yes!

_You can thank me later, DC._

"Just your awesome self mister Colfer," I said and winked.

_Did you actually wink?_

I guess I did. Was that too much?

_A bit._

Chris saw it too if his shocked face was anything to go by.

"Alright then, I'll meet you at seven?" he asked and sounded a bit nervous.

"Fine! Well I have to go, have a scene with Cory.. See you tonight then?"

"You will! See ya," Chris said and walked off with Ashley, talking.

It really sounded like a date.

_You hang out with him all the time._

I know! But Ashley said something and then everyone was weird! What did she say again?

_Later Darren. Go to set, now!  
><em>_  
><em>Right. I had two free hours between my date –I could call it that in my head, right?- and my scene. I could think about it some more then. And meanwhile, I _really_had to keep an eye on Grant, because I didn't trust him for one bit.

_He's yours though and you know it._

Well, I couldn't really argue with myself over this, so I decided that yes, for tonight, Chris was _mine_.

_Boy you really got me bad__  
><em>_You really got me bad__  
><em>_Now I'm gonna get you back__  
><em>_I'm gonna get you back _

**AN: Aaaaaah! *hides behind bushes* Please don't eat me alive! I tried my hardest on this chapter! So let me know what you think and keep sending me constructive feedback! I like that :) And I always try to insert your ideas!**

_**Next chapter: Chris talks with Lea & Ashley *wiggle wiggle* And has a dinerdate!**_


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I own the file that contains this story. Nothing more!**

**AN; Hi Guys! Finally! The long awaited chapter. But I have to disappoint you. The dinner date is not in it... I'm sorry! But the chapter was getting longer and longer and I had all these ideas in my head for the next one. But I promise you the next chapter will make it up to you! It's already written and my beta is going to look at it this weekend! But it's twice as long as normally, so it should take a while. Please bear with me! Just keep in mind that I enjoy every review/message/alert you get me and that I'm very happy writing for you guys :)**

**Here you go!**

**Chapter 14**

- Chris -

This scene really was awesome. Thank you Ryan for bringing Grant in this show! It meant Blaine and Kurt finally had some angst in their relationship. It just made it more real. Happily ever after didn't really exist, well at least not without some holes in the way, so to see Kurt have some issues along the way too was amazing.

"God, I love my job," Grant said and nudged my knee.

"Same here. You were brilliant by the way," I said sincerely. Grant looked a bit taken aback. Did he actually blush? And then a sudden question went through my head.

_Why didn't I know if he was gay?_

Before I could ask him or something, he stood up. I followed him and unexpectedly received a hug. Hugging him back for a second I heard my stomach rumble. Grant laughed against my shoulder and let me go. Definitely time for a stop at the cafeteria!

"HOTSTUUUUUUUUUUUFF!" a very familiar voice suddenly yelled behind me.

God, was it really? I turned around and almost jumped in the air from happiness.

"SWEETCHEEKS! GOD! HI!" I yelled back and almost jumped on her.

"God, I missed you!" I said and while hugging her even tighter.

"You and me both lover!" she said happily and nuzzled my cheek.

"What are you doing here? How did you know I was here?"

"This sexy gentleman showed me where you were," she replied and stepped aside. If my day couldn't get any better, Darren stood there, looking gorgeous as ever but a bit self-conscious and... s_omething._ What was that emotion on his face? It didn't fit him. And why did it feel like I hadn't seen him for so long?

"Dare! Thanks for the coffee, it was delicious." He smiled and nodded. He seemed a bit off though.

Ashley coughed, making me look up to her. What the _hell_ was she doing? Did her brain have a spasm? Darren's voice took me out of my strange thoughts.

"So I was wondering, did you have plans for tonight?" Darren asked, his voice sounding really strained and anxious. Was he nervous? Why would he be nervous?

"No?" I answered, ignoring the flashback of the two of us on my couch.

"Want to come over for dinner? Watch some movies?"

Did he really have to look at me like that? Hell, even a _homeless _guy would even give him his cardboard box if he gave him this look!

"Sure! Shall I bring something?" I answered with a hint of excitement, and saw his face changing from absolute dread, to the face of a small kid who just heard he was going to get to go Disney for a day. So, he was excited too?

"Just your awesome self mister Colfer," he said and winked.

He fucking _winked_. Flirty prick.

"Alright then, I'll meet you at seven?" I said to get away from this situation. It was a bit _weird_ to say the least.

"That's fine! Well I have to go, I have a scene with Cory.. See you tonight then?"

Don't look at me like that, you _puppy_!

"You will! See ya," I answered him. Though I couldn't shake the feeling that it actually felt a bit like a date. It didn't make sense though, considering the fact that we spent many other nights and last night together too, and that definitely weren't dates. Why was I actually thinking about _Darren_ and _dates_? Those two didn't go together. Not for me at least.

"Come on sexy. I'm hungry! And we _need_ to talk." Ashley said and pulled me away from Darren.

"Yeah I'm hungry too! I know! God, I have to tell you lots of stuff!" I said excitedly and couldn't help but to pull Ashley even a bit closer.

"Does any of that _stuff_ involves a certain mister Criss?" she asked and smirked a bit too knowingly.

I scrunched my eyes at her.

"No? Well maybe. What was that brain-spasm about anyway?" She almost toppled over next to me cause of her sudden laugh.

"Brain spasm. God Chris. You know I heart you like majorly right?" she said putting her arms around me. I hugged her back, but still didn't get the answer I wanted.

"I love you too, but you didn't answer me and your distracting me doesn't work. So. Spill!" I said, using my Kurt bitch-voice.

"I just helped the poor guy. He looked a bit lost, don't you think?"

"He looked like someone ate his cookie. What was that all about?" I wondered aloud.

Meanwhile, we arrived at the cafeteria, where I was almost jumped by Lea.

"Chris! I missed you! Oh so you found Ashley! Great! you probably missed her, didn't you? Well I was just waiting for her, hoping I could catch you before we had to shoot our scene, because I needed to ask you something. But you have to eat right? Well I'm just going to sit there and-"

"LEA" I interrupted her. _God,_ that woman invented the word rambling, I swear!

"Sorry! I'm just really happy," she apologized and pointed to an empty table.

"I'm just going to sit there, be a nice girl, and wait for you," she said and nodded to herself, walking off.

"She's nuts. But I adore her," Ashley said fondly walking with me to the buffet.

"Me too, but when you're really tired, _and_ your body hurts in all the wrong places...you should avoid her. Like _really_ avoid her. Move to another continent or something.." I muttered, grabbed some sandwiches, and a side salad.

"Aw, you can always hide with me. I'll protect you from little, happy, bouncy, smiling, and singing creatures!" Ashley said with a vague tone. I suddenly got the feeling she didn't only mean Lea with that one.

"So what do you do these days Ash?" Lea asked and actually looked really interested. So I wasn't the only one who missed her then.

"Oh you know. Sitting home with Fred and staring at my phone waiting for Chris to call me.. He never calls me back, you know?"

Lea laughed and put out a pouted lip.

"He can't help it. He is always busy with Darren these days," she said a little bit _too_ nonchalantly while sipping her tea.

I raised my head from my sandwich and give her a dubious look. What was she hinting at?

"So you dumped me for that curly haired hobbit? Well if _that_ doesn't hurt my feelings... But well... _If_ you have someone else, it shouldn't be anyone other then Darren!" Ashley replied to Lea.

"Girls! Come on! What is this all about? I thought we were past the lets-get-chris-mad-with-thinking-darren-got-the-hots-for-him-stuff! It's not really funny you know? I mean he _is _straight and he already has to put up will all the crap the media and supposed 'fans' give him, but to have it from his own friends is just not cool!" I said and looked at them with a meaningful stare, throwing my arms up in frustration. Didn't they get it?

Lea chose that moment to put her hand on mine, and Ashley swiped her arm around my shoulder.

"Aw Chris, come on. We don't mean it like that, you know that. It's just that Darren makes it really hard sometimes for us to _not_ think anything about it. I mean, you act more straight then he does most of the time..."

Well they certainly had a point there, but that didn't make it right.

"Well he just is. So just believe and deal with it."

There was a pause in which no one said anything, but in which I suddenly realized my last answer sounded really bitter. God, I just give them more hope about me _really_ liking Darren in that way didn't I?

"Can we just drop the subject? I mean I do have to meet him tonight for dinner and if your weird hints all constantly play through my head, it won't help me in acting the just friend part," I said and almost choked.

Never before have I wanted to take my words back more than at that moment. How long had I kept all this feelings and longings inside of me? Never letting anyone feel or notice my real intentions towards Darren? Why was it that just today, in front of two of my best friends, I had to spill it out just like that? Why was it on a day in which I had a date with the cause of this all? Was it just a cruel joke of fate or something? Because I sure as hell didn't think it was funny, at _all_.

"Chris..." Ashley said softly.

I didn't dare look up. She would probably look at me all accusing and mad. Or even worse, she would have a look of pity on her face. What the hell was _wrong_ with me? Why couldn't I just like Darren as a friend? Why couldn't I be straight and just marry Ashley? She would love me unconditionally, I was sure of that.

"Honey," she now said and put her hand under my chin. I still couldn't look at her, even though she raised my head up.

"Hey come on, we're not mad. We don't think you're stupid, and we certainly don't pity you. Look at me sweetie," Ashley's soft worrying voice said.

God, she did know me too _goddamn_ well.

My eyes looked up and I was immediately shocked by the sincere worry I saw in there. And even though she looked really worried, I also noticed a bit of joy. What in this _fucking_ situation was even remotely close to _joy_?

"There you go," she said and smiling softly. "Chris I think you shouldn't blame yourself so much." I saw Lea nodding at that in the corner of my eye.

"She's right. I mean, he acts _very_ gay and I have two gay best friends, so I would know.." Lea added.

"It's just. I didn't want it to happen. I didn't want to fall for my best friend. I didn't want anyone to know either. Why can't I just be his best friend? Nothing less nothing more.." My voice really sounded miserable by now. Lea stood up and went to my other side. By now I was sandwiched between the two most caring girls I had in my life. Next to my mother and sister, that is.

"Well.." Lea said and I caught her giving a meaningful glance at Ashley.

"Maybe Darren doesn't want that either?" Ashley stated finishing up the sentence Lea wanted to state.

I laughed hoarsely and shook my head slightly.

"Ash, you've got to stop with this 'Darren is hot and he wants you' idea. See what it did to me!"

"Maybe she's right.." Lea said, and with that she laid her hand on my knee.

Why was she doing this? Wasn't she there when Darren told her all about his new crush? Didn't she go all 'I'm so happy for you' when he told her that? Why did she intend to give me false hope even when she _knew_ it would wasn't true, and she _deliberately _hurt me with that?

Right then my phone started buzzing. Sighing, I grabbed it out of my jacket.

_Chris, I didn't think about your reunion with Ashley when I asked you for tonight. It's okay if you rather be with her tonight. I know you missed her a lot, so don't feel obligated to anything. Xx _

_-D_

"Oh no. You _are_ going there. Don't let me stop you!" Ashley said next to me.

_Really Ashley?_

"It's rude to read other people's text you know.." I said a bit irritated.

Ashley just shrugged.

"You never minded before. But don't cancel your date Chris, I have all day to catch up with you!' she said and smiled.

That was _it_.

"It's _not_ a date! God! You guys! You are so... soo... _so_ annoying! Infuriating! God! " And with that I stood up and walked off.

Yes I missed Ashley a great deal, but if she only came back to go all _Criss Colfer rules and is going to be real_ on me, I wasn't going to let it happen. She should find someone else to put up with that crap. Storming through the hallways of McKinley, I didn't even care I actually had a scene to shoot with Lea. Cause, I just needed some air.

Slumping down a tree I inhaled deeply. This day had started so well. I woke up more rested than ever, I got a delicious cup of coffee, I shot an awesome scene with Grant, met Ashley again and got invited to dinner with Darren... Somewhere along the lines something went wrong. Maybe it already started with the whole waking up part with Darren? Oh god, I didn't text him back, did I? Taking my phone out of my pocket I quickly returned his text.

_No worries! Ashley is going away tonight, so I'm still coming over.. Well at least if you still want to. You did look a bit off earlier. Are you okay? Xx _

_-C_

When I sent the next I suddenly noticed the kisses at the end of my text. Did Darren do that too? One quick look proved that to be true. Well, that was new. The kisses reminded me of something... I pulled the grass a bit too hard underneath my fingers with my sudden realization. Did Darren _kiss_ me before he left this morning? I could still recall the soft imprint of something on my forehead this morning. Come to think about it, it did feel like lips. Well, that also was new, then... My brain _really_ had a lot to take in this day. And with that, Lea and Ashley's insinuations made a bit more sense. Maybe Dare did have a bit of guy-crush on me? We did see each other a lot, _and_ we worked really hard together, so it wouldn't be that weird. I didn't dare to give myself any hope though. I had crushes on other cast-members too. But my crushes were just that. They didn't really involve real feelings, right? They were just about attraction. My phone buzzed again, disrupting my mind.

_Of course I want to! Are you mad? Blowing of a date seems harsh, don't you think? ;) I just wanted to be a gentleman. I'm fine Chris. No worries.. Are you okay? I just ran into Lea and she mentioned you running off? I thought you had a scene with her? Xxx_

_-D_

_Oh. _So he thought it was a date too? Or was he just joking with me? We did do that a lot… God, I wished I never talked to Ashley and Lea today. They made everything so confusing! I probably could never look the same at Darren again.

_A date Dare? I wasn't aware it was a date.. In that case, shall I dress up then? Considering the fact that gentleman likes dressed up people? I'm fine. You know Lea, she went a bit ridiculous at me with her craziness. So I just escaped her for a while, so I'm getting some air. I will go back now, so if you're still there, tell her I'm coming. See you tonight! _

I honestly didn't even notice that we were flirting. Within one minute I had a text back.

_I didn't tell you? Well it is. So bring flowers. Or chocolate. I like chocolate. Because you have to bring presents on a date, that's what gentlemen do. Oh I know how you're feeling. Lea sometimes gets on my nerves too, and you need a lot to be able to do that.. Looking forward to tonight! I've already set up Aladdin! :) xXx_

I snorted. Him and his Disney... Well, he certainly is a _perfect_ match with me at that.

_You invited me! So you bring me something! Can we watch Mulan and the Little Mermaid too? :)_

_Sure! See you later Colfer :)_

_Later Criss_

Walking off to set I was already smiling again. Funny that. I was mad about the whole situation between me and Darren, but Darren was the one who actually got me out of that frustration. Lea was waiting on me with a thoughtful expression on her face. Thank god she decided to drop the subject and just acted the part with me. I really wasn't up to any more drama about me and Darren. I've had enough of that this last three days. And with my new realization about Darren's 'crush' on me, tonight certainly would be very interesting to say the least... I certainly was up for a bit of teasing. Teasing never hurt, did it?

_God, _I had _nothing_ to wear! I only had this _stupid_ vests and _stupid _shirts. Darren surely wouldn't approve to any of this. Maybe I should cancel. Yes, that probably was the best thing to do. Maybe Ashley was still on set? I could go away with her instead. Or eat ice cream and watch a romantic movie or something. Retrieving my phone from my pocket, I honestly considered canceling on Darren. Not because of the clothes. Well, they were a part of that yes, but there was more. I was just so freaking nervous, I didn't want to go. I was scared that I would blurt something out about his 'crush' on me. Or about my own feelings, which was like ten times worse, because _hey_, I was in love with this guy. My stomach jumped up at that and I sacked down on my couch. I couldn't do this. At that moment my phone buzzed.

_I brought the perfect gift for you! Can't wait :)_

I couldn't stop the smile that came because of that. What did I do to deserve him? I was seriously kidding when I said that thing about bringing gifts. I was! And now he actually bought me something, even though he didn't have very much time to do that today. It made me feel warm inside. And being really honest… I had spent lots of time with Darren before, but I just had this gut feeling that tonight wouldn't be the same as any other nights.

**AN: Well Chris got that right. It _is_ going to be different. You just have to wait to find out! **

**I'm really sorry guys for not updating every day anymore, but that's because I want you to enjoy my writing and you can do that much better after my beta looked at it. Because I sometimes make stupid mistakes in my work. Sorry! I do my best to write fast and my beta works hard too, so bear with us :)**

**Special thanks to Gleeker1985 for being the most awesome beta 3**

**And to alice . Fake ! You know why :)**

_**Sneak preview next chapter: **_

"Darren, you guys are best friends right?"Ashley asked in a matter of fact tone.

"Ofcourse!"

"Then you should be able to talk with each other about things like this… Just try it, Chris won't bite. Or maybe he will, but in a different matter then you think," she said and laughed at her own joke. I couldn't help but smile a little too.

"Alright. Thanks. I'll see you some time!"

"You bet you will! Good luck tonight Dare," she said and hung up.

She was right. I _could_ talk with Chris about this. I _should_ talk with Chris about these feelings. I told him about all my other feelings too, didn't I? Before I could think it over, a knock sounded on my door. Jumping off my couch I walked to my door with a nervous and excited feeling.

_He is here!_

I know! Opening the door I noticed how even my fingers were trembling. And when the door finally _was_ open, I immediately knew why.

No freaking words could describe how he looked at my doorstep.


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: do not own.**

**AN; Well hello lovely readers! :D Here is the awaited chapter! I really hope it is up to your expectations! If it's not, I've heard there are very big trees and buildings where I can hide behind :D**

**Special thanks to my beta ,to alice . Fake and to mardie for helping me out with this chap :) Love you both!**

**Chapter 15**

- Darren -

Wrapping up my scene with Cory, I sat down on the piano bench, stretching my legs a little.

"So, what are you doing tonight? Me and the guys are going out to watch a movie or something," Cory said patting me on the back. I really felt really short now. I mean I was sitting on a bench and he was standing up. I almost had a conversation with his knees here!

"Oh! Uhm no sorry, I've got plans actually," I said and shrugged slightly. He didn't have to know that my plans involved a very fun night with a certain Chris Colfer.

"Alright then. Better luck next time, eh? I've just got to ask Chris if he wants to come then…" He said but then looked as if a light bulb appeared inside his head.

"Ah no. Ashley is here so he probably wants to spend his evening with her. He sure as hell misses her!" he said to himself and then walked off. He probably thought I was gone too, because I was so low to the ground or something.

_Stop making jokes about your height, moron._

Well, I _am_ short you know.

_You make up in awesomeness._

Ahw, that was really sweet, wasn't it? Okay. I did _not_ just thought about my own thoughts as sweet. And _that_ really sounded weird, even if it was just in my head.

_Snap out of it Darren!_

There. All serious again.

Cory did have a point too. Maybe Chris didn't want to be with me, because he actually wanted to be with Ashley. It made a lot more sense, knowing he hadn't seen her for a while and all that. I really looked forward to our evening, but Ashley was his friend too and I couldn't keep him all to myself, right? So I decided to text him, because I wouldn't want to ruin his evening.

_If he chooses to be with Ashley, you better hope she doesn't tell him._

Oh fuck. She would. I know she would, she just couldn't keep her mouth shut!

_If he chooses to be with you, that'll say a lot of things. And you can tell him yourself._

It would mean the world to me if he decided to be with me tonight. But that telling him part probably was _never_ going to happen. Not tonight anyway.

"Whoops! Watch it DC, I bruise easily you know," Lea said and laughed at her own joke. I really didn't think it was _that_ funny, but I laughed nonetheless.

"Sorry for almost running you over, I was thinking a bit too deeply I guess," I said and smiled.

"It's okay. Did you see Chris somewhere?" she asked and looked a bit worried now that I was looking closer at her.

"Ehm no? Doesn't he have a scene with you?"

"Well yes. But he ran away from me just now, so I don't know if he's coming back.."

I gave her a strange look. Chris ran away? From Lea? What the hell did she do? Oh no! Did she tell him?

"Chris ran away from you? Why would he do that?" I asked anxiously.

Lea her worried look changed into an innocent angel in one second.

_What the hell was that about?_

"I don't know. Maybe he just had to use the restroom or something?" she said nonchalantly and bumped her fist in to my arm. She had better not have told Chris about my feelings. She promised she wouldn't!

"Well I'm going! I have a scene to shoot.. _If_ Chris decides to show up, that is. We should talk together soon! Because I feel like I haven't talked to you in ages! You're still the Tony to my Maria, you know?" Rambling really was her thing. And you _really_ wouldn't like to be around her when she was drunk. Although she actually was pretty funny then.

"I know, we should. Now go! If I ran into Chris, I'll tell him to go to you, okay?" I asked and nudged her. She nodded and took off. At that moment my phone buzzed.

_A date Dare? I wasn't aware it was a date.. I shall dress up then, no? Considering the fact that gentlemen like dressed up people. I'm fine. You know Lea, she went a bit ridiculous at me with her craziness. So I just escaped her for a while, so I'm getting some air. I will go back now, so if you're still there, tell her I'm coming. See you tonight! _

Oh shit. Did I say it was a date? Well at least he acted cool towards it. It even looked as if he was… flirting? I didn't dare to hope, but it did look a bit like that, didn't it?

_It does. Take your chance! Flirt back!_

_I didn't tell you? Well it is. So bring flowers. Or chocolate. I like chocolate. Because you have to bring presents on a date, that's what gentlemen do. Oh I know how you're feeling. Lea sometimes gets on my nerves too, and you need a lot to be able to do that.. Looking forward to tonight! I've already set up Aladdin! :) xXx_

Was that too much? Reading it again I decided it wasn't. It actually sounded a lot like me. Funny, food- and Disney-addicted Darren.

_You invited me. So you bring me something! Can we watch Mulan and the Little Mermaid too? :)_

So Chris wanted me to get him something? Well I could do that. I had some time left before Chris was coming to see me tonight. Looking at my watch I saw I had about four hours till he came. Right. Let's get this party started!

In two hours I was home again. I bought everything I needed for dinner and even found the _perfect _present for Chris. Although I wasn't sure if tonight would be the night to give it to him. It was… pretty personal and _real._ And I didn't want Chris to think I was giving it to him as a joke, because I really wasn't. So if tonight would be the night in which I came clear about my feelings, he would get it. Otherwise, well… I don't know if he _ever_ was going to get it.

Picking up my groceries I stalled them out on in my kitchen. I was going to cook Filipino style tonight, so I had to take my time to prepare everything. Chicken Adobo was one of my favorite dishes. I hoped Chris would like it too. And as a dessert I was going to make some banana pudding. Preparing everything I put the pot on the stove to cook. While slicing my bananas I was softly singing teenage dream.

No matter how many times I sing that song, it always makes me smile. It always meant a new beginning for me. A new beginning of a sky-rocketing career that started out of nowhere. First, I was this goofy guy who just sang Disney songs on Youtube, and made a musical about Harry Potter with some friends. People liked that, they did, and I sure as hell loved it with all my heart, but me becoming Blaine… It was just unreal.

Out of nowhere everyone knew who I was, I had to do performances for important events like the Trevor Project that was coming, I get to work with some _amazing_ people, I was in a film. If you told me two years ago that I would become number three in the Sexiest Man of 2011, I would have laughed so hard it would make my ribs ache.

Heck, it still made me laugh actually. It also stood for a new beginning of Kurt and Blaine. When I came into the show, it wasn't even decided yet if I would become Kurt's boyfriend, but as soon as Ryan saw our chemistry during Teenage dream, it was decided. Klaine was a fact. And besides the love I had for other crew members, the love I had for the solo's I've gotten, and the love I had for the Warblers…

The love for Kurt and Blaine together... it exceeded all of that. Even before I was even on the show, I loved Kurt's character. He was just so strong and full of unrecognized talent, I wanted to close him in my arms and tell him he would be okay, and was far better than he thought.

_Huh, and you thought you weren't gay?_

No. It's just in my nature to keep everyone safe and happy.

_Even a fake character?_

He did have point there. But yes, of course. I was a fan boy through and through, but then again.. Meeting _Chris_ was just mind-blowing. The immediate click we had overpasses all my other experiences with meeting new people. Yes, people say they always thought I was such a sweet and humble guy, but the fact is that I am awkward. I say things before I think, and most of the time _I_ even think I act weird. But Chris just loved all that in one second and even started quoting my own musical back at me. _The_ Chris Colfer! I still couldn't believe it. Grinning like a maniac I finished making dessert and put it in the refrigerator. Almost done!

I quickly changed my clothes to something more… nice. It just wouldn't do to put all this effort in my food, cleaning up my trailer and getting him a present but not changing my looks for him.

_You thought it felt like a date. You act like it's a date and you called it a date to Chris._

Ten points to Ravenclaw. So?

_I think Chris is freaking out by now_.

Oh God, he would, wouldn't he? He was always worried that he would overstep a boundary or something with me, and now here I was all flirty and stuff! Well, flirtier than usual. Hell, _I _would freak out when my gay male co-star would act toward me that way. I had to do something.

_Text him! And use some sweet, adorable, Darren words. They always seem to help._

Within a minute I texted him and sat down on my couch. What if I really freaked him out and he wouldn't come? That would be awful! And on top of that, the next few days, in which we had to shoot scenes, would be extremely awkward. The sound of one new text message helped me out of my misery.

_Did you really do that Dare? You didn't have to! I was just kidding :) Although I'm very curious now. See you in a bit!_

_Thank God._

Yes, thank you brain! He was coming! At that moment my phone rang.

"Hello? Darren Criss speaking," I said casually.

"You old man. No one picks up his phone like that!" I laughed.

"Hello to you to Ashley. What's up?" I asked and put my feet on the table.

"So, I heard you have a date tonight!" I shouldn't have picked up the phone.

"Yes, well you were there when I asked him, weren't you?" Was it possible to actually _hear_ someone grin on the phone?

"Yes, I was. You can thank me for that later DC. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you to have fun tonight," she said with a happy tone.

"Well thank you! I certainly plan on doing that. I cooked my favorite dish and made some banana pudding. And I already have my Disney movies ready. Oh! And I bought him a present. And god I'm telling you way too much, please tell me to shut up." A laugh was heard from the other side of the phone.

"Are you nervous Darren?"

"No."

"Right. You don't sound nervous at _all_. But honey, just to let you know. If you hurt my boy, I'm going to hurt you, okay?" How could she say such things and sound so sweet while doing that?

"I wasn't planning on hurting him Ash… But I think I got the message here."

"Make sure you do. And oh! What kind of present did you buy?"

"Not going to tell you! But it's nice. I just hope he likes it..."

What if he didn't? What if he laughed in my face because of it? I really couldn't stand that.

"I'm sure he will, he loves presents you know?"

It was quiet for a minute.

"Ashley?" I asked tentatively.

"Yes honey?"

"Did you mean what… do you think Chris…?" What the hell was I asking anyway?

"Darren, you guys are best friends right?" Ashley asked in a matter of fact tone.

"Of course!"

"Then you should be able to talk with each other about things like this… Just try it, Chris won't bite. Or maybe he will, but in a different matter then you think," she said and laughed at her own joke. I couldn't help but smile a little too.

"Alright. Thanks. I'll see you some time!"

"You bet you will! Good luck tonight Dare," she said and hung up.

She was right. I _could_ talk with Chris about this. I _should_ talk with Chris about these feelings. I told him about all my other feelings too, didn't I? Before I could think it over, a knock sounded on my door. Jumping off my couch I walked to my door with a nervous and excited feeling.

_He's here! _

I know! Opening the door, I noticed how even my fingers were trembling, and when the door finally _was_ open, I immediately knew why.

No freaking words could describe how he looked at my doorstep.

He wore black skin tight jeans, which really were _too _tight to let me think straight. No pun intended. On top of that was a dark grey shirt with black hems that was up till his elbows which made me see this leather bracelet which looked totally awesome and sexy on his arm. He also wore a tight black vest on top of that that accentuated his tall waist which I just wanted to lock in my hands. He looked _stunning_ and he totally took my breath away. The long slender neck that arose above this all made my jaw slack. I really shouldn't want to kiss and suck this desperately. I shouldn't. I decided to move on, before I acted upon these thoughts. His hair was styled even better then Kurt's hair ever was and his eyes…

_God_, his _eyes_.

They were sparkling blue right now, but I knew it could change any moment. They could become green or grey or that amazing 'teal' color that always felt like _home _when I looked at them. Said eyes were looking at me with a knowing look and that made me shake out of my thoughts.

"You're here!" I said, still slightly breathless. God, this wasn't me! I always knew what to say or do. I was never this nervous! But then again, this was Chris Colfer. He just always knew exactly how to get to me.

He laughed softly and put his hand on my right arm.

"So it seems! Are you going to let me in?" and with that he squeezed my arm a little. Holding in the yelp that was about to leave my lips I stepped aside.

"Yeah sure! Sorry. I was distracted for a second." Not smart Darren. _Not_ smart. Chris only gave me smile though and walked inside.

"Mmm, something smells really good! Where did you get that food?" He asked and sat down on the couch. I walked to the stove and turned the heat down.

"I bought the ingredients at the supermarket and cooked it myself," I said, a bit proud. Chris his eyes became wide and green. See? They could change every minute!

"You cooked?" he said and walked up to me. Hey, you don't have to sound _that_ surprised you know!

"Yeah? Don't you like it? I didn't know if you'd like it, but I think you do, because you always order the same things as I do, so I just figured…"

Chris his face transformed from shocked, to an almost endeared look while he stood right behind me, and put his head on my shoulder.

"That is really nice of you! I can wait to taste it, it smells _really_ good!" he said and made a soft approving noise.

The double meaning those words _could _have and that noise with the combined hot breath against my neck did certain things to me, so I couldn't walk away from the stove before I had a moment to collect my thoughts, breathing, _and_ composure.

"It's almost ready, maybe you can put some music on?" I said while stirring the rice, hoping he would get the hint and would move away, because him pressed up against my backside, was too much.

"Sure!" He said, as I felt him moving away to put on a playlist. "Damn Darren, this is all Freelance Wales or Katy Perry! Oh no, there's Pink too. Oh! You've got a glee playlist? That's cool. What do you want?" he asked and turned around, head slightly bowed so he could look at the mp3 player.

_Don't look at his ass you pervert!_

Rushing my look upwards, I hoped I didn't look as startled as I felt.

"Ah the last one? Haven't heard that one for a while. It's up to date though." He nodded and selected the play list.

"Is there something I can do for you?" he asked and gave a questioning look towards me while Amber softly came out of my speakers. Was Chris acting a bit… off? Or was it just me? Because the 'Is there something I can do for you' was combined with a look that flickered towards my you-know-what for just two seconds.

"No no no. It's done and you're my guest. Date, remember?" I said and winked. God! I did it again!

"Well then, I'll try to be the perfect guest. Don't get your hopes up though! I'm clumsy, but you know that." I smiled at that and brought the pans over to the table.

"Yeah I know. Can I just say something?" I asked and nervously bit my lower lip. His gaze told me to go on.

"You look amazing tonight. I mean you always do, but now you just. You know.. Yeah."

_Very articulate Darren, very…_

Stop it, I already felt embarrassed enough! I didn't dare to look directly at Chris, so I turned my gaze a little to the left. If I had looked, I would have noticed his softened smile, and his shimmering eyes.

"Thanks! Although your Blaine is showing a bit honey," he said and turned a bit towards me.

I laughed at that while shaking my head.

"Yeah. I mean no! No. Blaine loves Kurt and Darren..." Could I just say it like that?

Wasn't it too early? Should I even say it?

"Darren l… likes Chris."

_You stupid-ass moron!_

"Oh… well, I think Chris likes them both." Chris said and actually looked a bit disappointed at my answer.

"Both?"

"Yeah!" he said and looked determined. "Blaine and Darren, they're pretty much the same person sometimes. You know aside from the lack of socks and the anger management problems..." Chris looked at me and I almost thought I saw something there. Something a little bit _too_ knowing.

"What do you mean? I'm not Blaine. He has way too much gel in his hair, and that is just the start of a list with many differences between him and I."

"You're right. I like your clothes better," Chris said nonchalantly and lifted the lid from the pan.

"Let me do it," I said and grabbed a spoon to dish us some food.

"I like my clothes more too. I can't believe how much those clothes actually cost! I'm really glad you don't share Kurt's love for clothes though, because you always look better with your own clothes! Except for the scene in the auditorium. You looked hot there"

_Not gay at all._

"Me too, believe me. I like skinny jeans, but some things are just _not_ cool." Chris muttered and I decided to keep in my comment about liking him in skintight jeans too. Just then a moan vibrated through the air and I almost dropped my plate on my lap.

"This is good! _God, Darren_!" he said and looked at me with big round eyes and parted lips.

_Down, boy!_

Was the air actually that dry in here or was it just my mouth?

"Glad to he-hear that you like it, I-I did my best!" I stammered out.

"You really worked hard for tonight, didn't you?" Chris said and gave me a dazzling smile, while scooping up some more food for him.

"I tried too, yes. See! Something Blaine is not good at either. He is not romantic. At all." Were we trying to get into character again? Because that actually wasn't the purpose of this evening.

"I disagree. Blaine is very romantic." Chris said matter-of-factly.

"Is not. How is Blaine romantic? Kurt's the one who brought the flowers, wants their first time to be romantic, and all that. Blaine is just a drunk ass who almost ruined his relationship with the guy he loves more than life!"

Eyes that were sneaking glancing at the half full pan suddenly looked up.

"The love of his life?" Chris asked with an unreadable expression. I swallowed hard.

"Well, yes. He is. Come on. You're meaning to say Kurt's going to find some other guy in New York and forget all about me? "

It was still for a few seconds.

I said 'me' didn't I?

_Yup._

Damn.

Chris just coughed and went on like nothing happened, taking one more spoon of my cooked food. I smiled softly, he really liked it then.

"Nah. He probably thinks Blaine is the one, you're right. Who am I kidding. I really love those two. They should be together forever and always. Although I do like the drama filled angsty moments sometimes. Life isn't all roses and stuff."

"I like it too, but when you look so heartbroken, I really want to hug you. You're too good as an actor sometimes, you know that?" I said and cleaned off the table, to return with our deserts.

"You do? I wouldn't mind, you know," Chris said and laughed softly putting his feet underneath my legs.

"I think you don't want Kurt and Blaine to break up, because you'd miss me too much." I said teasingly.

"Don't flatter yourself honey," he said and put a spoon full of banana pudding in his mouth.

I already steadied myself for the coming moan, and God it was good that I did that, because the sound was even more agonizing and hot. What if he sounds like that when we -.

_Okay! He is next to you! Eating a _dessert_! Pervert!_

"I think you do. You'd miss the kisses, wouldn't you?" I said and gave him a goofy grin.

It was silent for a second.

"I don't think Blaine and Kurt ever kissed."

My face must have shown my absolute confusion. What the hell was he getting at?

"I can count the times on my fingers. I might even still have some bruises from the time we were in the freaking back of a car making out for _hours!_" I said, still confused.

"Exactly. _We_ were making out." Chris said and almost forgot about his dessert when his eyes bore right through me.

"What do you mean?" I said, biting my lower lip.

"Don't you think it's strange that we never do staged kisses?" Chris said, tilting his head a bit.

"I do-. Well w-. No. Why would that be strange? Do you mind me kissing you?"

"Did it look like I minded?" Chris said incredulously.

_What_ was he getting at?

"No. Not at all. You're a guy right? And you like guys? So what's wrong with kissing one?"

An exaggerated sigh made his way to me.

"_Nothing_'s wrong with kissing one, Dare. Except said guy claims to be straight and all that. I really love the fact that you're so open about it all, it just sometimes makes me wonder…"

_You have every right to wonder_.

As an act of fate, at that moment the playlist changed to a new song.

_Here we go again  
>I kind of wanna be more than friends<em>

I couldn't help the laugh that escaped my mouth. Fortunately Chris laughed with me.

"Oh God. This is just…"

"Weird," we finished in unison. We shared an amusing smile, until I started to sing along looking straight at him.

_Oh-oh  
><em>

_I want some more  
><em>

_Oh-oh  
><em>

_What are you waiting fo~or  
>Take a bite of my heart tonight<em>

_Here we go again  
>I feel the chemicals kicking in<br>It's getting heavier and I wanna run and hide  
><em>

_I wanna run and hide_

Chris quirked his eyebrow, but started the next verse.

_I do it every time  
>You're killin' me noo~ow<br>_

_And I won't be denied by you,  
>The animal inside of you!<em>

We stared into each other's eyes deeply and for the moment ignored the chorus. I would never deny him anything. Was I the one breathing so hard or was it Chris? Were my pants this tight when I put them on? In the background the music went on.

_Hush hush  
><em>

_The world is quiet  
><em>

_Hush hush  
><em>

_We both can't fight it  
>It's us that made this mess<br>Why can't you understand_

_Woah I won't sleep tonight!_

"Darren," Chris breathed. I put my finger on his lip.

"Hush," I softly said, trying to decide if this was a right moment to kiss him.

_Just go with the flow!_

And with that I connected our lips. A soft gasp gave me the possibility to slip my tongue inside his mouth.

_Fuck._

This was absolute _heaven_. It didn't feel like any other kisses we shared. This was just _us_. We both _knew_ that. It _felt _like that.My hand was cupping Chris's face, and the other found his way around his neck, while our tongues were dueling with each other. Goosebumps arose all over my skin and my head felt dizzy.

The lack of air tore us apart.

I couldn't stop staring with unbelief at Chris. He kissed me back! He didn't hit me! He wanted me!

"Wh-what was that?" Chris asked looking frightened, aroused, shocked, and delirious at the same time.

"That was me kissing you," I just stated, too dazed to form any other logical words. A harsh laugh sounded through the air.

"Believe it or not, I did register that fact. I mean what _was_ that?" his disbelieving eyes made me want to curl up and hide.

"It… Did you… Look I'm sorry. I probably shouldn't have done that," I said sullenly.

I probably misunderstood every fucking signal Chris gave me. I was just as oblivious as Blaine in this department.

A hand on my cheek made me look up.

"Don't apologize. Just tell me why you did that," Chris said and gave me a pleading look. His hand was soft and warm against my cheek and I turned my head sideways to nuzzle against his hand. I didn't see the smile that reached his eyes at that moment.

"It's just. God, Chris. I didn't plan this alright? Don't think for one second that I invited you over and cooked you a fancy dinner so I could just snog you or something. I- " I couldn't get it out. What if he would laugh at me? Or worse, what if he ran away like I did just two days ago?

"Why did you invite me over then?" he asked and I could give him a dumb answer._ Because we're friends. _But that wouldn't do. Ashley was right. Chris was my friend and I should talk with him about this.

"I saw your scene with Grant today." I started and the confused look combined with the dropping hand, made me launch forward. I grabbed his hand and entangled our fingers.

"Hear me out, okay? I saw your scene with him. And before that too. He- He was flirting with you. Like really obviously," I stated and raised my eyebrows to gather his reaction.

"So he was! I thought it was just me overreacting or something!" Chris said and stared at me with a victorious look. God, he didn't actually _like_ the flirting, right?

_Go on._

"You certainly weren't. But I was standing there with Ashley and suddenly she noticed something about me."

"You did look a bit off!" His eyes suddenly became bigger. "Sorry, go on."

"I was _off_. I was fucking _pissed_. He was almost tearing your clothes off with his eyes." The sudden squeeze on my hand and the soft laugh reminded me of the simple fact that this was Chris. I could tell him everything. He understood me. He always did. Well, here goes nothing.

"He made you laugh, you flirted a bit back, although I don't think you know that and he was _constantly _touching you and I just… I snapped."

Chris shook his head slightly. "Why? Why did it bother you so much?"

"Because I want to be the one that does those things to you. I want to make you laugh in the way that makes your eyes explode with sparkles, which makes you eyes crinkle at the sides. I want to flirt with you and never feel ashamed for it. I want to take your hand, just because I can. I want to touch you, because you want me to touch you. I want to be able to look at you and think 'He's mine'. I want that. I want all of that." I said and felt my eyes watering. I was _not _going to cry, damnit. I just had a lot of feelings, right now.

There was a deafening silence in which my mp3 player ironically played 'Don't You Want Me?' in the background. I swear that thing would be gone tomorrow.

A very familiar soft hand landed on my knee, which made me look up. How was it that I could never prepare myself for his eyes? They were _never _the same and now I couldn't possibly know what he was about to do.

"Do you really want all that?" He asked with a disbelieving tone. It didn't really help that his lips were still a bit red from our shared kiss.

"Yes, and I want so much more with you Chris.. I know I want too much. I know. You probably will never feel for me that way. And even if you did, I'm certainly not good enough for you. I'm not. I know that. Oh god. Maybe you should go. I'm sorry… I just-"

"Don't. Stop it. Don't you _ever_ think you're not good enough. For me or anybody, okay? You are amazing!" Chris said with an almost angry tone. "God, you're _wonderful_." His voice deflected to a softer, innocent tone while his fingers were now upon my face, and softly stroking the contour of my jaw.

"Please Chris, don't. Just don't. I really feel like a fool right now, but you don't have to be so sweet. Just tell me to back off, and I'll try to never put this crap on you again." I squeezed my eyes shut and waited for the rejection.

Dry, soft lips pressed against mine. This time I was the one who gasped. Did he really… did he want me too?

_**AN; And that was it! Gosh! I'm so very happy with this chapter but also very nervous about it! Please let me know what you think of it! :) I love the reviews/alerts/messages I get so much! They're like Oreo cookies 3**_

_**Next chapter isn't written yet, although I have some ideas. I probably finish it tonight. If any of you has wishes/suggestions/ideas feel free to tell me! I love them and try to use them as ****much as possible :) **_

_**Thanks for staying with me!**_


	16. Chapter 16

**AN: Hello my lovely readers! Thank you so much for bearing with me! I know you all expected this chapter earlier, but I hope the prompts made the wait less worse ;) I really hope you like this chapter!**

**I also want to use this note to thank you all, because the alerts that are still coming in for this story are mind-blowing and the reviews.. (88!) I can't explain how happy they make me :) So thank you all for liking this story and for taking the time to let me know what you thought of it!**

**Disclaimer; still don't own anything.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 16<strong>

Nervous as hell I knocked on his door. God, what was I doing? I could still turn around and run away.

Damn.

The door was open, and in front of me.. stood the most ridiculous handsome man the world knew, at least in my opinion he was. I wanted to greet him, but Darren wasn't looking at me. Well, he _was_ looking at me, but _not _at my eyes. His burning gaze softly went over my whole body and I felt my skin flush. What the hell was he doing? His gaze was currently at my neck and I saw his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. He really shouldn't look at me with such… _hunger_. At last he reached my eyes.

"You're here!" Darren said, slightly breathless.

Well, this evening just kept getting more interesting every second. Operation 'tease-to-please' was on!

"So it seems! Are you going to let me in?" I said as I rushed in by him.

Inside I immediately felt at ease. Standing behind Darren, seeing and smelling what he actually cooked himself, made me strangely feel like home. Meanwhile, Darren was getting cuter, and more adorable by the second. He really looked flustered and nervous about me being here. So maybe Lea and Ashley had a point and he _did_ have some sort of crush on me. Well, tonight was the night to find out. Acting a bit flirtier then normally never hurt anyone, right?

The food smelled divine. I took one bite and heard the sound I made, feeling a bit ashamed. If my mouth could have an orgasm, it just did, that's how good it tasted. I will immediately confess I hadn't eaten this good in a _long_ time. And I was always in for some free food so that said something. Looking up I saw Darren looking at me with dark eyes. Why was he looking at me like that? Oh. I probably shouldn't moan like that when he was sitting next to me. I tried to keep in my lusty sounds and went along iwith the conversation.

Before I knew it, we were talking just like always, and sitting comfortably around each other. The food was simply delicious. I will immediately confess I hadn't eaten this good in a _long_ time. And I was _always_ in for some free food, so that says something.

When we started to talk about Blaine and Kurt again, I was wondering if we were heading towards role-playing again, but then Darren slipped.

"Well, yes. He is. Come on. You're meaning to say Kurt's going to find some other guy in New York and forget all about me?"

He said 'me' and not 'Blaine'. Definitely. But he looked so embarrassed that I just decided to move on with the conversation. I was just enjoying our evening and I didn't want it to become weird or anything. I honestly didn't even notice that the amount of touching and flirting there was between the lines.

And then Darren said I would miss his kisses. Was this my chance to talk to him about the little awkwardness there was between us? If the eyefucking was anything to go by, my assumptions weren't entirely ill-founded. I decided this was my chance.

"I think Blaine and Kurt never kissed."

Darren of course, oblivious as always, looked at me like I grew three heads.

"I can count the times on my fingers. I still probably have some bruises from the time we were in the freaking back of a car making out for _hours!_" he said while sounding so confused, it actually irritated me.

"Exactly. _We_ were making out." I stated and looked at him. _Really _looked at him.

"What do you mean?" His entire posture more nervous than confused now.

"Don't you think it's strange that we never do stage kisses?" I was not giving up right now.

"I do-. Well w-. No. Why would that be strange? Do you mind me kissing you?"

_Really Darren?_

"Did it look like I minded?"

"No. Not at all. You're a guy right? And you like guys? So what's wrong with kissing one?"

God, didn't his mouth have a direct connection with his brain? Any idiot would have caught up by now.

"_Nothing_'s wrong with kissing one, Dare. Except if the guy claims to be straight and all that. I really love the fact that you're so open about it all, it just sometimes makes me wonder…" I said and let the question hang in the air. He was next now. He could confess or deny, but it was in his hands now.

And then the God of music decided that that was the moment to interrupt us with _Animal_ of all things.

When the hell did we start to sing along? And why did he look at me like that? Should I be listening to the lyrics more closely? What did he sing? What did I sing? I didn't want to be denied by him? Well that was true. Darren's honey colored eyes were sparkling bright, and his pupils were very dilated, looking at me with emotions I didn't dare to name.

"Darren," I said softly, trying to brake whatever this spell was. His finger was on my lips, so softly and agonizingly I couldn't think straight anymore.

"Hush," he said.

Was his face coming closer? Was he going to k-.

_Damn._

Darren was _kissing_ me. _Darren_ was kissing me. Darren was kissing _me._ And _God_ did it feel good. His tongue softly slid between my lips an- goodbye sweet world.

I didn't understand one thing of it. Here I was, kissing Darren, feeling _everything,_ and while we kissed exactly like this before, it didn't feel the same. This felt _magical_ and _right_. His hand was suddenly on my cheek, cupping it gently, and I couldn't help but lean in while his other hand locked itself around my neck, softly caressing the hairs at the base.

The sudden need for oxygen tore his lips away from me. I was perfectly fine without oxygen. I wanted those lips back on mine, now!

Darren looked at me with utter confusion and disbelief. Did…did he regret it?

"Wh-what was that?" One simple question that holds many, _many _more other questions.

"That was me kissing you," Darren said with an indifferent tone.

He really could be very infuriating, couldn't he?

"Believe it or not, I did register that fact. I mean what _was_ that?" He wasn't going to get away with this that easily.

"It… Did you… Look I'm sorry. I probably shouldn't have done that," he said and actually sounded depressed. Did I want him to say sorry for kissing me? I carefully reached my hand out and cupped his cheek.

"Don't apologize. Just tell me why you did that," I said and looked at him with too much hope, I knew that. He angled his face slightly and nuzzled into my hand. I couldn't help but smile at that, reminding me of another moment at which he nuzzled me. Lying on a bed together, smiling shyly and feeling so warm, fuzzy, and exposed.

"It's just. God, Chris. I didn't plan this alright?" Darren said and gazed at me desperately. "Don't think for one second that I invited you over, and cooked you a fancy dinner, so I could just make out with you or something. I- "

"Why did you invite me over then?" I asked, because _why_ did he? I could imagine why, but what if it wasn't that? I couldn't stand to get my hopes crumbled like that.

"I saw your scene with Grant today." Darren said and took me entirely of guard with that. What the hell? Before I know it he had my hand entangled with his, looking at me with such hope and that _something_ again.

"Hear me out, okay? I saw your scene with him. And before that too. He- He was flirting with you. Like really obviously," he said and looked at me, awaiting a reaction.

Oh my God! I _knew_ it!

"So he was! I thought it was just me overreacting or something!"

A soft glimmer of hurt flashed in front of Darren's eyes, which I couldn't quite place.

"You certainly weren't. But I was standing there with Ashley and suddenly she noticed something about me."

"You did look a bit off.." Oh. 'Hear me out'. Alright. "Sorry, go on."

"I was _off_. I was fucking _pissed_. He was almost tearing your clothes off with his eyes." He looked so much like someone actually stole his cookie I squeezed his hand to let him know no one stole me away and I was still here.

"He made you laugh, you flirted a bit back, although I don't think you know that, and he was _constantly _touching you.. and I just… I snapped."

Although it was quite flattering that Darren was so furious about Grant flirting with me, it was also a bit confusing. He liked Grant, right?

"Why? Why did it bother you so much?"

And my heart wasn't ready for the outlet of emotions that came right at me then. It wasn't.

"Because I want to be the one that does those things to you. I want to make you laugh in the way that makes your eyes explode with sparkles, which makes you eyes crinkle at the sides. I want to flirt with you and never feel ashamed for it. I want to take your hand, just because I can. I want to touch you, because you want me to touch you. I want to be able to look at you and think 'He's mine'. I want that... I want _all _of that." I said and felt my eyes watering. I was _not _going to cry, damnit. I just had a lot of feelings, right now.

He couldn't… he couldn't mean that. It wasn't possible! How could he want those things from me when that was exactly what I wanted from him? How was it possible that I never noticed this? But still… he was looking at me with such _hope_ and _adoration_, I just had to ask to be certain.

"Do you really want all that?"

"Yes, and I want so much more with you Chris." _God me too._

"And I know I want too much. I know..." _You don't. _

"You probably will never feel for me that way." _I do! I DO!_

"And even if you did, I'm certainly not good enough for you. I'm not. I know that. Oh god.."

That made my mental reaction stop. Not _good_ enough for me? Was he crazy?

"Don't. Stop it. Don't you _ever_ think you're not good enough. For me or _anybody_, okay? You are amazing! God, you're _wonderful_."

I couldn't believe he thought so little of himself and so high of me. Didn't he know how amazing he was? I didn't even notice that my hand instinctively went up to his face, and was stroking his cheek softly, but it all felt so good and natural.

"Please Chris, don't. Just don't. I really feel like a fool right now, but you don't have to be so sweet. Just tell me to back off and I try to never put this crap on you again."

Had Darren ever sounded so broken before? He did. Standing in front of my door, sobbing because his latest love shoved him aside like some garbage.

_I need to fix this!_

Leaning forward I pressed our lips together again. Darren gasped, apparently not expecting this. All the feelings I had repressed for _so_ long went in this kiss, and I felt Darren starting to respond, his hands tangling in my hair to bring my face closer.

"God _Chris,"_ he gasped against my lips, attacking my mouth again.

I slid my arms around his neck and lower back, pulling him backwards with me, positioning myself so that I was half lying on the couch.

"Dare, _please,_" I begged.

His hands were softly exploring my face, while his eyes looked at me with such devotion and disbelief, it made my body tremble.

"What do you want Chris?" he asked softly and traced the contour of my jaw.

My eyelids fluttered closed and I couldn't help the whine that escaped my lips.

"You. _God,_ I want you," I said and pulled him towards me, feeling his lips place open mouthed kisses along my neck.

He started sucking and biting softly and my moan echoed through his trailer, but I couldn't care less. My hands traveled lower, scraping my nails down his spine, which made him moan in return. His tongue was now tracing my collarbone, who know that felt so _good_? _Everything_ felt good and so utterly _right_. My hands grabbed his ass, and with that he groaned, pulling back.

_Shit. Fuck. Fuckfuckfuck. I went too far!_

"Dare, I'm-Fuck. I'm sorry. You-I'm. Fuck." I muttered pushing him off me, sliding to the end of the couch, proceeding to put my head in my hands.

Yes he kissed me, but he was still straight. Straight guys weren't usually grabbed by the ass, right? Not that I knew anything about that.

"Chris, wha- Did I do something wrong?" Darren asked and ran his hand through his hair, a habit he had when he was nervous. I knew him too damn well.

"No! You didn't do anything wrong. I- I shouldn't have done that, sorry." I felt him shuffling closer and putting his hand on my leg.

"Chris. That was amazing. Don't apologize for _any_ of that. I just, God, this is embarrassing." He muttered and now it was my turn to look confused.

"What do you mean?"

He looked at me at the corner of his eyes, blushing scarlet now.

"I _had _to pull away. You know. Because I uh... It felt good Chris.. _really_ good." Darren said, and tried to look at me, without faltering his gaze.

If it felt good, then _why_ did he pull away? Why did he _have_ to pu-. Then it suddenly hit me. My skin was already red, but now I was blushing like a freaking tomato.

"Really?" I asked and couldn't help the smirk that came on my face.

"You don't have to look so smug you know," Darren said laughing softly.

"I can't help but attract attention, I'm sorry," I said, hinting towards one of my favorite scenes between Blaine and Kurt.

Darren turned his head sidewards and I saw his eyes gleaming.

"Don't apologize, you were great," he said and grinned.

And with that we were just Darren and Chris again, dorky best friends. But apparently we had a lot more now to hold into account.

"So…" Darren said as he began to wring his hands together.

"Soo…" I agreed and looked at the ground, feeling suddenly shy.

"Why does this feel so awkward?" Darren asked, sounding honestly curious.

"Because it _is_. We're friends. And now we're.. I don't know. And that stupid playlist of yours won't shut up. Listen to what it's playing now!"

"… What is this?"

I grunted.

"Afternoon Delight," I muttered and walked towards the outrageous thing to turn it off, while behind me, Darren started laughing really hard.

"Oh my god, that thing is going to leave tomorrow! Or at least the Glee playlist is going to be deleted. This is just … Afternoon Delight," he said and still laughed.

I smiled and looked down at my knees shyly. How are you supposed to act around your best friend when you're not best friends anymore? When you're something way more than that? Were you supposed to kiss each other senseless all the time? Were you supposed to just sit around and talk all the time about your future or something? Were you supposed to talk about your feelings? I really didn't know. I had no clue at all. When Darren was on top of me, kissing me with all those emotions and rough hands in my hair, on my face, I just went with it. Everything felt good and natural, but now that trance was broken... and I really had no clue at what to do.

"So," I just said, trying desperately to think of subjects to talk about.

"I just said that. You can't steal my words like that Colfer," Darren said, smirking.

I laughed and buried my face in my hands.

"Maybe I should just go," I said, because maybe a good night of sleep would help me with figuring everything out that happened this evening.

"What? No Chris! Don't go!" Darren said, suddenly in full panic-mode.

"Don't worry Dare! It's not that I want to leave you or something, but I just think it'll be good to have some time for myself, you know. Figuring everything out." I said and smiled reassuringly.

It didn't really calm him down, judging by the look on his face. He reached out and put his hands on mine.

"Dare-" I started, but suddenly his voice sound loud and clear in the little space that was between us.

"_But baby It's Cold Outside_."

I stared at him in disbelief. My God, he really was too cheesy for his own good! And God, did I love it.

"You've got to be kidding me," I laughed.

"_Beautiful what's your hurry?_" he now sang and looked at me with adoring, begging eyes.

Looking in his beautiful hazel eyes, sparkling with so many emotions, I decided to just play along.

"_Ryan will be pacing the floor_," I sang back, tilting my head a little towards him.

A breathtaking smile was my award for singing along.

"_Listen to my hearts how it roars_," he now said, winking at me.

"_I wish I knew how to break this spell_," I now sang, standing up, walking around the couch, just as in the scene we played.

"_Baby come here, your hair looks swell_," Darren replied, making his own lyrics now too, and turning around on the couch to give me a pout.

"_I ought to say no, no, no Dare_," I sang, backing up a little.

"_Chris, you're not playing fair_," he sang with his beautiful raspy voice and with that jumped over the couch –wow ninja skills!- and grabbed me by my waist, ducking his head in the crook of my neck.

"_So nice and warm_," I softly sang and saw the goose bumps arise on his skin.

I felt his arms tighten around me and for God knows how long we just stood there like that. Bodies impossible close to each other, arms wrapped securely around the other, just to make sure he wouldn't pull away, and breathing in each other's scents. Who knew this would feel this good? I had imagined it. I did. But the way _this_ felt? It exceeded all my expectations. The way this felt… It was like coming home to your mother who always had a cup of tea for you and a hug when you needed it. It felt _right_.

"Chris?" he said softly, breath ghosting over the skin of my neck.

My lips automatically turned into a smile.

"Yes?"

"I really got you a present," he murmured, apparently too content to move.

"Oh yeah! I totally forgot! Do you want to give it to me now, or..?" I asked him, suddenly feeling overly excited. Darren had never gotten me a present before!

With that he pulled back though and turned his gaze away from me. What was wrong?

"It's okay if you don't want to give it to me now. Especially since I haven't gotten you anything and I don't want to act spoiled or something so you j-"

Darren's laugh interrupted me.

"Chris, you're rambling. It's not that. It's just… When I invited you over I did it because I was jealous of Grant. I wanted to you to myself. So I thought," he said, giving me a lopsided smile.

I returned the smile and nodded.

"So far so good I guess?"

"Yeah. Well. Then I saw this and thought it would be perfect for you. I even got a whole speech prepared you know? But then I thought it would be too much. Because I didn't even know if I would actually tell you about my feelings. And then I really thought you were going to run away, screaming you'd never wanted to see me again. So I really regretted the gift. But now you're here. And you know. And I know. And it's all just… _surreal_. And now I'm actually scared to give it to you." Darren said, speaking really fast and blinking rapidly.

Could this guy be more adorable? Really? Because every time I looked at him my heart just melts. My hands just _itch_ to touch him. Grabbing his hands, I tried to calm down his fidgeting fingers.

"Dare, I'm really glad that this evening turned out the way it did, because I for sure never thought any of this would happen. But honey, if you'd rather wait to give it to me, that's okay. I can wait."

The lips I was staring at turned upwards into a warm smile.

"I like it when you say honey," he mumbled, sounding nervous. Nervous Darren really wasn't something I saw a lot. Well, before this day I mean.

"I like to call you honey," I replied and wanted to face palm myself for my own cheesiness.

A sudden pull at my hand shook me out of my inner judgment, and before I knew it I was pushed on the couch.

"Sit. I'm just going to grab it. Wait here, alright?" Darren asked, adding as an afterthought "Don't leave okay?"

"I won't. I'm going to wait here as a good boy," I said, laughing, fidgeting a bit, because I was nervous about what gift I would get.

What could it possibly be that Darren would be scared to give it? He only bought it today, in a hurry, so it couldn't be something very magnificent, could it?

The couch dent in a little when Darren came back and set next to me. In his hands was a little red box with a bow around it. My breath caught in my throat. It was probably stupid to think, but I actually thought it was a ring. Just for two seconds though, but I thought it nonetheless.

"Chris, before you open it. I want you to know that, before all of this… I was _so_ glad that I met you. The day we met I felt immediately at ease with you. We connected from the very first start. Then I found out you knew my other work and even liked it. It felt surreal, because you were this big star, and I was just a nobody. But you did know me, liked me, understood me, laughed with me, played along with my goofiness, played my amazing on screen boyfriend and I don't know… we just fitted. I always have had good friends. You know that. But you have always been more than that. Better than that. Because it felt like you completed me in so many ways, I couldn't even keep count on it. When I didn't know how to finish my song, you just texted me a word that made it complete. When I didn't know how to act a certain emotion, you just reminded me of a situation in my own life, so that I could play it. When I was at lost for words, you just knew what to say or do. It has always been that way. Because what Blaine said may've been completely cheesy and not teenager at all, but it's true. I've been looking for you forever, and I've finally found you," he completed his speech.

Great. Now I was openly crying. And I wasn't a crier, so that said something. I swiftly swept my tears away and tried to smile through it. Now words were said when I opened the gift.

In the box were two silver cufflinks in the form of two jigsaw pieces. With the speech still in my head and renewed tears forming in my eyes, I looked up.

Darren's eyes were blazing with affection.

"My missing puzzle piece."

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><p><strong>AN: Awww, aren't they cute? I certainly think they are :) I hope you enjoyed this chapter! The gift is something I actually found by searching for an appropriate Darren gift xD This is the link:<strong>

http : / www . Treathim . com / product / my-missing-piece-jigsaw-cufflinks

**So let me know what you thought of it! I love every review I get (and alert) and try to reply to all of them! Thanks for staying with me and being such awesome readers! I love you all!**

**And ofcourse a special thanks to my beta Rose :) Thanks honey!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: Don't own Glee, don't own Darren, don't own Chris and I don't own Adele. Sadly**

**AN: *peeks head in* Hey guys! Please don't shoot me! I'm so sorry for the long delay! If you are angry you have every right to be. But believe when I say I had some good reasons. I finished this chapter last week and then it still had to get beta'd. And considering the fact that this was a pretty long chapter that took a while as well. (Thank you so much sweetie!) But don't ever think I'm gonna abandon you or this fic! I won't! **

**I'm working on the next chapter already, but meanwhile enjoy this one! And I'll update some prompt soon as well :) **

**Thank you guys for staying with me like you did even though the wait was horrible. You are all amazing. The reviews (100!) and alerts still blow me off my bobby socks :) So a big thank you too all of you!**

**Without further ado;**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 17<strong>

**- Darren -**

How could I've expected the night to go like this? I couldn't! Chris was here, he enjoyed my food, we confessed our feelings, and we _kissed_. We fucking _kissed_. I just wanted to say it all the time! Because I was afraid that if I stopped thinking it, it wouldn't be true anymore.

_I can sing it from the rooftops if you want to._

Oh, if only he'd let me. I would do it. It probably wasn't the smartest move to make though, so I just sat quietly on my couch, next to Chris, still smiling a bit about the terrible Glee playlist my Ipod had played tonight.

Chris was sitting right next to me, hands folded on his lap while his eyes focused on his knees, and his cheeks blushing slightly. He simply looked adorable. I couldn't keep the smile of my own face even if I wanted to. And I didn't want to, because Chris was the best reason for a smile. He just was.

_Cheesy_.

Shut up, you like him as well.

_I do. Very much so, thank you. I'll let you know that without me this wouldn't have happened._

"So," Chris started, interrupting my inner monologue with my brain, which was probably for the best.

"I just said that. You can't steal my words like that Colfer," I replied with a cocky smile.

Chris laughed and buried his face in his hands, blushing even more. God, could he just stop getting cuter by the second?

"Maybe I should just go," he suddenly said sounding very resolute with his decision.

That bolted me out of my musings about how cute he was. He was going to leave? No! He couldn't leave! He had to stay! If he left the spell would be broken and everything would be awkward again and then we had to act like nothing happened and then I'd hate myself for it.

"What? No Chris! Don't go!"

_Okay, that sounded very panicky._

"Don't worry Dare! It's not that I want to leave you or something, but I just think it'll be good to have some time for myself, you know. Figuring everything out." Chris said trying to give me a reassuring smile.

Not that it helped.

Why did he want to leave? What did I do wrong? What did I have to do to keep him here? I took a step forward and grabbed his hands.

"Dare-" Chris started, but I wouldn't let him.

"But baby it's cold outside."

Please stay, please stay, please stay.

"You've got to be kidding me," Chris laughed, and looked at me with wide, disbelieving eyes.

"Beautiful what's your hurry," I now tried, making my worst puppy eyes ever.

Apparently they worked.

"Ryan will be pacing the floor," a very beautiful voice suddenly sang back, which made me grin like a maniac.

"Listen to my heart how it soars."

"I wish I knew how to break this spell," Chris now sang while he followed the little dance routine from the actual scene.

"Baby come here, your hair looks swell," I replied and faced him on the couch.

"I ought to say no, no, no Dare," he said and actually backed away.

God, he just sang my name.

_He just sang your name._

I felt goose bumps arise all over my arms.

"Chris, you're not playing fair," I sang softly, jumped over the couch –thank you limbs for not flailing around!- and enclosed him in a hug, while my head was resting on his shoulder.

_Home._

"So nice and warm," he now softly whispered against my skin, which made me shiver even more.

Chris felt perfect in my arms. It felt like he was just made to be there. His arms had enclosed me as well. Was there something more beautiful then holding him like this? We fit perfectly. We were like two big jigsaw pieces. This thought made my head suddenly very clear.

"Chris?" I asked tentatively, afraid to break the spell we were under.

"Yes?"

"I really got you a present," I started.

"Oh yeah! I totally forgot! Do you want to give it to me now, or?" he asked, almost bouncing from excitement, looking very much like Kurt sometimes did.

What if he didn't like it though? What if he thought it was too soon? Or even worse, what if he thought it was childish?

"It's okay if you don't want to give it to me now. Especially since I haven't gotten you anything, and I don't want to act spoiled or something so you j-" Chris started rambling now, apparently a bit nervous about my quietness.

"Chris, you're rambling," I said with a laugh. "It's not that. It's just…" I said and took a deep breath.

Tonight was a night about honesty.

"When I invited you over I did it because I was jealous of Grant. I wanted to you to myself. So I thought maybe I can tell him my real feelings when he is over and I've really impressed him with my cooking skills," I said, smiling a bit self-conscious.

"So far so good I guess?" he said and give me 'go-on' smile.

"Yeah. Well. Then I saw this and thought it would be perfect for you. I even got a whole speech prepared you know? But then I thought it would be too much. Because I didn't even know if I would actually tell you about my feelings. And then I really thought you were going to run away screaming that you never wanted to see me again. So I really regretted the gift. But now you're here. And you know. And I know. And it's all just… _surreal_. And now I'm actually scared to give it to you."

_Wow! Slow down cowboy!_

Damn, I probably blew this up already! I was rambling like a nervous idiot. Why the hell would he want to stay? I was acting like I was twelve or something!

With a soft smile he entangled our fingers again, making my heart automatically turn more calm.

"Dare, I'm really glad that this evening turned out the way it did, because I for sure, never thought any of this would happen. But honey, if you'd rather wait to give it to me, that's okay. I can wait."

Cyan colored eyes sparkling brightly and lips that spoke an endearment to me while we were holding hands. I really could get used to this.

"I like it when you say honey," I said with a nervous undertone, because all of this was still so new.

He called me 'honey' before, but not like this. He held my hands before, but not like this. Hell we even kissed before, but that was _nothing_ like the kiss we just shared. And I count the three hours making out in the back of a car _and _four hours of rolling around in a bed with that as well.

"I like to call you honey," Chris' voice warm with a loving tone.

This was it. If I didn't give him my present now, I probably would never give it. So I pulled him to the couch and backed away.

"Sit. I'm just going grab it. Wait here, alright? Don't leave?" I asked, suddenly afraid that he would sneak away when I wasn't looking.

"I won't. I'm going to wait here like a good boy."

I walked away towards my bathroom, and put my hands on the sink, leaning forward. Okay, breath in, breath out, Darren. It's only Chris. He's your best friend. He likes you just as much as you like him. Well at least you think that. So you're just going to get over there, give him this present and tell him why. That's not so hard, is it?

After that little pep talk I grabbed the little jewelry box and walked back towards my couch. Letting myself sink down next to Chris, I felt my hands starting to shake. I heard a soft intake of air and decided to start explaining the gift, because he needed to know where it stood for before he opened it. So I just spilled it all out. All my memories, all my emotions, all my feelings. The way we instantly connected. The way Chris just _understood_ me. There was no one like Chris. I thought I knew myself pretty well. I thought I was an adult and ready for the world. But I'm sure that without Chris I wouldn't have made it this last year. I would have been stranded, but Chris _was _here and that meant so many things to me.

"Because what Blaine said may have been completely cheesy, and at the same time mature, but it's true. I've been looking for you forever, and I've finally found you."

Chris his eyes were constantly looking in mine, tears gathering in the corner of his eyes, slowly trailing down his cheeks. He was now more beautiful than ever. Swiftly he stroked his tears away and I was struggling to swallow the lump that was in my throat. What would he think of it?

Trembling fingers untied the bow and opened the box. Eyes still wet from the shed tears looked at the cufflinks for a moment before they looked up at me again, new tears forming in it.

He really was what this gift said.

"My missing puzzle piece."

A sound that was mixed between a laugh and a sob escaped Chris' lips. His fingers that were still trembling while holding the box, were clenching the box just a tiny fraction more. Eyes were wide and disbelieving, while filled with wonder and affection as well as something else, which I couldn't quite put my finger on. His head shook a little.

I started to get nervous at the lack of a verbal reaction. Chris was good with words, heck he was a writer! He always had snarky comments, funny replies, or just downright honesty in his way of speaking. And now he was just staring at me and the box, lips forming no words at all.

"Is it- Is it too much?" I asked, hating the vulnerable tone my voice had.

His eyes snapped up again.

"No-God no, Darren. It's just… God why can't I even make good sentences anymore? I'm just thinking in quotes which is ridiculous! I-Shit."

I smiled tentatively.

"What quote?"

"You always zig when I think you're about to zag?" he said with a hesitant look in his eyes. Almost directly afterwards he rolled his eyes and scuffed at himself. "God, I'm so bad at this. You can still back away you know, I won't blame you," he said in a joking tone, but I immediately knew there was a word of truth in it.

Chris was just as insecure about all of this as me. It was new and it felt amazing, yes, but there was also this constant thought of 'what if I'm screwing this up?' At that moment I just thought we should be honest with each other at all times, and that it would be alright at the end.

"Oh no Colfer, I'm not backing away again. Not ever!" I said and smiled, wincing a little when I saw Chris' reaction.

He looked positively frightened _and _bedazzled at the same time. Right. Probably not a very smart thing to do. Say words like 'ever' only one hour after you confessed your feelings about a guy.

"So I'm stuck with you then?"

I shrugged.

"Yes, it's true, it's true, I am happy to be stuck with you," I said in a singing voice.

Chris laughed and closed the box that was still in his hands.

"Thank you Darren, I-. As you can see I'm a bit speechless which doesn't happen very often. Like never. So I think it says enough, but it really means a lot. Thank you," he said and leaned forward to give me a kiss which I happily returned.

Because hey, I could kiss Chris now whenever I wanted! And wasn't that the most awesome thing in the world?

_I can agree to that._

Smiling softly, I backed away from him again, letting my hands rest on his knees. We just stared at each other for a moment before I felt nerves going through me _again_. You'd think it'd stop somewhere tonight, but just _being_ with Chris really made me all giddy and nervous again, acting like a small child. I couldn't help the goofy grin that was on my face which I tried to hide with my hands.

"Now I feel bad for not having anything in return," Chris said, sounding honestly upset about that fact. "Especially now your gift turned out to be like one of the greatest gifts _ever_. How am I supposed to top that? And to think this is only your first gift! I'm already doomed," he said, huffing a little, while his eyes showed his amusement.

"So you're already assuming I'm going give you more gifts then?" I asked raising one eyebrow in the air.

_As if you planned any different._

Chris blushed at that, which is a trade I usually only saw on his face when he was playing Kurt.

"Well I-No. But I'm just saying. I can never give you anything in return that will be better or even as good as this," he said pointing towards the box.

My hand gripped his, my whole body constantly feeling like it needed to be near Chris.

"Chris, you don't have to bring me a gift. You're enough you know," I said, squeezing his hand a little.

Chris laughed and shook his head.

"Alright, enough with the cheesiness before I actually have a sugar overdose from all your sweet words!" he stated and stood up from the couch, not noticing the look of hurt that crossed my face.

Was I already too much?

"Do you want something to drink?" Chris asked while he peeked in my refrigerator.

I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat. I really had to stop worrying this much. I would scare him away with acting like a whiny teenager girl.

"Sure, there must be some beer in there?" I asked.

Chris backed away from the fridge, in his hands a beer, and of course a diet coke.

"You do know I only keep that stuff there for you, right?"

"I do!" Chris said and grinned.

"I thought you were afraid for a sugar overdose, and yet you're drinking coke," I said eyeing the can he held.

"Ah, but that's why I drink _diet_ Coke."

Chris laughed, a genuine laugh, which made his nose crinkle up in an adorable way, and which made my heart flutter. God, I really was in it deep with this guy, wasn't I?

_No shit, Sherlock!_

What! I'm still getting used to the fact that Chris actually _knows_ it now, and feels the same!

_I always told you he would._

Yes, but well. There was a very good possibility that he wouldn't find me attractive, nice, or anything. There were a lot of hot gay guys in his life right now, so how does that say he would choose _me _of all people?

_Because you **know** him. He's himself with you, you'll like him anyways._

How could Chris not be himself? He was the most amazing guy ever! So funny, witty and goddamn attractive. It would be a shame if he wouldn't be himself with others.

_But then again a lot of bullies have tried to beat and yell that all out of him. _

A soft laugh shook me out of my conversation with my brain-_again-_ and made me look up. Chris was standing next to the couch, drinks still in his hands, and a very amused expression on his face.

"What?" I asked, confused about what was so funny.

"You're just-. Do you have a lot of inner monologues? Because otherwise you really have to go to the doctor or something," Chris said, putting the drinks down while sitting down on the couch.

My eyebrows shoot up on their own.

"What? Why?" I asked incredulously

"Seriously? The expressions you just made were really reactions to an actual conversation or something!" Chris said, sounding very amused.

When I gave no reaction at all, because hey, how are you supposed to explain that you did have conversations with yourself in your head? It sounded just as weird as it probably was.

"Uhm, Dare? If you have… like voices in your head or something, I think I should know…" Chris said, trying to keep the humor in his voice, even though I could hear he was actually a bit worried.

"Is it weird to have inner conversations with yourself? Like you're reasoning with yourself?" I asked, feeling a bit vulnerable, because everyone was always used to my nerdy-ness, but sometimes I actually wondered if I was really _normal._

Soft fingers brushed against my cheek, turning my face towards Chris'.

A reassuring smile and a stroke of his thumb made my heart stutter again.

"No. I think everyone does that, but you're just the only one who is brave enough to actually confess it," Chris said, thumb now caressing my lower lip.

My eyelids started to flutter, cause of his words, and his touch. Such a simple touch, but it made me want to kiss him so much.

Apparently I wasn't the only one with that need, because before I knew it, Chris was kissing me again, feverishly so. And what else could I do then respond to him? My hands found his hips and grabbed them, maybe a little too hard, but the moan that escaped Chris' lips told me otherwise.

Before I knew it, I was straddling Chris on my couch, our lips connected, tongues swirling around each other while his hands were in my hair, softly tugging the curls at the base of my neck, which made me groan in his mouth. Chris backed away from the kiss and breathed deeply, before he attached his lips to my neck, making open mouth kisses at it while sucking the sensitive skin there. I tilted my head a little, so he had better access while I felt my cock growing erect, because of all the things that were happening at once. The noises that Chris made weren't helping either. Chris shifted a little so he could let his hands wander travel down to my lower back, before he slid his hands under my shirt, and reached up again.

_Holy fucking hell._

Blunt finger nails were scratching lightly at my bare skin underneath my shirt, making a shiver go through me. The slight switch in positions also made me feel some other things. Like the fact that I wasn't the only one aroused. I felt Chris' hard cock digging in my hip, and it didn't even bother me. I always thought, ever since I knew about my crush on Chris, it would take a while to get to the point to actually _want_ a guy in that way too, but the things that Chris did to me… No woman ever made me feel this way.

"Darren, I-" Chris started, groaning softly when I started to rub my hips against his.

"Hush. I know... but I don't care," I replied, hearing the pure _want_ in my voice as well.

Chris opened his eyes again and stared deep into mine.

"Are you sure? We could also just-. Just make out, I'm fine with that," he said, hands now softly stroking my back.

I smiled at him, touched by his honesty and affection. After all, he could have just started to do things to me without checking, right?

"I'm sure. Let's just… see where this goes, alright?" I asked and pecked him softly on his lips.

He nodded and kissed me back. "Alright."

The soft stroking at my back, turned into light scratching again. Lips were suddenly back on mine, while our tongues fought for dominance. Chris won this time, and laid himself down on the couch, while tugging me along. I can't even describe in words how it felt to be possessed by Chris in this way. It overrode all my expectations, and felt thrilling, every nerve in my body felt over-stimulated, but I didn't want it to stop. Not for one second.

"Fuck Dare," Chris said, voice sounding rough, which made my blood rush towards my already aching dick.

"Don't stop," I groaned and pushed myself even more down at him, feeling our erections grind against each other.

"_Dare,_" Chris moaned, echoing my own moan that left my lips when I felt the friction I just created.

"Do it again, _fuck_, don't you dare stop now," he muttered, hands grabbing my ass, pressing me down on his crotch.

Was this a smart thing to do on your first evening together as a couple? No. Did this all go too fast? Probably. Did I want it to stop? God, no.

I quickly complied his wish and started grounding down at him in a steady pace. Our groans and moans sounding so loud and hot in my small room.

Chris his hands were still holding onto my ass with a fierce grip, tensing every so often when a trust was particularly well directed. I was leaning on my elbows, but they started to ache soon.

"Chris- Fuck you're so hot like this," I said, probably to honest, but feeling the need to express the things I was feeling. "You're so beautiful. God." I said now, leaning my head down to his. "Perfect," I muttered before I crashed our lips together again, lips meeting in a sloppy way, more teeth clashing, and tongues touching then an actual kiss. Chris leaned up on his elbows as well now, this new angle making him able to buck his hips up to mine as well, the pace growing steadier. I pulled back from his lips and pressed my forehead against his shoulder, breathing labored.

"I-I'm close," Chris stuttered, hips moving more franticly now, one hand reaching up to my back, nails digging in my flesh through my shirt.

I just nodded against his shoulder and sucked on the exposed piece of skin my lips had found there in the V-line of his shirt.

That was all he needed, because then he cried out my name in a way that was so animalistic and hot that it made me go over the edge as well, gasping his name while I came. Our hips stuttered against each other a couple of times more, before I felt my body go limp, slumping down atop Chris, probably suffocating him with my weight, but he didn't seem to mind. He actually closed his arms around me, and snuggled his face in the crook of my neck, trying to catch his breath.

We just lay there content, sated, and too comfortable to move.. although the drying cum in my pants wasn't something that felt _really _pleasant, but who complained about such a small thing when you had Chris Colfer on top of you?

Chris suddenly pushed himself upwards, pushing me up as well and laying me back down on the couch, knees next to my hips, shuffling back so he was out of my reach. His expression was unreadable, and I felt my breath catch in my throat. He didn't regret it did he?

"I really need to pee," he said, looking embarrassed and slightly frustrated.

I laughed, hearing the tenseness in the sound of it. I nodded as if nothing was wrong, but I felt my jaw tightening.

Chris, attentive as always, noticed it anyway.

"What's wrong?" he asked, shifting his legs, so he sat on the couch in a normal way.

I shook my head, looking down, just hoping he would go the bathroom and… and I didn't even know what I wanted to happen next.

"Dare," he said with a warning in his voice, making my head shoot upwards. He could sound pretty dominant if he wanted too.

And what was the point to start lying now when we had been honest to each other for the whole evening?

"I just- Do you regret it?" I asked so softly I was hoping he didn't hear me at all.

Wishful thinking of course, because Chris' eyebrows shot up high, mouth opening slightly.

"What? Why? No! I..I-Do you?" he exclaimed hurt and now a bit scared as well.

_Way to go Darren, screw everything up within two minutes afterwards._

I resisted the urge to yell to my brain and focused on Chris instead, trying to voice my words in a good way so he wouldn't run away after it.

"No, of course not! No, Chris." I said trying desperately to make him believe me.

He just nodded, but he still looked afraid, so I had to do something.

"God, I'm really not good at this. You can still back away you know," I said, trying to lighten the mood by mirroring the words he used earlier this evening.

It worked, the corners of his mouth lifted up for a little. Just a little, yes, but it was better than nothing.

"Okay, we _are_ going to talk about this, but I _really _have to go to the bathroom right now," Chris said and walked away, giving me one reassuring glance over his shoulder, before he disappeared.

Sitting alone on my couch gave me some time to think before he came back. I really needed to straighten some things out. For one, I really needed to stop doubting everything that was happening. For two, I shouldn't freak out about every little thing that happened between Chris and I now that we were… Yeah, that was actually kind of point three. What were we now? A couple? Boyfriends? Or were we just a friends-with-benefits thing? That last thought made me shudder. I really didn't want that. I wasn't some kind of floozy. But how was Chris? I knew for a fact that he hooked up with some guys when we were going out with the cast. How was I supposed to keep Chris with me?

_Make him feel like he's the most important thing in the world_.

I nodded. I could do that. I was good at big gestures and being too honest for my own good. Smiling in relief I watched Chris come back.

"Feel better now?" I asked and grabbed the abandoned beer that was still there. Nothing wrong with some liquid courage, right?

"You have no idea. So, what was that about me regretting this?" Chris asked me, getting straight to the point.

I swallowed.

"You're usually not this forward," I said, trying to lighten the mood first.

He just shrugged.

"I feel safe with you I guess. So tell me?"

"Well. I'm just very anxious. I don't know. I've wanted you for quite some time now, and now I actually have you.. it feels like you could slip away between my fingers in a blink. I don't want that. I know you had that with some other guys-just a onetime thing, but I don't want that, Chris. I'm not like that." I admitted, feeling my eyebrows knotting together.

Chris looked down at his knees, hands gripping his knees tightly, and the sudden realization that this could make me loose him _or_ could make us both stronger hit me.

"I'm not proud of that Darren, you should know that. But…" He opened his mouth and closed it again, trying to find the words he wanted to say.

Chris closed his eyes, turned his head and then looked me straight in the eye.

"You know I didn't have many friends back where I came from. So you can probably figure out that I _also_ didn't have a lot of male attention there. Like… none. So when I came here and suddenly everyone knew me, I felt special in a way. Yeah it freaked me out as well, but the fact that guys suddenly noticed me, made me feel something. And since I didn't have _any _chance of meeting guys somewhere else, because you know, no spare time at all, I just thought 'Why not?'. But it never felt right. I'm quite like Kurt, wanting the romance and all that. In a way I'm sorry for not waiting for the right person, but it also made me value other things. Like real feelings and motives. I became better at reading people, well except for you, because if I'd known that you wanted me in this way, God, I would have stood on your door step in a second!" he said, laughing slightly.

"I could have told you sooner I guess," I said, smiling softly.

Chris rolled his eyes and popped his can open, apparently remembering that he had a drink as well.

"That would have been nice, yes," he said and smirked. "But better late than never, I guess?" he asked.

I nodded.

"I'm sorry that I freaked out just now, but I don't know. It's just all very new, I guess?"

Chris scooted closer to me resting a hand on my knee.

"It's new for the both of us, but just like you said, let's just see where this goes, alright?" he said, eyes sparkling with hope, and a little wonder.

I laid my hand down atop his.

"Alright," I said and pecked him softly on his lips.

"Now I'm going to take a shower and go to bed, because I'm freaking tired." I stated and stood up, beer almost done.

Chris looked puzzled for a second.

"Oh, alright. Well let me just finish my drink and then I'll be going as well," he said and smiled, although it didn't reach his eyes.

I looked down at him quizzically.

"What the hell are you talking about? You're going to shower as well, after me, and then you're going to sleep right next to me, because I didn't sleep _that_ well since before Glee. So I'm giving just you the honor of being my own personal cuddle pillow for the rest of the season at least," I said and gave him my biggest grin.

Chris just looked amused and shook his head.

"I already wonder how I can put up with you Criss," he said pushing me to the bathroom.

"Go, I'll clean it up here, and search for some clothes in your dresser that I can wear tonight."

I was already in my bathroom, but I poked my head out the door, and wiggled my eyebrows at him.

"_Nothing_ looks good on you as well you know," I said, flirting shamelessly.

"I really think you have two different personalities in that head of yours sometimes," I heard him mutter, before I undressed myself in my bathroom, smiling inwardly.

With a towel wrapped around my waist, I walked into the bedroom. I technically knew Chris was there, but that still didn't prepare me for the fact that he was standing there with a bare upper body.

I felt my mouth drop open. I never ever saw him with a bare chest. And God, I missed something before tonight. His chest looked absolutely gorgeous. He had a light trail of hair from his sternum to his belly button, and the line continued underneath it, into his light grey sweat pants he now wore.

_God he looks hot in your clothes._

I couldn't agree more.

And that wasn't even all. People probably didn't believe me right now, but Chris had abs. Fabulous abs at that. I wanted to drop to my knees and trail them with my tongue... Probably a bit too much information, but that's how they looked. And his arms were probably even better. Underneath all the layers of clothes he usually wore, you could never really see what was there. But let me tell you.. he looked good. He looked strong. He could probably pick me up with ease and hold me against him. God, that thought made images go through my brain that probably weren't very appropriate right now.

"Enjoying the view?" I heard him say in a sarcastic manner.

My eyes shoot up to his and I noticed the smirk he had on his face. Okay, so my staring didn't really go unnoticed.

"I sure am. Ready to go to bed?" I asked, now walking to my dresser to find some clean boxers and a shirt to wear to bed.

"Yeah, I washed up in my own trailer and came back again. I burrowed your pants, is that okay?" he asked, head tilted slightly in an awaiting manner.

"More than okay," I assured him as I slipped into the clothes I found.

Chris was already slipping underneath my blankets, and I couldn't help the jump of my heart from excitement. I was sure nothing was going to happen anymore tonight, but having Chris in my bed was probably the best way to end this day. I walked around the bed to open up my side of the covers. Diving underneath it I snuggled closer to him.

"Spoon time," I said, sneaking my arms around his waist, pulling him against me.

"So, you weren't kidding about the cuddle pillow?" I heard him ask, voice laced with amusement.

I made an agreeing noise.

"How could I ever joke about something like that? Cuddling is a very serious matter you know," I stated in a serious tone.

Chris laughed, which made me feel his bare chest tremble against my arms.

"Oh I know. I've known since I met you actually."

It was quiet for a while and I almost started to doze off, lulled by the soft breathing of Chris next to me.

"Dare?" Chris asked in the silence.

"Hmm?" I mumbled, trying to stay awake.

"Thank you for tonight. I really had a great time," he said and squeezed my arms that were now enveloped by his hands.

I smiled against his shoulder.

"Me too, I- I really didn't think it would go this way, but I'm glad it did," I said, kissing his shoulder blade softly.

"Me too," he said, and was silent for a few seconds, which let me drift off again.

"Sweet dreams honey," he now whispered.

The term of endearment made my lips turn upward on their own.

"Sleep tight Chris," I replied and breathed in his smell, really dozing of this time.

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><p><strong>AN: So there it was! Some smut, the gift from Chris his perspective and he's staying over. I hope I fulfilled all your wishes :p Probably not. Let me know what you want! I'll do my best to fit it in. And please let me know what you thought about it! Reviews always make me very happy and I always love to reply to them :)<strong>

**Thanks!**


	18. Chapter 18

**AN: *hides behind tall buildings* Omg. Please don't shoot me. I really am so sorry for not updating this any sooner. If you've read my other story 'Movie Night' you know why it has taken me so long. And I'm truly sorry. Hell, I'm disappointed in myself as well. I'm just really grateful that apparently you guys are still coming back to read this story. Truth be told I had to read back for a little to even know where I left of. I'm probably the worst writer ever.**

**No, not probably. It's a fact. **

**And because I already felt guilty for the delay, I decided to go on unbeta'd. It means I probably make more mistakes in my grammar (please feel free to point them out! I always appreciate it if people do it!), but it does mean you'll get my updates a week earlier than normally. That doesn't mean I'm not entirely grateful towards my beta, because she's an amazing girl who made me very happy with everything she did for me.**

**So, without further delay, here's chapter 18!**

**Enjoy :)**

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><p>- Chris -<p>

When Darren disappeared in his bathroom I closed my eyes.

Breath in.

Breath out.

God.

Did all these things just really happen? Because it really felt too surreal and too good to be true.

The soft humming of Darren who was apparently a showersinger as well, made the reality of this all sunk in.

Darren and I kissed. Darren and I admitted we wanted each other. Darren and I _came_ together.

The words _Darren and I_ were never going to be the same again.

I am used to say those words a lot. To friends, to colleagues, to family, to journalists. I always used them in a friendly matter. We were colleagues, best friends, on-screen lovers. But know we suddenly were _so_ much more. The boundaries of our friendship have always been expanded, but now there suddenly were no boundaries left. We could tell each other everything now. We could show each other everything and we could _do _everything _with _each other now. The possibilities and visions that rushed through my mind made me feel dizzy and slightly overwhelmed.

I decided to go back to my trailer and get a shower there. That way I would be done at the same time as Darren and wouldn't have to waste any time without him because I still needed to clean myself up then. Opening his dresser I quickly found comfortable looking pants. Grabbing them I left Darren's trailer, rushing towards my own trailer, hoping no one noticed me.

The hot water poured down on me and I surprisingly felt some stress wash off me. I didn't even know I was stressed in the first place. Not that it was that weird. I mean, I _did_ have a lot of feelings and thoughts today. Darren really made my day an emotional rollercoaster. Looking down I smirked.

A physical rollercoaster as well, huh?

Scrubbing away the dried come I thought back of the blissful moment on the couch. God, it had felt so good. I've done it before, don't get me wrong, but with Darren everything just felt… better. Every word, every touch, every look went deeper and made me feel warmer than ever before. An uncontrollable smile made his way up to my face.

_Darren and I_.

Shutting down the shower I grabbed a towel. Quickly drying myself off, I put Darren's pants on and brushed my teeth. I collected some clean clothes for tomorrow. Putting on my jumper I looked around for one last time. I didn't really need anything else, did I? Holding them close to my chest I tried to get into Darren's trailer again without getting noticed.

God I felt like a freaking spy or something! Not that even was a possible career for me. I would be the clumsiest spy there was. Hell even Johnny English would look graceful in my presence.

Opening up Darren's trailer I let out a relieved breath. I made it back and Darren was still in the bathroom so I could make it to his bedroom without immediately having to deal with a dripping hot Darren. A flash of arousal went through me and I tried to get in some fresh air. Okay. Probably not a smart idea to think about things like that right now.

Should I put my jumper off? Thinking that it would be much too warm to wear it in bed I decided to just take it off. Folding it neatly with the rest of my clothes I laid everything down on the little closet that was standing on the side of the dresser. I apparently hadn't noticed that the shower stopped and that Darren was in his bedroom as well now.

The gasp that sounded through the air _did _caught my attention. Turning around some more I could take in Darren's form.

_Okay dripping and hot weren't such fantasies anymore. Hello wankmaterial!_

I did _not _just think that. I did _not. _But hell he looked good. Letting my eyes travel upwards, desperately trying to avoid just dropping them to his towel covered area, I saw the look on his face. Apparently he was captivated with _my _looks as well as I was with his. He was practically drooling!

"Enjoying the view?" I asked him and couldn't hold back the smirk that reached my face.

His eyes found mine again and I saw the amusement shining in there.

"I sure am. Ready to go to bed?" he asked me while putting on some clothes.

Don't look don't look don't look-Oh god he's dropping the towel. Holy mother of- He asked me a question! What did he ask? Answer the question Chris!

"Yeah, I washed up in my own trailer and came back again. I burrowed your pants, is that okay?" I asked, praising myself loudly inwards for sounding so calm and collected while I was having a mental break down inside.

"More than okay," he said and smiled softly, really not seeing what the hell he was doing to me.

Trying to flee from the temptation that was Darren I decided to get in bed already. Slipping underneath the blankets I couldn't hold back a content sigh. Beds really made me very happy. It was just so comfortable and reassuring after a long day. Darren finished dressing and walked to his side of the bed.

_We had our own sides in a bed!_

I could almost hear him purr when he immediately snuggled towards me and pulled his arm around me while we lay chest to back.

"Spoon time!" he said in an adorable only-Darren way.

"So, you weren't kidding about the cuddle pillow?"

"How could I ever joke about something like that? Cuddling is a very serious matter you know," he replied in a tone that hold no argument, making me laugh.

"Oh I know." I replied and thought back of all the hugs I received since I'd known him. "I've known since I met you actually."

Darren didn't reply and just hold me close, making me feel his heartbeat and soft trailing fingers.

I really wouldn't mind to sleep like this every night.

"Dare?" I softly whispered in to the dark silent room.

"Hmm?" he murmured, already half asleep.

"Thank you for tonight. I really had a great time," I said and tried to hold him closer, making me feel like I was with him in every way possible.

His lips turned upward against my shoulder, making me feel all warm inside.

"Me too, I- I really didn't think it would go this way, but I'm glad it did," he said, now softly pressing a loving kiss against my shoulder blade.

"Me too."

How different it was from the last time we fell asleep together. We didn't even _know _ we were going to sleep together that night. I just woke up from soft lips against my forehead.

So Darren _did _kiss me that morning!

The sudden realization made me smile and close my eyes, whispering one last sentence before I dozed off, the last thing I heard, his soft whispered words 'Sleep tight Chris'.

Groaning softly I tried to open my eyes even though they rather stayed close. Something told me it was probably time to get up. Another day of work, wasn't it? Stretching my arms I yawned and finally opened my eyes.

I really felt well rest, which was saying something because I always felt like I needed to turn around for at least ten times more before I would feel like this. Finally I got my eyes open and try to take in my surroundings. This wasn't my trailer.

What the-

Suddenly all the memories of last night came rushing back to me, making me feel warm and fuzzy inside. Turning my head I prepared myself to see the sleeping form of Darren next to me.

The space next to me was still a bit warm, but very empty. Sitting up slightly I looked around, straining my ears to find out if I could hear him wondering through his trailer. But no sounds reached my ears, it was very quiet.

Too quiet.

Banishing all the fears and questions my brain immediately came up with I tossed the blankets away, desperate to find out why Darren wasn't next to me.

Wasn't he the one who persuaded me to stay? Then why did he leave?

One look at my phone told me he didn't texted or called me.

Anxiousness was floating through me, making me scared and fidgety while I walked through the trailer, looking if I could see any trace of Darren. The smell of fresh coffee hit me like a brick wall. So. He had made some coffee. Walking over to the kitchen I found an empty cup standing there with the coffee still hot next to it.

Was that for me?

Shrugging I just took it. Who else would it be for? Sipping the coffee, which tasted delicious, I felt my nerves calm down a bit.

But still…

Where was he?

Putting my arms around myself I slumped down on the couch, trying desperately to remember everything he said yesterday. Did I read something else in it? Did I made it all up in my head? The memories of us, _together_, on this couch made me blush and shook my head. No. I didn't make this all up. Darren said he had been looking for me forever. Even the memory of it made me blush. And the cufflinks. God. Could the guy get more perfect? Knowing Darren, he probably could.

Suddenly the door opened, shaking me out of my thoughts and making my head jerk up. There he was, handsome as ever and taking my breath away immediately.

Honey brown eyes locked into mine with a bit of surprise, but still filled with so much warmth and calmness he instantly relaxed me.

"Hey you," I said and smiled softly, swirling the coffee in my cup.

A beautiful smile that reached his eyes greeted me back.

"Hey. I didn't think you'd be up already. You looked pretty out of it," he answered me.

I quirked my eyebrow, looking at him with the hint of a smirk.

"Did you just confessed you were watching me when I was asleep?"

"Ofcourse I did," Darren scoffed. "You've never looked so peaceful before. It made me happy to just watch that," he went on.

And with that he showed me immediately that this was still Darren. My old Darren. The Darren who's veins were filled with affection and who's best interest was always to make me feel happy. Which he did with saying sweet things like that, looking at me with those big gorgeous eyes.

God, how quickly I had fallen for him.

"Thanks for the coffee. I almost thought you ran out from me again," I said and tried not to sound too insecure.

Darren, as always, just marched over the carefulness of the situation and dropped down next to me.

"I knew you'd think that, that's why I came back, planning to be next to you when you'd wake up. I'm sorry Chris. Don't be afraid of things like that though. I'm not planning on going anywhere," he said and pecked me on the cheek.

This still made me feel giddy and nervous at the same time.

"I'm very content," Darren murmured now, letting his head fall in the crook of my neck, nuzzling it softly. "Right. Here."

Soft kisses trailed my neck, arising goosebumps on my skin and making shivers run down my spine.

"Me too," I whispered, somehow afraid I would break the spell we seem to be under.

Tilting my head slightly I made sure Darren had enough space to continue his ministrations. It felt good, really good, but the curiosity in me couldn't hold back the question.

"Where were you just now?"

Darren stilled for one seconds, quickly replied "Outside," and went on if nothing happened.

Pushing him back I tried to look him in the eyes. Something was wrong.

"What? You're not telling me something here," I said knowingly while stroking his hand.

"Leave it, it's nothing important. I can think of more important and _pressing_ things at the moment," he said and smirked slightly, almost succeeding in gaining my attention elsewhere.

"Darren," I just said and with that he let out a sigh.

"Fine. Promise me to not laugh."

"Wha-"

"Promise me, Chris," he said and looked me deep in the eyes.

"I promise. Now tell me!" I said and tried to tone down the worry.

"I…I needed to cool down."

He needed to cool down?

"Why? It's not that hot in he- _Oh_," I suddenly realized, feeling very stupid for not getting it right after his words.

"Yes, _oh_," Darren said and rolled his eyes, standing up from the couch.

"Are you embarrassed?" I said, frowning at him.

"Yes I'm embarrassed! Ofcourse! It's not cool to wake up with a freaking boner next to your -… Your. Fuck! You know what I mean," Darren muttered, looking flustered and frustrated.

The sudden realization that we still hadn't _named _this – whatever this was – downed on me again, but I decided we could brace that subject later on. First things first.

"I don't think it's embarrassing," I said and this caught his attention. "I think it's actually kinda hot."

A short silence hang between us, eyes interlocked, speaking without words.

The sound of a groan floated through the air, making me whimper without being able to stop it.

"Damn it, Chris. Don't say things like that when we should be on set in fifteen minutes."

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><p><strong>AN: I know it's a short chapter. I'm just really glad I made this. I don't know. It kinda feels as if the story isn't with me anymore. I had all these plans, making sure it'd contain recent things, but then live caught up with me and now all those 'recent' things are very much behind in time. So please tell me what you'd like. Would you like me to put real things in it from then (like the "I'm Kurt's boyfriend from Glee!") or would you just like me to continue it like this. Because if you like the first option, please help me with remembering things like that! You can leave it in the review or put it in a privatemessage or something. <strong>

**Oh and yes, before I forget! My Tumblr url changed a little while ago. It's 'weveneversaidgoodbye' now :) So feel free to follow me or stalk me or whatever! **

**Thanks for staying with me guys. You are seriously too good to be true!**

**Lots of love,**

**Sjell**


	19. Chapter 19

**AN: As you may have noticed I started a new multichaptered story on here and that made me realize I don't really deserve your reviews and comments on that one if I just abandon this story. It wouldn't be fair to you or too pour turned on Darren :P. So! Even though I should be finishing my last work for my exams I'm actually writing this. Yup. Being like that again.. Ah well! I hope you still enjoy this story and that I still can get in the flow of this story considering the fact it has been _march_ for crying out loud. Shit. Now I feel even worse. I'm really sorry guys!**

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><p>Waking up next to Chris is a feeling you can't really describe. I mean. Have you ever thought about waking up next to the person you love? You want to spent the rest of your life with? With whom you want to get old, married, have kids, do everything with? Well, that's exactly how this felt. And the most wonderful part of it all was that Chris was looking so peacefully and well rested he made my heart beet faster. He never looked so beautiful and rested before. The sunlight was softly coming through the window, shining on his pale skin, making his freckles stand out. His chest was heaving with every breath and I could see his pale neck, begging to be marked. His neck was like that. People sometimes made fun on Tumblr about Blaine being addicted and attracted to Kurt's neck. Well. They were right.<p>

_What's holding you back?_

Ignoring my sex addicted brain, I continued my observation of him. His lips were puffing slightly with outgoing breaths, reminding me of how they felt against my lips yesterday.

_Fucking amazing and wonderfull and why are they not on yours again?_

Shaking my head slightly I tried to ignore him again. But it was already too late. Memories of yesterday swam in the forefront of my mind, making me remember all too well how certain parts of Chris felt against me yesterday.

Letting out a soft groan I decided that leaving Chris would be a very wise option before I would jump him still asleep.

_I don't see a problem with that._

Shut up!

God. I thanked my brilliant brain for helping me out earlier, didn't I? Well. He wasn't doing that right now. With a half hard cock I slipped away from our warm cocoon and walked to the kitchen, trying to distract myself from Chris.

Sipping the fresly brewed coffee I noticed it wasn't really working. It could be because of the fact that I knew Chris was right_ there_. Or it could be because of the fact that the couch on which it all happened yesterday was also right _there_. Taking the cup of coffee I decided that going outside would be the best idea. Some fresh air would help me calm down.

Hopefully.

Sitting on the doorstep I thought everything through, unable to hold the smiling back. I really loved Chris. And here he was. Loving me back. Or at least, wanting me back.

I decided it would be time to go back after having calmed down enough to be able to face Chris without dropping to my knees immediately. Besides they had to be on set soon, so he better woke him up before he woke up himself and freaking out about him not being there.

Opening the door I immediately noticed Chris sitting on the couch, looking a bit anxious and confuse.d

"Hey you," he said, voice still a bit sleepy and rough.

_I wouldn't mind waking up to that voice every morning_.

"Hey. I didn't think you'd be up already. You looked pretty out of it," I replied with a smile.

"Did you just confessed you were watching me when I was asleep?" he asked me, sounding a bit scandulous.

_Busted!_

"Ofcourse I did. You've never looked so peaceful before. It made me happy to just watch that," I told him, figuring honesty wouldn't kill right now.

A warm smile was my answer.

"Thanks for the coffee. I almost thought you ran out from me again," he said and with that immediately explained why he looked a bit anxious and concerned.

This called for a Darrentervention. Dropping down next to him.

"I knew you'd think that, that's why I came back, planning to be next to you when you'd wake up. I'm sorry Chris. Don't be afraid of things like that though. I'm not planning on going anywhere," I said and pecked him on the cheek softly, feeling dilirious about being able to do just that. "I'm very content. Right. Here." I said and breathed in his scent, making me feel giddy and warm.

_I thought you were trying to cool down?_

Oh _now_ you're complaining? I thought you wanted this!

Without really able to hold myself back I started to kiss him softly, along to his neck.

"Me too," Chris whispered, tilting his head to give me more access which I happily accepted.

"Where were you just now?"

_Hard, outside, needing you_

"Outside," I decided to go for and continued my kissing his neck.

Chris, know-it-all, pushed me back and frowned at me, making me whine a little.

"What? You're not telling me something here."

"Leave it, it's nothing important. I can think of more important and _pressing_ things at the moment," I smirked, hoping it would convince him to drop it.

"Darren," his annoying know-it-all voice said again and looked at me with knowing eyes.

Like he didn't know already.

"Fine. Promise me to not laugh."

"Wha-," he interrupted me confused.

"Promise me, Chris."

"I promise. Now tell me!" He actually looked worried now. Great.

"I…I needed to cool down."

"Why? It's not that hot in he- _Oh_," he suddenly realized my _pressing_ matters in the first place.

"Yes, _oh_," I said and felt annoyed, standing up and walking away from him.

"Are you embarrassed?" I heard him ask behind me.

"Yes I'm embarrassed!" I replied, my hands gesturing for empathize. "Ofcourse! It's not cool to wake up with a freaking boner next to your -… Your..." What the hell was I suppose to call him? Was he my boyfriend? My lover? My friend with benefits? Shivering at the last thought I decided to just go on. "Fuck! You know what I mean."

"I don't think it's embarrassing," Chris said with a nonchalant tone, edged with _something_. "I think it's actually kinda hot."

Turning around my eyes bored into his, seeing the need and want there as well.

"Damn it, Chris. Don't say things like that when we should be on set in fifteen minutes," I groaned and tried desperately to ignore his whimper.

"You started this," Chris replied, amusement shining in his eyes.

"Yes and I'm ending this too," I replied, desperate to get him away from me before we would _really_ jump each others bones.

_Again, I don't see a problem with that._

"Are you now?" Chris asked and stood up as well, walking towards me, almost as a lion crawling his prey.

A shaky nod was all I could master, before his smirk got me and I pulled him close, crushing our lips together.

_Good boy! _

His needy moan made me even more desperate, clinging to him, hands clawing at his shirt, needing him _closer_.

Our tongues found each other in practiced ease, trying to dominate each other, not caring in the least who'd win. His hand traveled upwards to my hair, pulling it possessively and making me buck my hips up at him.

At that he broke away from me, panting and leaning his forehead against mine.

"We- We should get dressed and stuff," Chris stuttered, eyes wide and blown.

"Here I was trying to actually get you out of them," I muttered, smirking at him before nuzzling him.

"Darren!" Chris said with a scandalized tone, swatting my shoulder but his eyes full with tenderness and amusement.

"Go on you. I'll just try to cool down. _Again_."

His laughter rang in my ears, making me smile as well before taking a deep breath.

Alright.

A bright new day.

No.

A bright new day _with _Chris.

Smiling I quickly went through my morning ritual, meeting Chris a couple of times on the way, grinning everytime I saw him.

"We're so gonna set our alarm sooner if this is gonna happen more often," I said and winked at him through my mirror.

Chris quircked his eyebrow.

"So we're gonna do this more often?" he asked me, adjusting his hair in the mirror, making it look even more perfect.

I loved his hair.

"Y-yeah? I mean. If you don't mind that is. If you-Well.. Yeah?"

_Very adoquate Darren_

Chris turned towards me, meeting my eyes fully and grabbing my shoulder.

"Hey, stop the worrying. Ofcourse I wouldn't mind. I would love too, actually."

The truth was shining through his eyes and it made my heart flutter.

"Good," I replied and grinned stupidly, leaning in to peck him again.

"And Dare?" Chris asked, sounding a bit insecure again, immediately taking my attention.

"Yeah?" I asked him, eyes full of concern.

"Are we boyfriends?" Chris asked me, his eyebrows furrowed and a blush on his cheeks.

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><p><strong>AN: I know it isn't a long chapter but please bare with me! I'm trying to get into this story again. Please help me out by letting me know what you think of it! Oncoming Tuesday is my last day of school which means I'll have more time to write again. I mean. Untill I find a job that is, but still. I'm planning on writing a <em>lot<em>! I love you all for staying with me and hope you still like it!**

**Love,**

**Sjell**


	20. Chapter 20

**AN: Welp! All the reviews! Thank you so much for sticking with me guys! That means a lot! I suddenly got two jobs the moment I graduated so that was kinda cool! Also means I'm extremely busy again . But. I got a middag off today so I decided I should write another chapter! I have no idea what yet. Let's find out together! :)**

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><p><strong>Chapter 20<strong>

Oh now he suddenly blamed me? Not one to back down, I put a hand on my hip and told him just that.

"You started this."

"Yes and I'm ending this too," Darren replied in a tense tone, his whole body rigid, ready to jump and run. Or jump and do... other things.

"Are you now?" I asked him while walking towards me, the smirk still un my lips.

Darren looked back at me, his eyes wide and his face nodding shaky before he suddenly pulled me close, finally, fucking _finally__, _kissing me. I couldn't escape the moan that left my lips, his kisses were that good and I wanted him so much it was almost embarrassing. His fingers digged into my shirt, pulling me even closer. I followed him willingly, kissing him back just as eagerly, threading my fingers through his hair and pulling it slightly. Me tugging his hair made him buck his hips up, suddenly reminding us both of what we were about to do and what we actually should be doing.

Resting my forehead against him I tried to catch my breath.

"We- We should get dressed and stuff," I managed to get out.

"Here I was trying to actually get you out of them," Darren muttered with a smile, nuzzling me softly, making me smile in return.

"Darren!" I said, trying to sound scandalized even though I was actually laughing.

A warm smile and bright eyes looked back at me from very, very close.

"Go on you. I'll just try to cool down. _Again,_" Darren said and stepped away from me before he walked to his bedroom again.

I stood still for a moment, trying to cool down a little before I went on with getting myself ready for work.

If I was going to wake up like this every morning from now on, I could get used to that.

With a content and lovesickpuppy smile I walked to the bedroom too, grabbing clean boxers and some of the stuff Darren used for his hair.

"We're so gonna set our alarm sooner if this is gonna happen more often," Darren said when he finished brushing his teeth and looked at me through the mirror.

Chris quirked his eyebrow.

"So we're gonna do this more often?" I asked him, putting the gel in my hair and trying to get it a bit nicer than my bedhair.

"Y-yeah? I mean. If you don't mind that is. If you-Well.. Yeah?"

Hearing the hesitance and worry in his words I stopped my hair-fumbling and grabbed his shoulder, turning him towards me.

"Hey, stop the worrying. Ofcourse I wouldn't mind. I would love too, actually," I said and tried to give him a reassuring smile.

"Good," Darren replied and leaned in to kiss me on the lips softly.

"And Dare?" I asked, thinking back at the conversation we had in the living room.

"Yeah?" he asked me, the concern evident in his voice.

Should I ask him? Would I ruin everything? Would it scare him away? Would he think it's stupid that I need a name for it?

"Are we boyfriends?"

There. I asked it. Now it was Darren's turn.

He tilted his head first, his eyebrows furrowed and even more triangularly than normally. His lips parted as if he wanted to say something, but he didn't, closing them again.

"Nevermind I asked. I'll just- Nevermind," I said, trying to save the embarrassing and hurting moment now, already planning on walking away from him.

His hand quickly reached out and grabbed my wrist, eyes widening.

"No! No, Chris, wait. I-You just caught me a bit of guard here," Darren quickly said, his eyes still warm and truthful, succeeding in calming me a bit.

"Yeah I know. I shouldn't have asked. Just forget about it," I said and tried to smile even though it was forced.

"Chris," Darren said, his voice serious and demanding attention now. I looked up at him. "I'd love to be your boyfriend."

Oh.

He actually... Oh wow.

I had a boyfriend.

Darren was my boyfriend now.

"Chris I would feel a bit better if you'd actually say something now," Darren said a bit stressed now.

"Yes! Oh shit. Yes. I'm sorry you- I was just shocked as well I guess. I'm sorry! Yes!" I said, falling over my own words.

"As in, yes? We are boyfriends now?" Darren asked, a wide smile beginning to form on his face.

A happy laugh escaped my lips, still filled with disbelieve.

"I think I asked that question first mister Criss. I'd love to be your boyfriend as well."

Before I knew it I was enveloped in warm, strong arms, eager lips already kissing me deep and holding me close.

I happily kissed him back, letting him take control of it and leaning into him like I was meant to be there, my hands on his hips.

Finally breaking away from the eager and hot kiss, I chuckled slightly.

"We're so gonna be late on set."

"Ryan loves us. We're gonna be fine," Darren said and winked, letting go of me so he could get himself ready again.

"I hope so," I just said and started to hurry myself as well, a bit amazed at how well we could work around each other without being in each others way.

But then again.

Hadn't we always worked together well?

Smiling at Darren we both went our way on set, silently agreeing on talking further later.

"What's up with you?" Lea asked and wrapped her arm around mine while we walked towards the canteen.

"Nothing much, why?" I asked her back, tugging her close.

"You've been wearing this weird smile on your face all day now," she retorted and gave me a questioning look.

"Have I now? I thought we agreed on the fact that I'm sometimes weird?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"Yes, we have. But still. Did something happen?" she asked, stopping me now and turning me towards her.

"A lot of things happen, Lea. What precisely are you pointing at?" I asked, not really lying but not telling the truth either.

"Darren and you," she said, making me drop my mouth open immediately. "Oh my god! It did! It was just a wild guess, but it actually- Oh my god! Chris!" she almost screamed, bouncing on her feet and tightening her grip on my hands.

One could never lie to Lea. I learned that the hard way.

With a sigh I nodded reluctantly. "Fine, yes. Something happened. Why are you so happy about that?" I asked her, tilting my head a little.

Her eyes widened. "Why am I so- Chris! I've been rooting for you two since the very start! You're perfect for each other! And you can use a fun sweet guy like him! And when he told me a few days ago he was actually in love with you I wanted it to happen so badly! God! I thought it would never happen because you can be so damn stubborn sometimes, but now it did! And look at you! You're smiling! And happy! And you're gonna have lots and lots of hot gaysex now and finally Cory and I won't be the only ones anymore and now I finally -"

I started to laugh out loud, but quickly slapped my hand over mouth when she started to talk about hot gaysex, eyes darting around to see if anyone heard.

"Lea! Calm down! God! You look like you drunk ten cans of energy drink!" I laughed, shaking my head a little.

"Sorry! I'm just so happy, Chris! For you! For him! God! Where is he? I need to hug him!" she exclaimed, already looking around to see if he was any near.

"He'll be in the canteen," I said and kept a grip on her now so she wouldn't run off right away. "But did you just say he told you he was in love with you?" I asked her, pieces of the big puzzle suddenly falling on their right places.

"Yeah he did. We sort of pulled it out him though, but he told us. God you should've seen him, Chris. He was blushing and giddy and so lovesick it was almost comical!" she said with a laugh, her eyes sparkling, showing her happiness for us.

"I did see him," I said vaguely and shook my head again. "Well, off you go short stuff. Go get a hug from my man," I said, enjoying it way too much that I could actually say that now.

Instead of running away, Lea jumped up and hugged me, wrapping her arms tight around me and pressing her head against my chest.

"I'm really happy for you, Chris. You deserve each other."

Hugging her back with equal strength I felt a genuine smile reaching my lips. I didn't exactly know why, but the fact that Lea was so happy for me and the said I deserved Darren and he me, meant the world to me.

"Thanks Lea," I said and pressed a kiss against her cheek. "You're the best."

Lea grinned and cupped my cheek before she did run off to the canteen, eager to get that long awaited hug.

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><p><strong>AN: Planning on going for short chapters. It lessens the pressure for me to start a new chapter! I hope you like it :) <strong>


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